Thanks for all the info in this thread. I have flirted with weights over the years (longest stint was about 5 weeks, lost motivation, seemed futile against my genetics, etc), now looking to finally take it seriously, enjoy it, and be patient regarding results.
I was once diagnosed with Body dismorphic disorder, which is to be delusionally obsessed (negatively) with your appearance. I never believed that, for the simple fact that i am too tall, narrow, and skinny. However, the result has been many periods of depression, not being able to face people, etc. Currently I have been out of work two years, for fear of being seen, and being fed up with yo-yoing in and out of jobs/relationships etc (a total pussy basically

)
Anyway, I am 29, 6 ft 3 or 4, and currently 209 pounds. The last two years of inactivity have actually added weight that I thought was impossible (I was around 150 to 160 pounds for a decade before, I have a high metabolism, ectomorph, same build as my dad basically), but it hasn't spread at all from a bit of extra gut, upper thigh, and chest mass. My shoulders are very narrow, my neck is long and very thin, as are my arms and legs. My calves are basically non existent, insanely thin wrists/arms, lower legs, ankles.
My initial questions are regarding those extremities...with a beginning routine, would it be advisable to do more 'fiddly'(for lack of terminology knowledge) exercises to try and target those extremities as well as the basic compound routines, or just focus on the basic compound exercises for a while?. I would like a bit bigger chest and upper arms, to look broader across the shoulders, and more muscular (solid) upper legs, but my real issue is with my extremities.
I don't want to be 'huge' and muscle bound (not that there's anything wrong with that), but to try and be more solid especially in the arms and legs (neck), where no amount of eating is adding size.
Also, I only have a weight bench, dumbells and barbell (and enough starting weights) at this stage, so I may be limited to what exercises I can do.
I was looking at a few beginner routines, and Ab exercises are prominent (
http://www.freedomfly.net/workouts/workout1.htm ) That's one example I was looking at, but I haven't seen Ab exercises mentioned much on this thread. (excuse me if I missed it...which raises another question) Can someone suggest a website that explains and/or shows how to do do things like dips, curls, fly's, neck exercises, squats etc, without machines or pulleys?
I think I have a basic picture of how to start off, big thanks to this thread, but choosing the exact exercises (and actually knowing what they are, how to do them the best, eg, when last I was doing squats with the barbell behind my neck, I couldn't balance to do it smoothly, or calf raises awkwardly against a wall, etc) is a bit overwhelming...any help appreciated, sorry for my vagueness.