A quick update in the most active thread in the general forum...I brought up a number of things with my wife, some of them inspired by you guys:
Q: Have you thought about PPD?
A: Is this your way of making me feel bad?
Q: How do you think women used to do it when they had five kids?
A: I couldn't do it! Are you nuts?
Q: What do you think about working again?
A: Why? Why? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
In all seriousness, we found a nanny that can come a couple of days a week for about five hours a time. It sounds like a small thing, but those 10 hours are HUGE. My wife is in much better spirits. Also I'm noticing as the baby gets a little older, it's much, much easier.
There's also an element of me enjoying being with the baby more. I hate to say it but during the first few months I was barely interested. He just pooped, etc. but now that he laughs, rolls around, pulls his binkie out, etc. there's a much greater entertainment factor. Do I have free time? No. Do I enjoy my time with him more, yes.
At the end of the day though, the liberation of women has made the traditional man's role a lot less rewarding. It's not as though just because my wife is hyper educated she's somehow more intelligent than women were earlier this century, etc.
Here's another theory for you. She spend her most productive years (20s) being educated and not bearing children. I wonder if she'd be more hmmm accepting? of her position were she to have been in a mother in her twenties not thirties.