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Wedding Attire - need help!

mjphillips

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Hello everyone, I've been a browser of the forum here for awhile, but this is my first post here. I've read many of the previous threads on wedding attire and bespoke suiting but I would still like to seek opinions here. I'm getting married in mid-September in Virginia and cannot decide the ideal attire. Here are the pertinent details:

-ceremony & reception will be outdoors, at a small horse farm ~1 hr from DC
-ceremony just before sunset (~6:30pm)
-mid-September, so post Labor Day but technically still Summer
-semi-formal gown & bridesmaid dresses in navy & coral

Originally wedding was going to be in early June and we were thinking blue blazer/white pants or something like that. I'm still considering this, but the new post Labor day date and southern tradition of black tie weddings has me reconsidering. I should add that I read the Manton piece and like the idea of morning coats but I don't have one (nor does anyone I know) and I'd prefer not to go the rental route. I also wonder if morning coats would be appropriate since 90% of the event will be at night, plus it is a sort of dated look, at least in the US. And for that matter is black tie appropriate since it will be daylight during the outdoor ceremony? Not to mention it will likely be kind of hot. (I should also add that myself, the groomsmen, and most of the guests own tuxedos so the potential financial burden with black tie is low.)

Lastly, I'm kind of prejudiced against lounge suits for a wedding - my job is somewhat formal, and while I typically enjoy wearing suits they just imply business for me and I think the occasion deserves something more festive. I think my mind could be changed on this point though, I saw a thread on here suggesting a navy SB peak lapel suit with a DB vest, an appealing rec.

So I have put a little thought into this, but can come up with pros & cons for all the different options. Would love to hear what yall have to say. Thanks.
 

GBR

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Decent lounge suits would be preferable: Evening dress really is not suitable for weddings however American it now is.

If you really feel lounge suits are too work like, my sympathy. Surely you can get yourslef one which is new and unsullied by such use?
 

Aldehyde

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It's really up to you, but white pants / blue blazer sounds very informal for a wedding.

I can't really speak to the 'rules' of a wedding, but in my own opinion black tie would be fine since it will basically be dusk when you start the ceremony.
 

JLibourel

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I would second the recommendation for black-tie semi-formal attire given the hour.

A blue blazer and white pants strike me as awfully "nautical" for a wedding conducted at a horse farm. For a beachfront wedding or one conducted on the deck of a sailing vessel, I think it would make an excellent ensemble.
 

mjphillips

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Originally Posted by GBR
Decent lounge suits would be preferable: Evening dress really is not suitable for weddings however American it now is.

If you really feel lounge suits are too work like, my sympathy. Surely you can get yourslef one which is new and unsullied by such use?


First time i've heard that black tie isn't suitable for a wedding; it's commonplace in the US, especially the south. I've been to probably 30 weddings and ~70% have been black or white tie. My main concern with it was due to the wedding reception being outdoors. Not completely against a suit, just is less common.

Originally Posted by Aldehyde
It's really up to you, but white pants / blue blazer sounds very informal for a wedding.

I see where you are coming from, though at beach/country weddings you see plenty of blazers, cotton suits, seersucker, etc in wedding parties. Could be a relatively new trend (last 10 years or so), so maybe could look dated or far too casual 10 years from now?

Originally Posted by JLibourel
A blue blazer and white pants strike me as awfully "nautical" for a wedding conducted at a horse farm.

Ha good point, I grew up near the water so maybe trying to bring some of that with me!
 

JLibourel

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Originally Posted by mjphillips
First time i've heard that black tie isn't suitable for a wedding; it's commonplace in the US, especially the south. I've been to probably 30 weddings and ~70% have been black or white tie. My main concern with it was due to the wedding reception being outdoors. Not completely against a suit, just is less common.

I think the problem is that a great many people wear black-tie ensembles for daytime weddings, when it really is inappropriate. Since yours is an evening wedding, it is quite appropriate.
 

