Wedding Attire Advice - Page 3

Thanks for all the great feedback everyone. Very much appreciated.

Quote:

Originally Posted by unbelragazzo 

Here's what you do with your fiancee's aversion to bow ties (if you do want to wear the tux): find a good menswear store near you, and try on a full black-tie rig (be sure to have the low-cut evening waistcoat or a cummerbund, if you have the high-cut prom-style waistcoat it looks terrible), with black bow-tie, and have her come see you in it. It's an easy sell when you see it done right in person. There's really nothing better in all of modern menswear (if the tux can even be said to occupy a place still in modern menswear).

Given that I have some time to work with, this is a good idea. The question is where to find a good quality, well-fitting OTR tuxedo. I would think that in Toronto, the Bloor Street Harry Rosen would be my best (if not only) option. Trying on something OTR that doesn't fit well may not be the best strategy for convincing her. If there are any Toronto SFers with a better suggestion, I'd love to hear it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by msulinski 

Regarding the black suit, since there should be 0 opportunites to wear it, even the remotest possibility of wearing the tuxedo again is better than the black suit.

Just to be clear, I have no desire to buy a black suit (i.e. a matching two/three piece lounge suit). But the stresemann/stroller isn't a black suit; it's essentially a black odd jacket paired with morning dress pants and a waistcoat. Could the jacket not be used separately as a slightly more formal alternative to a blazer?

Quote:

Originally Posted by random-adam 


Possible photos to enlist in the pursuit of proper black tie might be found here (particularly the "bow tie vs. long tie" section, which properly illustrates the folly of a necktie with formalwear in ways even the least sartorially knowledgeable can appreciate).
Bonus for Firefox: the guy who put that site together is also from Toronto.

Thanks for the link, that's a great find. Examples of what works set next to what (clearly) doesn't is really helpful. Some of those examples are beyond awful (e.g. Robin Williams). I would think that just about anyone with eyes can tell that's not a good look.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Superfluous 

I've always wondered this. Is the concept of groomsmen and bridesmaids a modern invention? It seems quite silly to me. Have they always been around?

This is a good question. My guess would be that the concept isn't new, as I've seen quite a few vintage wedding photos that seem to show large wedding parties. However, I wouldn't be surprised if large wedding parties were really only common as part of larger "upper class" weddings back in the day (compared to today, when they are common at all but the smallest weddings).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Superfluous 


Have your seen their "black suits"? Chances are they look just as bad as rented tuxedos... Make them spend some money or tell them they can't be up there.

One of the two groomsmen got married last year, and I assume that he would be wearing the same suit. I seem to recall that his suit was very nice (or as nice as a black suit can be). As for the other one, I can't really remember. It may be a little fashion-forward for my liking. However, I wouldn't be comfortable asking him to spend too much money on an upgrade. It's my understanding that the bridesmaids are spending a few hundred dollars for their dresses, so I certainly wouldn't want to ask my groomsmen to spend much more than that. And I think it's safe to say that a few hundred dollars isn't going to go very far in terms of formal menswear.

But at the end of the day, I'm less worried about what they will be wearing (as long as it's conservative, presentable, and nothing over the top). Frankly, the type of people who would agonize over what my groomsmen are wearing are probably not going to be attending the wedding in the first place.

Quote:

Originally Posted by msulinski 

I can see getting a pass on evening wear when the event starts at 5:00, but really your event is starting at 4:00, since that is when the pictures get taken. I think you mentioned that the event will be in May, correct? Do you know what time sunset is in May in your location.

 

The formal morning wear that you referenced earlier does look decent, but are you sure you don't want to do a nice charcoal or navy suit instead? You will get much more use out of it in the future.

The wedding will be in mid-October. Photos will be outdoors around 3:00pm - 4:00pm (i.e. natural setting, bright & leafy fall colours). The ceremony will be 5:00pm-6:00pm in a small 19th-century-style chapel with lots of natural light. 6:00pm-7:00pm is cocktails/mingle and 7:00pm is dinner. In terms of light levels in Toronto at this time of year, by about 6:00pm it starts getting a little dim, and the sun will be down shortly after 7:00pm. The weather will play a big role too, though (i.e. if it's a cloudy day, it will start getting dim earlier).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thrifter 

Given the time of day you're getting married (most of the even will be after dinner), I would suggest that you get fitted a Samuelsohn MTM tux in the style of your choosing and do it properly with a bowtie (a-la blacktieguide.com). Tell your fiancee that your attire is something that is very important to you and it would mean a lot to you if she would back you up on this decision. If after this she still will not be flexible enough to let you choose your own attire then you've got bigger problems coming down the road.
I just got married about 6 weeks ago and wore a 3 piece PRL navy suit with a Kent Wang glen plaid wedding tie. I was very happy with how it looked and my bride was too 

If I were to tell my fiancee that wearing a tux meant an awful lot to me, I have no doubt that she would (grudgingly) go along with it. But TBH, I just don't have strong feelings about a tux one way or the other. In fact, if I were able to convince her to go the tux route, I'd probably just as soon go with the midnight navy three piece. But I still do really like the stresemann look above.