I've been lurking on the site for a while. This post made me create an account so I could reply.
I work in an IT department of about 100 people. There are very few people in the department who have any of the qualities you describe, no one has them all:
The guy in the office to my left is a competitive biker. Slender frame, tight definition. He doesn't spend a lot on clothes, generally wears a blue button down Oxford, inexpensive slacks, and as he has a very high hairline, nearly shaved head. No glasses, no smoke, no soda, keeps a neat office. I don't like him all that much, but he does exhibit adequate social skills.
The woman on the other side of me dresses nicely (don't know from women's fashion, so I can't speak to brands), doesn't smoke or drink or run with men who do. She might fall into the no-definition body type, but for a woman, I guess that's an OK trait. She's "too fat" to be a runway model, but I'd call her skinny. Obsessively clean desk. Socially, she appears stand-offish, but I give her a pass on that, calling it insecurity rather than haughtiness.
Across from me is a well-built 40-something dude, snow white hair, frameless glasses that sit squarely on his face. Generally wears wool slacks and a neither expensive nor cheap shirt. Certainly off the shelf dresser, but never sloppy. He does drink coffee, but doesn't have a cup going all day long. Great social skills, easy-going, soft-spoken-- never heard him being rude to anyone.
Myself, I tend to wear Bonobos wool slacks, and shirts from either Territory Ahead ( they make a medium tall shirt that fits my 6'4" 190 lb. frame nicely), Charles Tyrwhitt, or Paul Frederick. I don't spend a lot on shoes-- comfortable and "sensible" as Mother would classify them. I wear my salt and pepper hair quite short and easy to manage, so I don't need to go to a salon and pay a boat load to maintain it. Out of the shower, towel dry and a dollop of pomade and I'm on my way. In the last month, I've grown out my beard again. I keep it trimmed so it's about a 2-week stubble. I love schmoozing, and think I do it well, and I don't think anyone calls me rude.
I could go on at length, but that should be enough to help dispel your sterotype of IT folk as fat, smelly, rude and crude (and all men, it seems).