TimelesStyle

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If you want to do black tie but want it to be a bit less formal, given the setting, why not do an ivory dinner jacket? However, I don't see anything wrong with an all black tuxedo either.
 

mjphillips

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Originally Posted by TimelesStyle
If you want to do black tie but want it to be a bit less formal, given the setting, why not do an ivory dinner jacket? However, I don't see anything wrong with an all black tuxedo either.

Good idea....my only concern would be that it would be too late in the season for an ivory dinner jacket? A few days before the official end of summer, but post-Labor day. Also - am I right in thinking that one-button SB shawl lapel is the standard for ivory jackets?
 

Lord Asquith

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Originally Posted by GBR
Decent lounge suits would be preferable: Evening dress really is not suitable for weddings however American it now is.

If you really feel lounge suits are too work like, my sympathy. Surely you can get yourslef one which is new and unsullied by such use?



Since you have a tuxedo then just wear that. No need to buy anything just for the wedding. You can also wear a dark navy suit, silver tie, black shoes etc
Cutaways are not wore for afternoon or evening weddings.
and btw, a lounge suit means a double breasted and you don't want to wear that to a wedding esp. in the evening.
 

Not Ed Harris

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Originally Posted by GBR
Decent lounge suits would be preferable: Evening dress really is not suitable for weddings however American it now is.

I'd have to disagree with you there. With the ceremony at 6:30pm morning dress is not appropriate and that leaves you with either lounge suit (which you might not think is formal enough) or evening dress (which is more than acceptable).
 

mjphillips

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1. If I go the navy suit route, is a solid white shirt the only appropriate choice?

2. Can anyone rec a place to have a look at some ivory dinner jackets? Brook & Ralph Lauren come to mind, curious where else would have a good selection? I live in NYC btw.
 

TheFoo

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Morning coats on a horse farm would be ridiculous. But then, so would a line-up of men wearing blazers and white trousers who aren't singing a capella on a college campus. Please do yourself a favor and avoid making your wedding a costume party.

Lounge suits make sense in this case. Just don't match them or make your groomsmen wear matching accessories. Have them dress to a standard, not a list of requirements. If they don't have the things necessary for the standard you'd like them to dress to, provide them. If you can't afford that, than realize it may not be practical for you to dress to the standard you'd envisioned.
 

TheFoo

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Originally Posted by mjphillips
1. If I go the navy suit route, is a solid white shirt the only appropriate choice?

2. Can anyone rec a place to have a look at some ivory dinner jackets? Brook & Ralph Lauren come to mind, curious where else would have a good selection? I live in NYC btw.


1. White shirts are more formal than blue and also tend to look better at night. If you want everyone to be a tad more formal, tell them to wear white shirts.

2. Ivory dinner jacket don't make any sense on a horse farm. You will also wind up dressed more formal than the bride's side of the wedding party.
 

SkinnyGoomba

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Basically, though you'll want to go with french cuffs and wear a wedding tie. A nice linen pocket square would also help separate it from your work wear when wearing a suit. Given the time of day I'd go for black tie, traditional and not the cummerbund matching the bridesmaids BS. Foo makes a good point, I'd probably get married in a navy suit and switch into a tuxedo for the party. IMO, if you dont mind I'd like to point out that those bridesmaids colors, much like most that I see today are making me cringe. Navy? come on now, it's a wedding. I can't wait for this trend of high school prom satins to pass. With ivory, cream, champagne, rose, ect available it's hard to chose a dark color and let them chose a color within that spectrum without them being all the same dress. If your groomsmen are all wearing tuxes let them chose different lapel styles, and shirt styles for a little variety. If you are wearing a pleated front, let them chose a bib front, pleated, hidden placket, ect. A little variety is much better than the bridal uniform being sold at formal wear places around the country that are better suited to proms. example:
pPOLO2-9494804_standard_v360x480.jpg
pPOLO2-9494813_standard_v360x480.jpg
much better than:
Bridesmaids_Gowns-1.jpg
 

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