To all the successful, experienced members - Was it all worth it? - Page 4

I think you will find that wealth will make you comfortable and give you options...but it will not make you happy. The status that wealth imparts is very superficial and unsatisfying.

I've found that happiness (or maybe just contentment) is much, much more about good health, good relationships with family and friends and community, and fulfilling activities. It's easy to take things like these for granted, but without them, life tends to fall somewhere on the scale between total misery and depressingly empty.

So was "it worth it?" Well, if you started out poor, you will probably need to work for most of your life anyway, so you might as well do something that is interesting and that pays reasonably well.

But trying to climb the corporate ladder to the highest levels will ultimately demand giving up almost everything. So I would say balance is more important than a complete focus on career. If you find that your career is forcing you to compromise your health, a good family life, and outside activities, then it may be time to think again. And unless you are in a glamour career like the performance arts or professional sports, most employers will be pretty flexible in terms of giving you what you need for life balance - good people are hard and expensive to find, so if they like you, ask for what you need.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bings 


this is USUALLY the case but you can get around it. you simply need to bring so much to the table that you can straight face "you stay home and raise the kids and have dinner ready when i come home... oh and you are not allowed to get fatter or in any way not hot... in fact, you need to get increasingly hotter despite the kids and diapers etc."

if you're bringin the heat this CAN happen and it friggin should.

if a man's earnings continue to increase and he keeps himself fit and healthy then i don't see why a woman should be allowed to do any less unless she wants him to trade her in for a younger model.

i've gone too far here and i know that.

I'm glad you know. This post lacks humanity and insight in the extreme. If a marriage consists of one person "not allowing" the other basic life happiness, then divorce or misery will follow. 

Quote:

Originally Posted by bings 


or your wrong and i'm right.

i guess we'll see.

OK, let me know how it works out for you.

Quote:

Originally Posted by LooksGood 

Thanks.  I met with one of the chief officers at my company today and it went well, though he didn't take action to place me in another role yet.  I think his overall message was:

 

1.  I'm impressed

2.  This company needs smart, passionate people like you

3.  I want you to stay as an engineer for now

 

So while it was not the best outcome, at least:

 

1.  I left a good impression

2.  If a position/role comes up, I'll be on the shortlist.

Well, you certainly can keep your job as an engineer. You may or may not be on the "shortlist" for any other positions.

Some advice if you really want to advance your career: rather than focusing on "moving up", look for ways you can take additional responsibilities. Make yourself a key player in as many realms as possible, not through an official promotion, but by energetically looking for larger roles - even campaigning for them. This means identifying things that need to be done in the organization that no one else is doing; often it is easy to grab these since most people are lazy and don't want the extra responsibility.

This strategy can put you in a position as an indispensable player in the organization, and give you tremedous leverage when it comes time to negotiate raises and promotions. And it can happen in just a few years if you keep focused. And even if your current organization does not recognize your value, the skills gained will enable to go for positions in other firms that do recognize it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Piobaire 


Key point here on how to piss off your direct supervisor: go above him/her and try to impress someone several rungs up the org chart.

True, getting along with everyone is important. But waiting for your supervisor to tell you "what you need to do" won't work either. If you are in a hurry and ambitious, you will want to be their boss soon, and they are not going to tell you how to do that, because they probably don't know, and of course they have their own agenda.

You will need to find ways to make yourself widely indispensable by grabbing responsibilities as they become available. Three notional examples to give the general idea:

1) You've heard a new proposal/technology marketing effort is starting soon and key roles have not been assigned. Think about a key role you would like to occupy (and think you could do a good job with) and start campaigning for the job.

2) Senior management is flying in to get a brief on your local organization's ongoing projects and technologies. Volunteer with your local organization to build a briefing summarizing those projects and technologies you are familiar with, and volunteer to give it to senior management when they visit.

3) The yearly research budget needs planning but everyone is busy: volunteer to organize and implement the planning process, defining research goals, budgets, schedules, and connecting it to the hoped-for business results.

These may not be directly relevant to your current organization, but hopefully help illuminate the idea.