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My application for being Jet Li's PA

post #1 of 51
Thread Starter 
My brother's friend is working as a recruiter in finding a new PA for Jet Li to assist him with charity work and help him on-sets. I figured I might as well try, right?

"Dear Mr. xxxx,

I am writing to inform you of my availability to fill the position of Jet Li's personal assistant.

This is quite good news for Mr. Li, because there are not many people in China with my experience and capabilities:

- I have excellent interpersonal communication skills, fluent in Mandarin Chinese
- I am personable and good at getting-along with all kinds of people. This is especially important for Jet Li, who hasn't smiled since the 12th scene of "Once Upon a Time in China" when he meets that one girl.
- With my dynamic skills and diligent work ethic, I get things done quickly. This is demonstrated by my succint cover letter, as opposed to the many other cover letters you didn't have time to read.
- At the end of my work contract, I will betray Mr. Li and fight him to the death in a Japanese temple. His soft Wu Shu will be no match for my hard Karate style.

Thank you for your consideration, I can be reached at this email address xxxxxxxxxx or by phone at xxxxxxxx

Sincerely,
xxxxxxxx"
post #2 of 51
is this for real? love it! definitely will stand out. probably won't get the job but at least they might be hooked and want to know more instead of being bored before they even finish
post #3 of 51
Thread Starter 
Yeah, it's for real. As I said, my brother actually knows the guy (ex-wushu competitor) and said if I actually wanted the job, he'd give him a call. Still though, I don't think I would actually want the job unless the pay was amazing. Being a personal assistant must suck- I like having time to do things like work out, have friends, bang girls/things that look like girls, or squeeze in 8 hours of sleep.
post #4 of 51
Is your Mandarin really that fluent? BTW, I read that he lives in Singapore now. Or at least has citizenship there.
post #5 of 51
you can make jet join sf
post #6 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eason View Post
My brother's friend is working as a recruiter in finding a new PA for Jet Li to assist him with charity work and help him on-sets. I figured I might as well try, right? "Dear Mr. xxxx, I am writing to inform you of my availability to fill the position of Jet Li's personal assistant. This is quite good news for Mr. Li, because there are not many people in China with my experience and capabilities: - I have excellent interpersonal communication skills, fluent in Mandarin Chinese - I am personable and good at getting-along with all kinds of people. This is especially important for Jet Li, who hasn't smiled since the 12th scene of "Once Upon a Time in China" when he meets that one girl. - With my dynamic skills and diligent work ethic, I get things done quickly. This is demonstrated by my succint cover letter, as opposed to the many other cover letters you didn't have time to read. - At the end of my work contract, I will betray Mr. Li and fight him to the death in a Japanese temple. His soft Wu Shu will be no match for my hard Karate style. Thank you for your consideration, I can be reached at this email address xxxxxxxxxx or by phone at xxxxxxxx Sincerely, xxxxxxxx"
Well done sir
post #7 of 51
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kent Wang View Post
Is your Mandarin really that fluent?

BTW, I read that he lives in Singapore now. Or at least has citizenship there.

Yup, went from not that good about 9 months ago to fluent as a result of living on my own and most of my friends not speaking English.

Quote:
Originally Posted by acidboy View Post
you can make jet join sf

He's small, I'm sure he has a lot of his clothes made bespoke. If not, he should.
post #8 of 51
^ looks like he buys/orders a lot of stuff from shanghai tang
post #9 of 51
Haha it stands out from the rest of the applicants I believe.

Keep us posted how it turns out!
post #10 of 51
You do realize that he'll need to test you in hand-to-hand combat as the final part of your interview, right? In order to truly know someone, you must fight him. In all seriousness, though, being a PA sucks ballsack. You're basically a moderately paid slave. But the upside can be quite good, depending on whom you're slaving for. If Jet Li has a production company, for instance, the PA path is probably a decent road to eventually landing a cushy job there as an exec. Plenty of my friends in LA subjected themselves to the unique rung of hell that is being an actor's or director's PA, and those who survived are now VPs at studios and production houses. It's about four years of abject misery, followed by a lifetime of reward.
post #11 of 51
Thread Starter 
I don't think I could give up 4 of the prime years of my life, especially since it isn't even a job/career I'd enjoy... Well, it never hurts to have options.
post #12 of 51
Doesn't someone like Jet Li have groupies?
post #13 of 51
Thread Starter 
These are the job responsibilities:
Quote:
Serve as primary communication bridge between Jet and various personal and business relations; Arrange travel and scheduling; Maintain personal and business accounts; Execute public relations strategies; Review and prepare film production materials. Responsibilities also include maintaining relationships and partnerships with multinational corporations, government and religious dignitaries, and media/film/public relations entities in the USA, Europe, and Asia. Candidate must be willing to travel with Jet, often at short notice and potentially for long durations, and must bring great organizational skills and a flexible attitude. With disaster relief as one of the foundation's focus areas, travel to harsh and inconvenient locations may sometimes be required. During film productions, the candidate will accompany Jet on set and will gain hands-on production-related experience.
I don't know if groupies can do that for him.
post #14 of 51
uh you should do that job. that job is awesome. fuck being some lame ass asian gym teacher.
post #15 of 51
Thread Starter 
Why don't you do the job then, lame ass 'murkan student.
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