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dress code and culture at work - Page 4

post #46 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:43am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Now, now, guys. He's a kid so he still has a lot of time to learn and mature. I know 21 year old me was no where near as able to handle people IRL as 40 something me is. I think the kid comes from money (Rolex as b-day gift) and those folks often have a steep learning curve if that's their weakness. He says he listened on some of the advice and that shows a positive, IMO.

you are a generous and wise old man.

we also have to remember that he's from part of the country that flashy two tone rolexes are considered classy, along with mohogony fake tans and lots of gold jewlery. you have to have reasonable expectations from people.
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post #47 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:47am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Now, now, guys. He's a kid so he still has a lot of time to learn and mature. I know 21 year old me was no where near as able to handle people IRL as 40 something me is. I think the kid comes from money (Rolex as b-day gift) and those folks often have a steep learning curve if that's their weakness. He says he listened on some of the advice and that shows a positive, IMO.

To be fair, here's a poster who's jumping into the workforce and reading SF and trying to look like some of the flashier members. It's kind of hard to see the flash and realize you have to dial it back and look plain for a few years or so. Not always easy to do.
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post #48 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:47am
Who really has problems with a simple brushed steel tie bar/clip? Sure, don't break out your 20K diamond-studded gold tie bar or something equally ostentatious, but a simple one is alright.
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post #49 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:48am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Now, now, guys. He's a kid so he still has a lot of time to learn and mature. I know 21 year old me was no where near as able to handle people IRL as 40 something me is. I think the kid comes from money (Rolex as b-day gift) and those folks often have a steep learning curve if that's their weakness. He says he listened on some of the advice and that shows a positive, IMO.

To be fair, here's a poster who's jumping into the workforce and reading SF and trying to look like some of the flashier members. It's kind of hard to see the flash and realize you have to dial it back and look plain for a few years or so. Not always easy to do.

Very true.
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post #50 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:52am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by odoreater View Post

Honestly, I don't think the tie or the cufflinks are going to be your biggest problem making it in law. At the end of the day, law is a people business, and I'm not too sure about your people skills...

I've been getting competitive jobs since I was 15. I'm not listing my resume but by the time I got to DC I got every internship position I applied for. In actually very good at interviewing and making a positive and lasting impression.

I'm going into law on my own against my family's wishes. They are leaving me a thriving company and I'm turning it down to try to make it on my own.

I've said this many times before, but I'll say it again. If you met me in person and had lunch with me you'd have a completely different view of who I am. All you see on the Internet is my material things and the way I defend myself, that's a bad side to base a judgement on.
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post #51 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:55am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TauKappaEpsilon View Post

They are leaving me a thriving company and I'm turning it down to try to make it on my own.

I've said this many times before, but I'll say it again. If you met me in person and had lunch with me you'd have a completely different view of who I am. All you see on the Internet is my material things and the way I defend myself, that's a bad side to base a judgement on.

Called it.
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post #52 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:57am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TauKappaEpsilon View Post


I've said this many times before, but I'll say it again. If you met me in person and had lunch with me you'd have a completely different view of who I am. All you see on the Internet is my material things and the way I defend myself, that's a bad side to base a judgement on.

That may be so, just consider what I said a warning. I'm not trying to be a dick, just trying to help...
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post #53 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:58am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TauKappaEpsilon View Post

(...)
I'm going into law on my own against my family's wishes. They are leaving me a thriving company and I'm turning it down to try to make it on my own.
(...)

Out of curiosity, why are you taking this route? Are you planning on joining the company once you have a few years under your belt?
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post #54 of 92
7/3/12 at 9:59am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TauKappaEpsilon View Post

This thread was asking for advice, advice on the cuff links not the watch. The advise was received and listened to. I bought very casual cuff links as to not see overly showy. The advise about the watch was also taken into consideration except I'm not returning it to buy a new one. The watch was much more expensive then the cuff links (as well as a 21st birthday gift) and I will Not return it because some of SF doesn't like it.
Again, I asked for advice about te cuff links and received it and listened to it. I also was told te tie was to wide so I bought some slimmer ties.

How do you manage to spell advice properly in one sentence but not the subsequent ones?
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post #55 of 92
7/3/12 at 10:02am
TKE -

what ever you've done by 21, I had done more impressive things by that age . and I was probably almost as big a dick as you are. and it would have been nice if some nice older and wiser men had helped me see what a dick I was, so that I would'nt have made some of the mistakes that I made.

by the way, somebody gave me a very nice watch once that was not correct for me to wear, and I kept it to wear when they were around, and I wore the proper watch the rest of the time.

anyway, good luck.
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post #56 of 92
7/3/12 at 10:24am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post


Called it.

