I'm up for the day, going to go ask my mommy to pick out which chinos and tattersall shirt I should wear today....
The 27 Year Old Virgin - Page 29
Why is it when a man complains of a difficulty in meeting and/or sleeping with women, other men take it as an open invitation for cruel, cutting remarks? I know, because I've certainly been on the receiving end of them myself. It's this sadistic impulse that compels men to lord the fact they're having sex over men who aren't under the flimsy guise of trying to assist them.
I know you'll probably justify it by saying it's some tough-love attempt to jostle him out of his comfort zone, but getting us all to SF-Master-of-the-Universe-level-Alfa sometimes requires more than just a little jostling. Meeting and having conversations with women (or men, or children, or anyone else except the woodland friends who never judge me) requires a substructure of social skills some men have never acquired, or have ever even had a chance to acquire, or may never acquire, that is water-to-a-goldfish invisible to the dolts- well-meaning and malicious alike- who think it's jsut a matTER OF COinfiIDENCE BRAH JUS SUCK IT UP AND GO OUT THERE AND TALK TO SOME WOMIN GET SUM "LIQWID CUORAGE" D00D AND HOLA AT SUM FAT CHIKS THE"YL DO ANYTGHING BWAHAHAAH!!!
Where to start on this one?...
How about the fact that you yourself have no advice whatsoever for the kid, so are therefore less useful to the OP than either jostling or flimsy guises to the discussion?
How about the fact that for every tough-love assertion, there is an equivalent 'if you just want it out of the way, rent it' recommendation? That's kind of weak-love, don't you think? As such, there is also subsequent discussion as to whether that 1. even counts 2. meets various persons ethical standards or 3. is the right way to go about it. All of which is fair enough irrespective of which way your moral compass points.
How about the fact that for every 'suck it up brah' there is a more constructively phrased piece of 'just get out and about' recommendation that is essentially the same advice?
You then lay that off into 'well he may lack the substructure of social skills', but then, what do you recommend to acquire those? Silent nights with Styleforum to keep him warm?
If that's what he wants, hey, more power to him, I don't care, but yet the OP, in the very naming of this thread and in every post he has made, has indicated that that is exactly what he himself does not want.
If he wants those skills, he can either ask for advice of the people who do have them (which is what he has done), in which case, you take the good with the bad, at which point you either take the advice or you don't. If you choose not to, then hey, spend your nights with SF and quit whining about it.
At which point, those of whom who suggest 'out and about' (a group in which I include myself) as a first step to developing those social skills and by surrounding oneself with people who have at least one interest in common (ie. the course matter, the nature of the club, whatever), will tend to come back to his 'ya, so...SF and the gym for my birthday' post and say 'hey, you could be half way through Spanish class by now, met five dudes who you get along with, six girls from class, and have yourself the beginning of a social circle', and pointing that out does not mean we need all caps and to deliberately spell women incorrectly brah.
1. I don't run. I go to the gym and stay active, but am not a runner and don't really plan on starting.
2. Went to university in a different state and most of my college friends are on the east cost or went south.
3. I'd say my main hobbies are fashion, reading, cooking, and fitness.
4. Yep, we all get along. A couple of the guys occasionally do happy hour and I've gone with them a couple times.
He's short doesn't like fat girls and lives in texas or something Cupid is not the best option. Sadly girls on that site basically filter by some really superficial things that they don't care about in real life (height, race) and unless you're in NYC there's few good ones anyway.
Possibly match or one of the other pay sites would be much better in this case, since I gather he's actually serious about dating, as opposed to cupid which is full of bored girls looking for an ego boost or a quickie.
A quick google, says there's new to town events etc. you can go to.
For a guy who can't talk to anything except his shoelaces and cat, this shouldn't be a problem for you. Unless they're 600 pound whales. If they're 15 pounds overweight that's not that bad and will actually teach you how to talk to people.
Well, as of early tomorrow morning, I will be a 27 year old virgin.
At least I get to rock a suit tomorrow and will get my Howard Yount wool pants in the mail.
And because I have no friends, my bday plans are to get up early:
1. go to gym
2. suit up
3. go to dmv (tags expire)
4. go to work and stare at computer all day
5. leave work a couple hours early
6. head to niemen marcus or allen edmonds (need a belt or two)
7. go to whole foods and get some gelato
8. go home and sleep
Why not skip the gelato at Whole Foods for heaven's sake, go over to Williams and Graham and have a nice cocktail -- that's what I did if ever I was alone on my birthday -- found the nearest top tier cocktail bar around, dressed up, and had some good drinks. Never got hammered. Usually had some good conversations, too. Always worthwhile.