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In this thread you ask how to behave in restaurants and other locations, and people who have been... - Page 23

post #331 of 481
Here's a more general question... How long are you willing to wait to get served, or between courses, before speaking to someone about it? Who do you speak to? Or do you just walk out?
post #332 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by KJT View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by impolyt_one View Post

However, I am surprised that not many people in this thread have asked much about Asian dining etiquette - there are a lot of things to know, especially with Japanese food. The order in which you pick up your chopsticks, with which hand, in what position, the proper grip for your rice bowl, proper grip for your miso soup, ways to eat sushi, this stuff isn't gonna come naturally. It would make a good impression if you were to say, go on a business trip to Japan and eat with people; eating Asian food in Asia with tourists is fun because you get to show people something new, but at the same time, table manners and the western approach to eating Asian food can be tough to watch sometimes. Korean food is a tough one to watch foreign people eat, because of the communal soups and hotpots, the admittedly difficult to use thin metal chopsticks, etc.

I think some of this is tongue in cheek, but I would actually like to know more about Asian etiquette.

Things I think I know:

Sushi should be eaten in one bite.
Don't take a piece of sushi from communal plate with the eating end of your chopsticks. Should you use the back end?
Don't make a mix of wasabi and soy and soak your sushi in it.
Slurping is not impolite.

That's about all I got. In all seriousness, can you tell me anymore?

I was at a korean place on Friday and was unsure how to handle the communal dishes and the pieces of meat that were much large than bite size. We only had out chopsticks - should I just grab what I want out of the bowl, or should I use the back or what? There were some pieces of meat that were much larger than a bite, should I bite and tear, or try to stuff the whole thing into my mouth?

I only follow sushi rules if its at a good sushiya ie only if the itamae forms it for one bite, adds proper amount of wasabi. If the fish is fresh and rich enough you shouldn't even use shoyu. and none of these rules are set in stone. Also I've never heard this one about communal plates.

Korean etiquette is imo mostly nonexistent. You just eat. If you're Korean you're expected to let elders eat first and turn away when you take your shot of soju. Also might be a good idea to dump communal soup in a personal bowl as its kinda gross to share saliva but this is in no way a universal thing.


So where do you place napkins when you leave the table momentarily?
post #333 of 481
There are formal Korean table manners (knowing where to place your left hand when eating, placement of rice/personal soup bowl in front of you, which utensil to use for which use, all are different from say, Japanese food) , but there aren't really many places where it'd be legitimately important in this day and age - maybe for the wannabe yangban types who go to eat fake Korean kaiseki at ilshik places, I don't know.

The Japanese table manners though, those are real and basic - that bit about holding your chopsticks and bowl the right way, in the right order, is no different than silverware etiquette and keeping your elbows in and low. Since Asian people often dine with people and have social hierarchies in front of them all day, it's pretty relevant and usable. I'm not saying every person knows that stuff either, but again, like western silverware etiquette...
post #334 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by indesertum View Post




So where do you place napkins when you leave the table momentarily?

On your chair.
post #335 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Van Veen View Post

Here's a more general question... How long are you willing to wait to get served, or between courses, before speaking to someone about it? Who do you speak to? Or do you just walk out?

Walk out? Why would you do that? You owe money.

Unless you were given previous notice, 15 to 20 minutes -or 10 if you gotta catch a flight. Frankly, I dont mind the wait. Restaurants now want to shove you out the door so fast you are lucky to get he last bite of your Caesar salad in before its whisked away. Unless you are in a hurry, relax.

If you want to slow down the dinner one tactic I recommend is to order some appetizers and then order the main course after you're finished with them. Then tell the waiter you'd like a break after dessert.

You've got a right to the table so dont feel pressured to leave. If you do, its fair to reflect that in the tip. Thats one of the nice things about eating in restaurants in europe, you fell like you can relax and take your time.
post #336 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by idfnl View Post

Walk out? Why would you do that? You owe money.

Not if you haven't consumed anything yet. (I was referring to the situation where you are seated by the host/hostess, and your server doesn't show for a while.)

I have no problem with waiting as long as I don't feel like I'm being ignored (empty glasses, multiple other parties who came in after being served before, etc.).
post #337 of 481
Scenario: popular upscale restaurant. If the owner greets you at the door is it permissible to give him a bro hug? If female the hug/kiss? Or you are seated for dinner and the owner comes over, permissible to stand up and give him a bro hug?
post #338 of 481
If male, give him a pound. If female offer your hand as if to kiss hers, but then kiss your own.

If you are already seated and owner approaches order jager-bombs.
post #339 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Scenario: popular upscale restaurant. If the owner greets you at the door is it permissible to give him a bro hug? If female the hug/kiss? Or you are seated for dinner and the owner comes over, permissible to stand up and give him a bro hug?

None of the above unless they are personal friends outside of the establishment.*

*Middle aged Italians are genetically predisposed for this behavior & must be treated with requisite sympathy
post #340 of 481
Known the owner and wife for years. FWIW, brohug is mandatory between us.
post #341 of 481
Experienced my first brohug just recently, took me off guard.
post #342 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Known the owner and wife for years. FWIW, brohug is mandatory between us.

I avoid at all costs. Handshake is plenty. Reminds me of the episode of Curb Your Enthusasim 2 weeks ago.

Couple of months ago at a BBQ this older lady got all loaded and was trying to give goodbye kisses right on the lips to men there. Fuck that. I gave her a head turn, she whiffed and kissed my hair. Gave me a look afterwards.

Best way to back brohuggers off is to say "well, that's affectionate". The word affectionate has solid repulsive power in this situation. I knew one guy that insisted on this shit to the point where I just told him strait that "hey, we dont need to hug man". They he proceeded to make a joke out of it every time we saw eachother "oh, I forgot, you dont like friends", whoo what a whopper.

My father has the awful habit of touching people when he talks to them. He grabs their arms and shit to emphasize his points. Puts his hand over theirs as well. Grabs forearms. I've tried to get him to stop, even embarrassed him by saying "cant you see he doent want you to touch him, stop" but fuck no, he's committed to it.
post #343 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by idfnl View Post


I avoid at all costs. Handshake is plenty. Reminds me of the episode of Curb Your Enthusasim 2 weeks ago.

Couple of months ago at a BBQ this older lady got all loaded and was trying to give goodbye kisses right on the lips to men there. Fuck that. I gave her a head turn, she whiffed and kissed my hair. Gave me a look afterwards.

Best way to back brohuggers off is to say "well, that's affectionate". The word affectionate has solid repulsive power in this situation. I knew one guy that insisted on this shit to the point where I just told him strait that "hey, we dont need to hug man". They he proceeded to make a joke out of it every time we saw eachother "oh, I forgot, you dont like friends", whoo what a whopper.

You are a prickly dood.
post #344 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post

Known the owner and wife for years. FWIW, brohug is mandatory between us.

Why don't you up it to a brochain?
post #345 of 481
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piobaire View Post


You are a prickly dood.

Yep. I'm not into unnecessary affection.
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Styleforum › Forums › Culture › Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel › In this thread you ask how to behave in restaurants and other locations, and people who have been out in public answer.