Help my family understand - Page 2

So when you respond, do you know what you're talking about?

If you have no idea why 3sixteen jeans are better, why are you buying them over the other ones?

The best thing you can do is to not even try to explain it to your family.

there is only one thing you can do

 

I've had to justify expensive (-esque, by SF standards) purchases a bunch recently as well. I'm a college student, don't have a lot of cash rolling around, but am employed. My parents and friends both shrieked when I bought $140 denim. 

 

But hey, it was my money, and I really wanted those pants. 

 

Especially for premium denim, there were a few things I said that seemed to help. I mentioned how well it wears, how the pants are meant to last for a long time and get more comfortable and interesting with age. They are an investment—not a pair of $35 levi's from Sears that you throw out once the crotch blows out. I anticipate them getting older with age. 

My first denim purchase were Blackbird Hazelwoods (might get some gripe for that but my second pair was RRL and I still love my hazelwoods to death—I'm wearing them now!). I almost always try to mention that they're made in the U.S.A. with Cone Mills denim and what this means—high quality, and supporting business I believe in. It's not just about the use I get from the jeans—it's about what kind of economy I'm supporting in buying them. I buy from brands I like who use quality manufacturers. 

 

That's the main thing—longevity, quality through-and-through. I'm willing to spend money on those things. I'd rather have 3 pairs of denim for my entire life than go through a cheap-o pair every 2 years because they start falling apart at the seams.

here's an easy solution, don't tell people how much you spend on clothing.

tell them to mind their own fucking business

Kill your parents.

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)

It's called don't give a fuck.

When people ask me how much I paid for my jeans and I tell them $300, they usually react just like you would expect.

Guess what? I don't care. When they ask why on earth I would spend that on jeans, I say: "because they're worth it and I love them." End of conversation.

I would too. It'd be bizarre to get some sort of Benjamin Button reverse aging jeans.

pretty much!

First of all, forget trying to get people to understand why you spend so much on jeans. Everyone here has a disease that is absent in 95% or more of the population. Most people think spending a lot on clothes is stupid, even if they understand and appreciate differences in design or quality. My wife has no problem with my spending on shoes, and she gets that high quality men's shoes will last for years and (probably) never go massively out of style, but she still pokes fun at me for wearing fancy shoes. And why not? It's a lifestyle decision, not an objectively rational consumption choice.

Once you've accepted that people won't understand your choices even if they accept them, you have a decision to make. You can choose to deflect the issue when it comes up, or you can choose to engage.

Personally, I choose to deflect. When friends or family ask me why I have so many shoes, I say it's because I like shoes. If they ask how much they cost, I (politely) refuse to tell them because it's none of their damn business. The only person who has the right to question my spending decisions is my wife. And if you're not married then it's no one's business at all.

If you choose to engage, then the wine analogy is a good one - cheap wine will get you just as drunk, and a lot of cheap wine isn't objectively bad, but some people just appreciate wines that happen to cost a lot. Cars are an even better analogy because just about everyone buys a car at some point in life - a Camry will get you from point A to point B just as quickly (in the real world with speed limits) as a Porsche/Mercedes/whatever, but some people just like the feeling of driving of a sporty/luxurious/whatever car. There's no "proving" that one is better than the other or that the higher price is justified; different strokes for different folks, horses for courses, an ass for every seat, etc.

Arguing about fabric weights or hardware quality is not the way to go. It's like justifying a Porsche by comparing the power to weight ratio to a Fit. It's "better", but that doesn't make the Porsche a better value, and it's hardly the point anyway.