or Connect
Styleforum › Forums › General › General Chat › Things That Are Bothering You, Got You All Hibbeldy-Jibbeldy, or just downright pissed, RIGHT NOW!
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Things That Are Bothering You, Got You All Hibbeldy-Jibbeldy, or just downright pissed, RIGHT NOW! - Page 5600

post #83986 of 85764
I rarely get pissed at Mrs. Piob, and when I do I never share it with anyone, but fuck I'm getting pissed at her over the pool/yard project in a major way. She claims to really want it, I mean the single biggest expenditure (the pool) is all her baby, but when she has to lift a finger for part of the process it's like pulling fucking teeth and she gets all frosty. I've 100% taken the lead from the start, arranged site visits, going to the showroom to look at options, basically done 99% of all effort and I'm getting fucking pissed at the lack of cooperation and evaporation of motivation the moment she needs to do something active, like review the lousy three page contract too. I just told her I'm done and to either have it set up by Sept 15th or I'll cancel the project myself. Fuck, I really think I'm as pissed at her as I've ever been in 19 years.
post #83987 of 85764

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/31/home-renovations-divorce_n_3679074.html

post #83988 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

I rarely get pissed at Mrs. Piob, and when I do I never share it with anyone, but fuck I'm getting pissed at her over the pool/yard project in a major way. She claims to really want it, I mean the single biggest expenditure (the pool) is all her baby, but when she has to lift a finger for part of the process it's like pulling fucking teeth and she gets all frosty. I've 100% taken the lead from the start, arranged site visits, going to the showroom to look at options, basically done 99% of all effort and I'm getting fucking pissed at the lack of cooperation and evaporation of motivation the moment she needs to do something active, like review the lousy three page contract too. I just told her I'm done and to either have it set up by Sept 15th or I'll cancel the project myself. Fuck, I really think I'm as pissed at her as I've ever been in 19 years.

Yikes. For how long has this been boiling over?
post #83989 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by GreenFrog View Post

Yikes. For how long has this been boiling over?

Since last weekend. Apparently my "timeline" is more compressed than hers I was informed. I just want to pull the fucking trigger or put this out of my mind until next year. We have TG and Xmas plans that will get changed depending on whether we do this or not so I want to have my work schedule and personal schedule settled vs. up in the air until October. If we do this project we'll be cancelling our wine country trip so I want to make sure I get the consolation of soaking in my new spa over Xmas. Since we've been working on this for about two months I really don't think doing what it takes to have it completed by Xmas is asking for much particularly considering I've done the entire PM'ing.

Our marriage is a very relaxed one but she has me rather pissed off. I think she's conflicted, as I know she really wants it, but doesn't want to see the saving account drop like that and her foot dragging is the manifestation of it.
post #83990 of 85764

I had a friend who made a solar spa with an old horse trough and and a glass door cost $0

post #83991 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by Numbernine View Post

I had a friend who made a solar spa with an old horse trough and and a glass door cost $0

Something tells me the HOA would really love that.
post #83992 of 85764

it's funny how few projects there are in life where a married couple actually works together: raising a family, finding faith, and building a home all come to mind, altho obv not all couples do even those things together. some couples will run a business together but i think that's passing rare. otherwise lots of couples do there own thing and just sort of snack and relax together.

 

so far wifey and i have/are accomplishing 2 of the above. and by and large, it's working pretty fucking well. not by design, mind. i think it's just kinda luck of the draw.

 

fwiw, i've known plenty of architects and designers and lots of them basically won't touch residential projects because you have to engage in an insane mix of manipulation, therapy, and education to get through the projects. there are plenty who love that work, but even if you find a general contractor or architect whom you like it can be easy to poison that well. good luck with your process.

post #83993 of 85764
Women lack full faculty of reason. God allocated those points to the ability to create life. Man has been bitching about that to no avail since we lived in caves. happy.gif
post #83994 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post


Our marriage is a very relaxed one but she has me rather pissed off. I think she's conflicted, as I know she really wants it, but doesn't want to see the saving account drop like that and her foot dragging is the manifestation of it.

Does SHE know this? Express you frustrations and just tell her to decide or scrap. Communication is key. My marriage has suffered the same communication failure.
post #83995 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by SirReveller View Post

Women lack full faculty of reason. God allocated those points to the ability to create life. Man has been bitching about that to no avail since we lived in caves. happy.gif

My wife is highly reasonable and logical; it's part of what I found so attractive about her. I really think this is just an internal conflict and she's doing something she never does, namely, taking it out on me.
post #83996 of 85764
+1 on communicating

I can certainly understand your frustrations Piob. I think your wife would as well.
post #83997 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by jcman311 View Post

Does SHE know this? Express you frustrations and just tell her to decide or scrap. Communication is key. My marriage has suffered the same communication failure.

She was informed prior to my post that she either puts in the tiny efforts I'm requesting of her or this whole thing is hers. I mean, I've still got to go back to the contractor and tell them their contract is getting modified and that I want some more items tossed in for the current price or no deal. I'll get over this by dinner but at the moment I'm just a little pissed at the lack of cooperation when so little is required.
post #83998 of 85764
Ima start a wife complaint thread. 100s of SFers would save $1000s in therapy, live an extra ten years and prolly a few dodge a domestic lol. Mine has lots of positive qualities but is a real know-it-all. Subjects big and small. Really fucking annoying sometimes. I tell her her nickname should be "Well, actually" :P
post #83999 of 85764

What is "finding faith"? 

post #84000 of 85764
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by jcman311 View Post

Does SHE know this? Express you frustrations and just tell her to decide or scrap. Communication is key. My marriage has suffered the same communication failure.

She was informed prior to my post that she either puts in the tiny efforts I'm requesting of her or this whole thing is hers. I mean, I've still got to go back to the contractor and tell them their contract is getting modified and that I want some more items tossed in for the current price or no deal. I'll get over this by dinner but at the moment I'm just a little pissed at the lack of cooperation when so little is required.

Watch the ultimatum thing and dont dwell too much on whats happened already. Kindly state "Im here to take charge when you decide what you want. However, Im a little upset at the amount of time because of x, y, z. Could we expedite things along or just try next year?" Or "I went to see my divorce lawyer this morning..." smile.gif
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: General Chat
Styleforum › Forums › General › General Chat › Things That Are Bothering You, Got You All Hibbeldy-Jibbeldy, or just downright pissed, RIGHT NOW!