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The little horrors in life - Page 7

post #91 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by munchausen View Post
Waking up, hitting the snooze, and then dreaming that you get up, shower, get dressed and drive to work. Then waking up and realizing you have to do the whole thing again.

+1 that was an eventful morning.
post #92 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by Big A View Post
Getting food poisoning, shitting yourself at work, running out to drive home before anyone notices, getting in an accident on the way home, standing waiting for cop to finish while alternately (1) dry heaving and (2) feeling the shit dry up on your leg.

Yes, this actually happened.

Jeezus, that's terrible.
post #93 of 309
Pissing at a bar in urinals w/o dividers next to some sloppy fat fuck and getting sprayed by his urine as it bounces off the urinal.
post #94 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stazy View Post
Having to fill up with gas. I fucking hate it.

This, my god, this. It takes, what, three minutes? I still have to almost have the low fuel light to come on before I can force myself into a gas station parking lot. This is even worse when it's winter and there's a semi-legitimate reason why you wouldn't want to stand outside of your car.
post #95 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eason View Post

The second you realize you didn't fart, but you have diarrhea.

LOL

Nearly as good as a temperamental 16 year old boy and your not allowed to use your cattle prod.
post #96 of 309
holding onto the toilet seat for dear life after having a little too much to drink the previous night.

feelings for someone that aren't reciprocated. yeah yeah yeah.... fuck off. let me enjoy my misery.

stupid people. you know who you are.

-Jeff
post #97 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamelan View Post

stupid people. you know who you are.

-Jeff

Most of them don't, though, and that's a big part of the problem.
post #98 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by dcg View Post
Most of them don't, though, and that's a big part of the problem.

+1
post #99 of 309
IDing an army captain/colonel/general in uniform.

Finding out one of your favorite shirts is dirty and you have to wear something off the "backup" drawer.
post #100 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by munchausen View Post
Trying to search an ex girlfriend's name in Facebook while using your smartphone and accidentally putting her name down as a status update. Then realizing you can't delete an update from your phone.

I've had a few close encounters but nothing like this lol.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bohe View Post
People walking just slow enough to piss you off, but too fast that you'll have to speed up to overtake them.

Sometimes speeding past them works but other times you can't and then you have to make small talk. ugh I hate small talk!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Shoe fetishisisisist View Post
Letting your GF use your mobile for something whilst praying the whole time she has it in her hands that no texts come through from that little hottie you've been texting on the sly.


keep on pimpin' brotha


-accidentally invading your co-worker's "personal space"
-ending a conversation with someone you don't really want to talk to
-having a stiffy and knowing you have to get up in front of people
post #101 of 309
When you go to a bar and order a scotch and the waitress brings you a glass filled to the rim with ice with a lemon wedge in it.
post #102 of 309
Realizing you left your wallet on the train just as its doors shut and it moves on to the next stop.
post #103 of 309
-the 60 second walk from my car to the confrence room the third wednesday of every month when i'm contractually obligated to conduct a meeting on a $24 million construction project b/n the worst contractor in the state and the owner who hates them slightly less than i do.

-calling a contractor to inform them they have been overpaid due to a bust in the plans because they were not properly backchecked by the designer.

-whenever OSHA shows up on the job. especially in this economy.
post #104 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by pvrhye View Post
using a public toilet and only noticing the lack of TP when you're already committed.

I recently had this happen to me in the middle of floor-toilet outhouse in Albania. I had to wipe my ass with a damp newspaper I found, and am probably now HIV positive.

Also, peeing, thinking you're done, putting your dick back in your underwear, and then releasing a bit more.
post #105 of 309
Quote:
Originally Posted by origenesprit View Post

Also, peeing, thinking you're done, putting your dick back in your underwear, and then releasing a bit more.

This seriously sucks . Somehow I only happens when I'm not wearing dark pants, too...
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