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Why are girls so clumsy ? - Page 2

post #16 of 33
Thread Starter 
Lol
post #17 of 33
...
post #18 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by redcaimen View Post

Why do you feel the need for a $600 lamp* at an age when dating usually ends with everybody intoxicated? If you are over the age of 30 and you are still dating women that get so wasted they crash into things thats called alcoholism not clumsiness.









* why does anyone feel the need for a $600 lamp

Stop thinking like such a small-timer.
post #19 of 33
True story. I once had a girl that ripped open the corneliani shirt I was wearing, because she couldn't wait. Naturally all I could think off where the ripped seams and missing buttons while we where screwing all those hours...
post #20 of 33
I'm definitely not damaging enough things around Matt's house... lesson learned satisfied.gif
post #21 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by lpalma121 View Post

I’ve had it already with some of these women,, seems every time I get together with one something always happens. It ranges from being tipsy and burning the head liner of my Mercedes with a cigarette ( because your drunk ass can’t wait) to breaking wine glasses at my home. Let’s not forget the drinks that get spilled on my expensive shirts and suits (yeah…. Ouch) at bar/lounges. Yesterday was the best , some new girl came over and accidentally knocked over my new $600 lamp , luckily only the shade got damaged so I hope when I go and scavenge for a new shade it’s not a big deal but I have a feeling it is. I tried to act all cool about it like “it’s just a lamp” , meanwhile I’m thinking I can ’t wait until you ass leaves so I could try to piece this baby back together somehow. It was like that scene from The Christmas story” with the leg lamp. And what do all these events have in common… They all say “I’m sorry”. But you know what , sorry doesn’t pay for the damage that’s been caused. I wouldn’t even have the gal to request money for these “accidents’ Funny thing is, how come I have yet to go over to someone’s home and cause damage to their property or even their vehicles? Is it just that I’m careful? Is it that I know things cost money? Hey I also get tipsy …..but I’m aware of my surroundings and the things I do. These women get a little drunk and start knocking shit all over the place like toddlers. I’m just done.

Pretending to act cool about the lamp was the wrong way to go, mang. Now she'll never learn. Next time it'll be an even nicer lamp that meets its maker. Or maybe a statue or something (you are classy enough to own numerous statues, right?).

The better strategy would have been to fall to the floor, flapping your arms about wildly and emitting a shrill, piercing cry of pain, while occasionally petting or nuzzling the bent lampshade and staring up at the girl, menacingly, like a wild animal stricken by the loss of its cub.

The thing is, it wasn't just a lamp. She won't know that unless you make it very clear. Drunk bitches be socially tone deaf.
post #22 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by nootje View Post

True story. I once had a girl that ripped open the corneliani shirt I was wearing, because she couldn't wait. Naturally all I could think off where the ripped seams and missing buttons while we where screwing all those hours...

Luckily, you made her pay for it.icon_gu_b_slayer[1].gif
post #23 of 33
How did this thread has not been passed to DT I don't know but it brings the lulz.
post #24 of 33
What you need to do is go over to her place and mess some stuff up for revenge. For teh lawls, you should be completely sober and just "accidentally" knock over everything you can. Then, start drinking, say "sorry," and leave. Bonus points if you rip her top off on your way out the door. Revenge dates are the best, second only to spite dates.
post #25 of 33
or you could forget to pull out. oopsies! I'm so clumsy!!
post #26 of 33
Give her an upperdecker. That's a classy way of showing her proper etiquette.
post #27 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by FLMountainMan View Post

Give her an upperdecker. That's a classy way of showing her proper etiquette.

HOLY FUCK! You have just entered the same category as Ed. DO NOT GOOGLE AN UNKNOWN TERM!
post #28 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

HOLY FUCK! You have just entered the same category as Ed. DO NOT GOOGLE AN UNKNOWN TERM!

That's like Class A stuff right there. Ed brings the Major League material.
post #29 of 33
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

HOLY FUCK! You have just entered the same category as Ed. DO NOT GOOGLE AN UNKNOWN TERM!

damn! next time the wife makes me go with her to her snooty relative's house maybe I should do this
post #30 of 33
So is this the OP?

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