Do you call the Police? - Page 3

Quote:

Originally Posted by GQgeek 


I think it's because people that abuse their spouses often eventually kill their spouse, or at least that is the perception, and so there is an inclination to be harsh with them right at the beginning. It might not be rational but I wouldn't be surprised if that was the source of it. There's probably an element of man beating woman worked in too, whereas random assaults are probably more man beats man and so there's less sympathy and outrage there, rightly or wrongly.

Good point regarding perception. There is the old saying... where you stand depends on where you sit.

This reminds me of the drug laws in the 1980's. Cocaine possesion had lower penalties because the perception was cocaine was for affluent white partying professionals who were a value to society. Crack posession was penalized more harshly because the perception crack was for uneducated blacks in ghettos who are violent and unemployed. 5 grams of crack triggered a minimum 5 year prison sentence versus 500 grams of cocaine.

Response is for OP....

Best move: get to a safe distance and yell "Cut that shit out else Ima call the cops, man."  Then don't call the cops.

Keep in mind that the police are not refs.  By calling the cops you may very well get that dude arrested, thereby setting into motion a chain of events that helps no one.  Him being arrested means they'll have to waste money bailing him out.  Trust me.  I know they'll waste the money to bail him out.  They do it every time.  Then they may have to hand some money to a defense lawyer.  That money could have been spent on the little girl.  Or rent.  Or food.  He may lose a job or benefits due to being locked up.  Getting him arrested may endanger the lady's and the child's well-being by cutting off income and possibly jeopardizing their housing arrangements. 

If you want to see anything other than an arrest you'd have to be a witness for the state.  In the event you actually showed up to court and followed the case through the usual delays then you'd probably see the prosecutor dump the case when the "victim" didn't want to testify or wanted to testify for the defense.  Again, trust me.  I've seen this roughly 700 times.  She'll back him and you'll be the odd man out.  In the rare event he ever got convicted for the nonsense you describe it sounds like a probation case or maybe even some kind of pretrial diversion opportunity. 

What you saw that day was behavior that did not comport with your own values and your culture's norms.  Was it illegal?  Probably close to it.  Was it ugly?  Sure sounds like it.  What can you do to help?  Not much.  Some people were born and raised to conduct their affairs this way and no one can change them.  Be careful if you choose to meddle.  You may have no idea what effects your actions will have.

I know this stuff because I'm a defense lawyer and I've represented defendants in probably 1000 DV cases in a major urban area.

Quote:

Originally Posted by handsolo 

Response is for OP....

 

Best move: get to a safe distance and yell "Cut that shit out else Ima call the cops, man."  Then don't call the cops.

 

Keep in mind that the police are not refs.  By calling the cops you may very well get that dude arrested, thereby setting into motion a chain of events that helps no one.  Him being arrested means they'll have to waste money bailing him out.  Trust me.  I know they'll waste the money to bail him out.  They do it every time.  Then they may have to hand some money to a defense lawyer.  That money could have been spent on the little girl.  Or rent.  Or food.  He may lose a job or benefits due to being locked up.  Getting him arrested may endanger the lady's and the child's well-being by cutting off income and possibly jeopardizing their housing arrangements. 

 

If you want to see anything other than an arrest you'd have to be a witness for the state.  In the event you actually showed up to court and followed the case through the usual delays then you'd probably see the prosecutor dump the case when the "victim" didn't want to testify or wanted to testify for the defense.  Again, trust me.  I've seen this roughly 700 times.  She'll back him and you'll be the odd man out.  In the rare event he ever got convicted for the nonsense you describe it sounds like a probation case or maybe even some kind of pretrial diversion opportunity. 

 

What you saw that day was behavior that did not comport with your own values and your culture's norms.  Was it illegal?  Probably close to it.  Was it ugly?  Sure sounds like it.  What can you do to help?  Not much.  Some people were born and raised to conduct their affairs this way and no one can change them.  Be careful if you choose to meddle.  You may have no idea what effects your actions will have.

 

I know this stuff because I'm a defense lawyer and I've represented defendants in probably 1000 DV cases in a major urban area.

This.

Nobody knows what they are arguing about. Unless someones life was threatened there is no reason to get involved.

For all you known, it could be two drunks doing what they do every night. Let them figure it our for themselves. You owe them nothing.

If everyone calls the police every time there is friction the police will use this as a reason to ask for more funding, and that will come out of your pocket. Nothing is free.

Let the police go use their time to fight serious crimes. Not two people arguing.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tck13 

I see no hint of insight here.  When the adults are talking then you should really just stand still and listen.  You might learn something.  If you're other 5,250 posts are as good as this one then you'd do everyone a favor by laying off the forum and devoting the time you've spent in this endeavor to dick-eating.