Called what?  Anything you might have "called" you knew from what I've released about myself.

Quote:
Originally Posted by odoreater View Post


That may be so, just consider what I said a warning. I'm not trying to be a dick, just trying to help...

I absolutely will and I appreciate your advise.  Sometimes its hard to see who's being sincere and who is being a dick for the "fun" of it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas View Post


Out of curiosity, why are you taking this route? Are you planning on joining the company once you have a few years under your belt?

Well, my family's company is smaller and I want something bigger, something corporate.  I was offered a job last year (for when I graduate) at one of the biggest, if not the biggest, companies for that field in the world.  I might take that and then try to climb the corporate ladder.  

 

Law is something completely different.  I have no family in law, very few connections, and absolutely zero background knowledge in the field, however, I personally like it.  I would really like to pursue white-collar crime (either defense of prosecution).

Quote:
Originally Posted by gort View Post


How do you manage to spell advice properly in one sentence but not the subsequent ones?

Apologies for iPhone typos.

Quote:
Originally Posted by globetrotter View Post

TKE -
what ever you've done by 21, I had done more impressive things by that age . and I was probably almost as big a dick as you are. and it would have been nice if some nice older and wiser men had helped me see what a dick I was, so that I would'nt have made some of the mistakes that I made.
by the way, somebody gave me a very nice watch once that was not correct for me to wear, and I kept it to wear when they were around, and I wore the proper watch the rest of the time.
anyway, good luck.

Maybe instead of being a dick, you could tell me what I'm doing wrong?  I came to this forum because I sought out the wisdom, and suggestions of people older, moer experienced, and more successful then I am.  When I ask questions all that happens is I get shit on.  So again, I apologize if I've come across as a "dick" but understand that a lot of that is because I see responses from all of you and think I'm getting shit on, rather then getting sincere responses.

 

I'll be back in DC for the next two years during the first week of August.  I challenge any of you who are in the area to PM me and come meet me for lunch in the city and then make a decision of me based on face to face conversation.

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post #57 of 92
7/3/12 at 11:05am
You found it as well, how many more people need to tell you to tone it down? It's cool to have a two ton sub, but wear it out it at night....or don't and damn the consequences.

Either you will assimilate or people will learn to like you for who you are, if you have a personality that is charming enough. Your decision on which approach is better, but to say that no one here offered suggestions or advice is rediculous.


These guys rarely take it easy on anyone, especially the new guy, but they rarely offer poor suggestions.
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post #58 of 92
7/3/12 at 11:18am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TauKappaEpsilon View Post

Maybe instead of being a dick, you could tell me what I'm doing wrong?  I came to this forum because I sought out the wisdom, and suggestions of people older, moer experienced, and more successful then I am.  When I ask questions all that happens is I get shit on.  So again, I apologize if I've come across as a "dick" but understand that a lot of that is because I see responses from all of you and think I'm getting shit on, rather then getting sincere responses.

.

you are getting shit on because the issue isn't your cufflinks, its your attitude.

almost everybody who has commented on your question has young people who report to them, perhaps all - I don't know. one of them has hundreds of people who work under him. I have mentored several people who started out fresh from nothing and ended up in very good corporate positions, and I presently have a few younger people who report to me.

when we comment on your basic life philosophy, we are not shitting on you, what we are saying is that the cufflinks are irrelevant. what is relevant is your attitude. and, if you were reporting to somebody to a collegue of mine, not me, I probably would never say anything constructive to you about it, I'd just ridicule you behind your back, which would impact your career and you would'nt know abou tit. so we are helping you out here, and you are getting all pissy about it.


so, you want good advice? get yourself some simple well made off the rack stuff from BB or Jos bank or something similar. button down collars, standard cuffs. blue shirts, gray or khaki pants. maybe good, simple shoes. get a nice timex beater. lose the jewlery. there you go, bob's your uncle.
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post #59 of 92
7/3/12 at 11:42am
This thread is painful to read. facepalm.gif
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post #60 of 92
7/3/12 at 12:29pm
TKE, first of all, good luck in your internship and career going forward.

Second, you've had the good luck in this thread to get Piob, GT, and OE giving you their honest feedback. You might not like the substance or delivery, and you may feel defensive, but they know their shit and do not lead people wrong (well, outside of CE, depending on who's posting). Don't take it personal, because if they're ready to snark to your face, your bosses will be snarking behind your back. Furthermore, this - as I see it - is not so much a matter of taste as it is a sociological phenomenon of accepting your (current) place in a corporate hierarchy.

Again, good luck.
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