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Reasons (excuses) for growing a beard?

post #1 of 27
5/18/11 at 1:24pm
Thread Starter 
I never grew a full beard but maybe once in a life a man should do it! I have- already since childhood- had the (IMO: correct!) notion that many men grow beards in order to hide their unseemly, flabby facial features. In my case I could motivate myself to such an act by reminding me of its manliness or the intimitating effects (Vikings, Nordic barbarians etc.) it could have. Maybe I'll do it starting from early fall...
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post #2 of 27
5/18/11 at 2:31pm
For about 4 months this winter I was just working my ass off. No dressing up at all and working alot with my hands. How I looked became very unimportant. By the end I had quite a Grizzly Adams thing going on. IMO not a very attractive look. HAHA

Best part is I needed a new passport and got it taken before I got all cleaned up. It's pretty funny.


Still not a good look at all. But I do like to keep some stubble. Looks masculine.
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post #3 of 27
5/18/11 at 4:26pm
Thread Starter 
I always am shaving myself clean like a Roman, only when I'm sick- which hardly ever happens in recent years- do I at times leave a two- at most three-day-stubble...
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post #4 of 27
5/18/11 at 8:21pm
Reasons to have a beard:

1. You look good with a beard. (Some men look better with beards than without, that's a bonus if you're one of them)

2. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (If this were the case, I have a feeling that you wouldn't be on styleforum)

3. Women think you look good with a beard. (Sometimes a guy is ugly and just doesn't know it and women find you more attractive with a beard)

4. You're gay, but you don't want people to know. (Although, this is a different type of beard. Also, you may be a Republican Politician if this is the case)


Reasons not to have a beard:

1. You think you'll look manlier/tougher. (You won't)

2. You have a crush on Gerard Butler from 300. (Sorry, you still won't look manly/tough, also, you won't have CGI muscles)

3. To hide your unseemly flabby facial features. (You're still fat)

4. You think you're a philosopher. (Read more than one book next year, also, you're still fat)

5. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (Don't let people know how lazy you are! Damn, shave that thing everyday; just do this one thing and you can trick people! Then, you can be lazy about everything else.)

6. You ask, "Should I grow a beard?" (No, a man who deserves a beard wouldn't ask. Why do you think they're so manly and tough? Cause they asked permission or for advice from internet dress-up dolls?)

7.

8. Profit.













P.S. Disregard everything I've said, I'm just saying stupid things. Do whatever you want.
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post #5 of 27
5/18/11 at 9:05pm
Thread Starter 
Thanks! Some really excellent suggestions and excuses there, celery, although you sport some strange inverted logic at times. I esp. like dual-laziness, the philosopher-image*, or I could also go for the Monet/- painter or Marxist revolutionary one- 'fake it 'till you make it!!'...good for me that I'm neither too fat nor ugly but a very good arg. against it is the asking permission from internet dress-up dolls!, if I may be so bold to express my sympathy for your succinct assessment there. If not then I'll take it back of course.

*what have books to do with philosophers?? real phil.s dont need books they only need to live according to their philosophy, or respectively be able to write truthfully about their lives- tertium non datur!

Anyway, super post there>!
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post #6 of 27
5/18/11 at 9:09pm
Well, logic is my strong suit. In fact, I usually wear it when I interview, with cap-toe oxfords of course.
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post #7 of 27
5/18/11 at 9:49pm
I
Quote:
Originally Posted by celery View Post
Reasons to have a beard:

1. You look good with a beard. (Some men look better with beards than without, that's a bonus if you're one of them)

2. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (If this were the case, I have a feeling that you wouldn't be on styleforum)

3. Women think you look good with a beard. (Sometimes a guy is ugly and just doesn't know it and women find you more attractive with a beard)

4. You're gay, but you don't want people to know. (Although, this is a different type of beard. Also, you may be a Republican Politician if this is the case)


Reasons not to have a beard:

1. You think you'll look manlier/tougher. (You won't)

2. You have a crush on Gerard Butler from 300. (Sorry, you still won't look manly/tough, also, you won't have CGI muscles)

3. To hide your unseemly flabby facial features. (You're still fat)

4. You think you're a philosopher. (Read more than one book needy year, also, you're still fat)

5. You're so incredibly lazy that you can't be bothered to shave. (Don't let people know how lazy you are! Damn, shave that thing everyday; just do this one thing and you can trick people! Then, you can be lazy about everything else.)

6. You ask, "Should I grow a beard?" (No, a man who deserves a beard wouldn't ask. Why do you think they're so manly and tough? Cause they asked permission or for advice from internet dress-up dolls?)

7.

8. Profit.













P.S. Disregard everything I've said, I'm just saying stupid things. Do whatever you want.
I agree with all of this
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post #8 of 27
5/20/11 at 6:23am
I don't see a problem with asking for advice on beards, try growing one if you want to and if you don't like it you can just shave.

Keep in mind that it itches like a motherfuck.
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post #9 of 27
5/20/11 at 11:21am
the reason to grow a beard is to keep the lower half of your face warm as you live on the north pole and must deliver presents to children all over the world once a year in an open top sleigh.
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post #10 of 27
5/20/11 at 1:55pm
The question you will be asked most frequently is "Why are you growing it?"

You don't really know why, of course, but that's not good enough. Surely your fertile mind is up to the challenge. Generally, offering a new answer every time the question is asked will keep you in high spirits.

"Oh, it's for the centennial," will usually do. Never say which centennial.

"I've become radicalized by the government's decision to (here fill in the latest harebrained decision by the government - there are several reported in the papers each morning)."

Identity crises and masculinity problems are passe.

Explanations having to do with laziness, boredom or thrift are acceptable, but health reasons are open to dispute. Although a beard protects you from insects, sunburn and cold, it is also true that even the cleanest beard harbors germs, both nasty and benign.
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post #11 of 27
5/20/11 at 4:57pm
There was a study recently that concluded that men with beards are less trustworthy to the general public. So I grew a beard.
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post #12 of 27
5/20/11 at 5:07pm
Earlier I mentioned that some guys look better with beards. I just remembered a perfect example:

Rowan Atkinson isn't the best looking guy, but he's definitely a beard guy:

Blackadder season1.


Blackadder season2.



Not in character, but also decades apart in age.



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post #13 of 27
5/20/11 at 6:49pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by StorGladStång View Post
I don't see a problem with asking for advice on beards, try growing one if you want to and if you don't like it you can just shave.

Keep in mind that it itches like a motherfuck.

Quote:
Originally Posted by roryben View Post
There was a study recently that concluded that men with beards are less trustworthy to the general public. So I grew a beard.
Good motivating posts there, guys!

Khayembii: the few people who happen to know me, already think that I'm crazy anyway, but maybe growing a beard would be a sign to them that now I have gone over the edge for good...

celery: I like that 'Elizabethean' beard there, actually. I certainly wouldn't want a moustaccio à la General Malchett but to be honest I actually think that the typical English-officers-beard as portrayed by Darling, Blackadder or Flashheart is worth considering!
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post #14 of 27
5/20/11 at 7:32pm
Grow a beard for all those men out there who can't.
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post #15 of 27
5/20/11 at 8:27pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blurv View Post
Grow a beard for all those men out there who can't.
.!.
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