Originally Posted by Biscotti
I don't understand why so many here are so adamant about saying 'no' to bars / restaurants, but then yes to coffee shops?
He's talking about finding life partner material. People normally go to bars to have a good time, not discuss Nietzsche. I have lots of fun at bars. I've had plenty of success at bars. I've just haven't found somebody who wants to talk about serious shit in a bar.
I never understood the whole coffee-shop-as-social-scene. For a guy who goes places by himself, it's even more brutally lonely than clubs. I don't even recall ever seeing an attractive girl in a coffee shop. Maybe I just haven't gone to the right ones.
I live in a college town, and my home base in Austin. Coffee shops are full of young, attractive people. It works the same way in coffee shops as class. Find a girl by herself, walk up, throw on your award winning smile, ask if you can sit down, introduce yourself, and start making light hearted conversation, a joke, or something similar.
Ask about the person. People love talking about themselves. Or ask a question.
I've tried befriending guys in an attempt to have a reliable group of people to go places with, but outside of a few flukish one-off outings (literally, less than five), nothing's ever stuck. I occasionally wind up at parties too, but those are usually flukish one-offs as well, and I usually end up never seeing those people again. I wouldn't even go through the effort of doing these things if it weren't for the prospect of meeting and talking to women on any sort of semi-regular basis, which I never do.
Are you awkward to be around? Do you constantly bitch about your life? Do you talk about how foreveralone you are? Do you talk about how rare it is to go out with people? If you're anything like you are on styleforum, you're probably a debbie downer. Be more fun to be around.