Hey T, sorry you're going through the TTs.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news first: Three is just as bad, maybe worse. Good news: None of it is consistent all the way through. You'll have good days and bad days, good weeks and bad weeks. It seems to come in waves.
I am sure you know this, but I'll say it anyways. Just maintain iron consistency and a united front with the Missus. She is testing and learning, learning and testing, and you have to show her where the boundaries are. Every time she beats her head against a wall she must know that there is in fact a wall there, every time, and she will learn faster, and things will calm down. Until she forgets that there was a wall there, or decides to try the other side of the room.