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College transfers and social life (transferring colleges late here)? - Page 3

post #31 of 52
10/30/12 at 4:44pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fisher Shard View Post

how can I as a college transfer live the same type of social life as the type of kids you see on American Pie basically

 

Before you said that, I had a feeling that you wanted a Hollywood style university experience. Maybe those exist, I don't know. I equate it to a woman desiring a Hollywood romance.


I think you've gotten some good advice and I'll just expand on it by saying that more people will give you more opportunities to make friends and have fun. However, if you don't have the skill set to do that in a small pond, how can you expect yourself to be able to pull it off in a larger setting?

These have all been said, but I agree with them....
- Join clubs/organizations
- Involve yourself in class/study groups
- Make conversations with your fellow students

From my own experience, it's actually easier to meet people in smaller classes than large lectures. You get to know the others in the room and talk to them.


Now, the following that you wrote hardly demonstrates that you're up to the challenge of fitting in to a social setting. You're arguing a bit, being condescending, etc. Not exactly the marks of a charm school graduate. If I were to make a bigger suggestion to you, I'd evaluate my own approach to making friends/having a social life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fisher Shard View Post

I do not think you read my statement

1. applications have been sent in
2. decisions have been made
3. things have been packed
4. plans have been made
5. I am getting out of this dump

you can make friends with older students, whatever, that isn't me, I want my age group of kids and honestly, I am just not ready to "grow up"

to me, fun in life is experiencing the moment of getting drunk, wasted, sleeping with a random girl, and seeing crazy stuff happening at a party with kids your age

why?

I never experienced that and I want to. So screw the creativity, I am leaving, and graduate school?

LOL, dude, I have had to do internships and work with grad students, you don't have time to really live life as a graduate student at all. You are too busy doing other things to even consider anything other than schoolwork.

Regardless, thanks for your advice and I am glad things worked out for you as they did.

 
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post #32 of 52
10/30/12 at 6:01pm
Thread Starter 

I talk to people and make "friends" alright, thing is, a lot of those people are in their 30s with families started and they work.

 

Lets not play dumb here, it will be easy to make friends MY AGE GROUP in a bigger university, in a commuter school it is simply difficult, very difficult.

 

Sure, I can get the numbers (and I do) and contact information. Issue is I live at home with my parents, those friends I make live about a good 8 miles away (in another county), and a lot of them work during to the weekends to hang out with anyone at all.

 

Getting numbers? Saying Hello? Asking about things? Conversations in school? THAT is the easy part my friend. Going out and enjoying weekends with them? Now that is the hard part.

 

So to say that it is easier here than at a big campus is an asinine statement.

 

Lets take other things into account here, you live in Austria, not America, it works differently here than it would there. I actually intended to make my post more geared towards the American members simply because they have more experience in this field than someone from Europe or Asia might, since college here really is different from college elsewhere.

 

I also find that on the internet it is easy for me to get frustrated as opposed to real life simply because some people make the most naive comments. Some don't even bother to read your posts so yes my condescending manner comes out fast.

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post #33 of 52
10/30/12 at 6:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fisher Shard View Post


I also find that on the internet it is easy for me to get frustrated as opposed to real life simply because some people make the most naive comments. Some don't even bother to read your posts so yes my condescending manner comes out fast.

How, in anyway, were my comments 'naive'? I read your posts, and I left my commentary...I told you what I thought.
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post #34 of 52
10/31/12 at 5:32pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fisher Shard View Post

I talk to people and make "friends" alright, thing is, a lot of those people are in their 30s with families started and they work.

Lets not play dumb here, it will be easy to make friends MY AGE GROUP in a bigger university, in a commuter school it is simply difficult, very difficult.

Sure, I can get the numbers (and I do) and contact information. Issue is I live at home with my parents, those friends I make live about a good 8 miles away (in another county), and a lot of them work during to the weekends to hang out with anyone at all.

Getting numbers? Saying Hello? Asking about things? Conversations in school? THAT is the easy part my friend. Going out and enjoying weekends with them? Now that is the hard part.

So to say that it is easier here than at a big campus is an asinine statement.

Lets take other things into account here, you live in Austria, not America, it works differently here than it would there. I actually intended to make my post more geared towards the American members simply because they have more experience in this field than someone from Europe or Asia might, since college here really is different from college elsewhere.

I also find that on the internet it is easy for me to get frustrated as opposed to real life simply because some people make the most naive comments. Some don't even bother to read your posts so yes my condescending manner comes out fast.

To address your first issue, yes, of course it's easier to make friends in a bigger university.

You say you meet people, get their contact info but have nothing to do on the weekend. How? Yeah, some of them work or have families, but are there one, two or three students that would meet up with you? You say that's the easier part, but you can't close it. Why not? There isn't anyone online that can help you with your people skills.

I didn't say that it was easier on a big campus. What I implied was that it's easier to initiate contact within smaller classes. I stand by that fact. It's easier to get to know classmates when there are a total of 20-30 students in a class as opposed to 500.

I do live in Austria. Is it possible, though, to think that I may have spent some time at an American university (wikipedia ERASMUS)? Even if that weren't the case, even in Austria we have to meet people and enjoy ourselves (together) on the weekends. It doesn't work different here, believe it or not. People here still smell desperation and pity on people just as they do in the US.

