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The State of Black Tie: Your Observations - Page 71

post #1051 of 1418
1/24/13 at 4:43pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by recondite View Post

Uh, it is not proper form to indicate a dress code on a formal invitation for anything other than a costume ball or the like.

Informally, you can do as you wish however.

Guests should know proper attire based on the time of day. It is a sad testimony about our culture that your guests may not understand what is correct.

I don't think this is true in the U.S.

As for Europe? Well, get back to me when you turnaround your socialist decay. smile.gif

Actually, now that I think about it, the invitation to Rubinacci's 10-year anniversary party at the Italian embassy in London stipulated a dress code. But maybe that was for the benefit of his unruly American clients.
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post #1052 of 1418
1/24/13 at 4:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by recondite View Post

Uh, it is not proper form to indicate a dress code on a formal invitation for anything other than a costume ball or the like.

Informally, you can do as you wish however.

Guests should know proper attire based on the time of day. It is a sad testimony about our culture that your guests may not understand what is correct.

In the US, the mason jar is the ne plus ultra of wedding decor. This is perfectly acceptable wedding dress:
Warning: Can't be unseen! (Click to show)


It's may be a sad testimony about our culture, but it's the reality. There's no such thing as a standard, cultural dress code anymore except for in business settings. (Can't speak to other cultures.)
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post #1053 of 1418
1/24/13 at 4:56pm
There's at least one dissertation in that first photo. At least.
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post #1054 of 1418
1/24/13 at 5:39pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sugarbutch View Post

There's at least one dissertation in that first photo. At least.

The caption on the first should be: "Why cousins shouldn't fuck each other or at least they should pull out if they do"

And the second: "Guess which of the groomsmen the groom has slept with and in what order"
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post #1055 of 1418
1/24/13 at 6:02pm

LOL!

 

I can hear the thrumming of banjo music and I hope it is only in my mind.

 

The sad truth about the US, and where the rest of the world is now headed, is that people now regularly do things on the sole justification and reasoning that they can.

 

Their code is the one promoted by Anton LaVey, if you remember who he was; or, "Do as thou wilt"

 

Sad stuff.
 

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post #1056 of 1418
1/24/13 at 6:05pm
In the first of those unmentionable photos: Why would the bride even bother wearing a gown if everyone else was going to dress like that?



No joking...I was at a budget, yet sophisticated Manhattan wedding in the late 90s...no dress code was mentioned...the bride wore a cocktail dress, the groom was in a nice suit and all of the guests wore cocktail attire. Except for one guest: A woman the bride grew up with in rural Upstate New York showed up in jeans and a sweatshirt. She also brought her two young children (who were not on the invite, as it was a no-kids affair).
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post #1057 of 1418
1/24/13 at 6:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrDaniels View Post

In the first of those unmentionable photos: Why would the bride even bother wearing a gown if everyone else was going to dress like that?



No joking...I was at a budget, yet sophisticated Manhattan wedding in the late 90s...no dress code was mentioned...the bride wore a cocktail dress, the groom was in a nice suit and all of the guests wore cocktail attire. Except for one guest: A woman the bride grew up with in rural Upstate New York showed up in jeans and a sweatshirt. She also brought her two young children (who were not on the invite, as it was a no-kids affair).

Come on, give her a break. I'm sure that the kids' dad was supposed to watch them, but was picked up for cooking meth the day before.
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post #1058 of 1418
1/24/13 at 6:59pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by recondite View Post

The sad truth about the US, and where the rest of the world is now headed, is that people now regularly do things on the sole justification and reasoning that they can.

We live in an era where cleverness is valued more than quality by most people.
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post #1059 of 1418
1/24/13 at 7:48pm
Thread Starter 
Look, I'll be the first to rip an outfit to shreds, but you all are making the very ugly mistake of confusing taste in clothing for the quality of the people wearing it. The truth is that the vast majority of Americans do not pay a fraction of the attention to dress as we do on this forum. Yet, that doesn't make them all rednecks. If you think the rich and educated always know how to dress right, you clearly don't spend much time with many rich, educated people.

