If you go to a Cracker Barrel restaurant most any morning (EGADS! I stooped so low as to want southern "country" breakfast!) you'd rethink the value and purpose of braces...........
Damn! I wish I had a photo of the braces fashion show that is sponsored daily at a Cracker Barrel.
BTW, I do applaud you for using a Coke bottle for spittle collection. I bet it is a 6 1/2 oz bottle that fits well inside your suit coat inside breast pocket.
Nothing wrong with wanting a southern breakfast. They're great. But there is a lot wrong with eating at a cracker barrel, which is generally crappy.