You also say that you get easily frustrated on the internet so you become condescending. Is it at all possible that those feelings are also transmitted in the real world? I can't help but think that your personality is less than stellar if you have such a hard time finding people with whom you can spend time. You have been insulting in most of your replies, you've discounted valid advice and you're overall negative and condescending. Maybe you should re-evaluate your own approach.
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post #35 of 52
10/31/12 at 8:54pm

Check this out. I'm 28 and in a CC right now cause I played G.I. Joe for eight years. I didn't know anybody when school started. The first day of school I got five numbers from chicks and met a bunch a cool dudes. Why? Because I just went up and talked to them. Meeting new people and making new friends is easy. Especially in college cause everybody is friendly as hell. I get invited to parties and stuff all the time but I turn them down. Why? Because I wanna get good grades, land a nice paying gig, and sleep on a bed made of money.

 

Even when I went to visit people at different universities it was the same deal. My brother went to UC Davis and I didn't know anybody when I went to visit him the first time. Yet I always left having made new friends. Especially girls. They WANT to be talked to. That's probably the biggest complaint I hear from chicks. They don't get laid enough and they want to be talked to.

 

Join clubs. As many as you can. I joined the film making club and I don't know shit about making movies. But it sounded interesting and the people are cool as fuck. I joined the persian club and I'm not even persian but I constantly get asked if I am so I figured why not. Plus the girls in that club are beautiful smile.gif

 

Make it a goal to talk to people. You might end up getting invited to some Project X shit....

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post #36 of 52
10/31/12 at 9:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheBIBS View Post

Join clubs. As many as you can. I joined the film making club and I don't know shit about making movies. But it sounded interesting and the people are cool as fuck. I joined the persian club and I'm not even persian but I constantly get asked if I am so I figured why not. Plus the girls in that club are beautiful smile.gif

This. Join clubs, extramural sports, or other extracurricular activities that your University offers. If you do these things and have fun you wont have a problem.
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post #37 of 52
10/31/12 at 11:43pm
...
Edited by Mark it 8 - 11/1/12 at 12:31am
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post #38 of 52
11/1/12 at 1:04pm
OP why would anyone want to spend their weekend night with you?
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post #39 of 52
11/1/12 at 1:13pm
So, OP, are you transferring to UGA or UF?
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post #40 of 52
11/1/12 at 1:14pm

Hopefully UF isn't even an option.  UGA, Bama, and Ole Miss are about the only ones worth attending.  Maybe Vandy since it's academics are incredible and it's in a cool city.

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post #41 of 52
11/1/12 at 1:42pm
SEC

SEC

SEC



Man, I think I'd have failed out, become an alcoholic, or turned into a hermit if I had gone straight from my extremely sheltered high school life to a school like UGA. Was great for grad school after I had figured my shit out, but freshman year me would have been terrified.
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post #42 of 52
11/1/12 at 1:51pm

I came from a very small school, graduated with 75 people, and came straight to Bama.  I was a pledge freshman fall and it was INCREDIBLE.  I loved it so much, i'm still here for grad school.  And headed to Baton Rouge for the big game in about an hour.  Roll Tide

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post #43 of 52
11/3/12 at 1:57pm
Thread Starter 

I won't explain this again but it is an OBVIOUS fact that people in real life are often more friendly and less combative while people on the internet are more racist, condescending, rude, and more inclined to get under your skin, exceptions exist. My personality has been described as attractive and COUNTLESS people have said to me, "dude, you need to transfer to a REAL university". Overall, ya, my personality is straight. I can maintain good conversations with nearly everyone but Hansder I do not see what you have to offer to this conversation and what help you can be. I say this in the kindest tone, do so leave this thread as you have little to contribute and some of your remarks have come off as ignorant. My goal is to seek decent perspective and advice, you haven't offered either. I highly prefer Americans exclusively post on my threads since a lot of European users have little idea of life here in the US socially, I have visited and lived in Europe before so I know. Now Hunsder, if you want to continue to be insulting then that would be bad but no one is stopping you, I am just asking.

 

Now I address others on here who have actually helped me and made decent posts in many of my threads.

 

I can meet people easily, I am an extrovert, I make friends easily, but a high number of people I meet work all weekend or live 6 to 7 miles away from me.

 

It isn't that I can't meet people, but the issues are broken down like this:

 

1. I cannot meet people my age as easily

2. When I do meet them, we hardly get to do much

3. All people my age are working to get through college

 

I think some of you have misread my post and given bad advice as a result of it.

 

LOOK, my time at my current *coughs* "university" is finished. This is my last semester here.

 

My thread asked about my time at my actual university which happens not too long from now. From what I have read online, it seems that college transfers find it impossible to make friends, I want to ask why.

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post #44 of 52
11/3/12 at 2:03pm
quit worrying and just go with it.

its not rocket science.
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post #45 of 52
11/3/12 at 2:12pm
I'll repeat it. Join clubs, intramural sports, etc. I suspect you had that at your other school too you just never did it.

As the poster said above, wherever you go there you are. Don't expect your life to change because you moved. You'll still be the same person with the same hang ups.

Live in a coop. I did and honestly I probably slept with a differernt girl every couple months for 3 years straight, and from all over the world.
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