Don't even pretend Europe is much different. I've seen too many Europeans to believe there is much substance behind the pretentiousness.
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post #1060 of 1418
1/24/13 at 7:56pm
I think this may be the first foo.gif post I can unequivocally +1. Should I be concerned?
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post #1061 of 1418
1/24/13 at 8:11pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by mafoofan View Post

Look, I'll be the first to rip an outfit to shreds, but you all are making the very ugly mistake of confusing taste in clothing for the quality of the people wearing it. The truth is that the vast majority of Americans do not pay a fraction of the attention to dress as we do on this forum. Yet, that doesn't make them all rednecks. If you think the rich and educated always know how to dress right, you clearly don't spend much time with many rich, educated people.

Don't even pretend Europe is much different. I've seen too many Europeans to believe there is much substance behind the pretentiousness.

I've enjoyed this thread for what it is thus far, but this is probably the first post that serves as advice to live by as well and is applicable far beyond discussions of black tie dress. That said, I still find those pictures hilarious, and that hilarity goes far beyond the outfits IMO.
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post #1062 of 1418
1/24/13 at 9:38pm
The point I'm trying to make is that there is an attitude amongst many people nowadays that if everything you do isn't unique and clever and non-traditional, then you're just a boring, vanilla person. This ties back right to the point of this thread, "the state of black tie today", considering that established, rigid, "boring" dress codes like black/white tie put everyone on the same level and make no one stand out. So, if I show up to a "creative black tie" event in a one-button, peak lapel, etc. pitch-perfect black tie rig, does that mean that I'm an elitist who looks down on the fools with their polka dot bow ties and Converse sneakers? Does that mean I'm a square who doesn't know how to have a good time? And my comment as to the value of cleverness vs. quality definitely does not apply only to fashion. It applies to any "creative" endeavor.
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post #1063 of 1418
1/24/13 at 11:10pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by recondite View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by Butler View Post

Correct form (to-day):


You specify the correct dress code for the occasion (day/night etc.) and include a voucher to the local rental place for a free rental (of course the rental place are instructed to only supply correct attire, in case of guests potential requests for coloured bows etc.)


One includes the cost in the overall wedding budget.

bigstar%5B1%5D.gif

Uh, it is not proper form to indicate a dress code on a formal invitation for anything other than a costume ball or the like.

Informally, you can do as you wish however.

Guests should know proper attire based on the time of day. It is a sad testimony about our culture that your guests may not understand what is correct.


I'm sorry, but this is not correct!

One does indicate a dress code on formal invitations (as Foo experienced at the Rubinacci affair) - it is not always enough to know what to wear at the time of the day.For instance an invitation for a Black Tie event in Europe, can specify not only that, but also wheather the ladies should wear short or long dresses (intended level of formality). White Tie in some countries can be specified as "Galla" which means the best of the best (goes for uniforms and Court dress as well) a n d that if you are decorated (awarded an order or medal) the larger version should be worn.

Mind you, nothing snobbish about it - as most of the etiquette rules, they are just a guide that serves a purpose; to secure that nobody feels uncomfortable at the event, by standing out, and that the host's intended level of formality is adhered to - At a Black Tie event for example, the host is actually supposed to change into whatever a guest is wearing if showing up without a Dinner jacket - so he should not feel he is the only one - correct form in the extreme! bigstar[1].gif
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post #1064 of 1418
1/24/13 at 11:13pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sugarbutch View Post

I think this may be the first foo.gif post I can unequivocally +1. Should I be concerned?

I'm experiencing the same phenomenon. I feel confused, angry, hurt. Where is the crisis line number when you need it.
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post #1065 of 1418
1/25/13 at 2:48am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Butler View Post


I'm sorry, but this is not correct!

One does indicate a dress code on formal invitations (as Foo experienced at the Rubinacci affair) - it is not always enough to know what to wear at the time of the day.For instance an invitation for a Black Tie event in Europe, can specify not only that, but also wheather the ladies should wear short or long dresses (intended level of formality). White Tie in some countries can be specified as "Galla" which means the best of the best (goes for uniforms and Court dress as well) a n d that if you are decorated (awarded an order or medal) the larger version should be worn.

Mind you, nothing snobbish about it - as most of the etiquette rules, they are just a guide that serves a purpose; to secure that nobody feels uncomfortable at the event, by standing out, and that the host's intended level of formality is adhered to - At a Black Tie event for example, the host is actually supposed to change into whatever a guest is wearing if showing up without a Dinner jacket - so he should not feel he is the only one - correct form in the extreme! bigstar[1].gif

FACT.

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