i have a feeling i'm gonna catch all sorts of hell for this, BUT - how abouta Group Hug for the Stitch.
cummon, everybody in . . . . hug it out
Stitchy, when I critique something, I assume sometimes the optimal choices are not possible due to a limited wardrobe - heck, it happens to me often. The critique is not meant to say "you should have picked different stuff from your closet", but rather "this is the direction you should head in, so you know what to buy next". The advice is aimed at helping to build a versatile, interchangeable wardrobe. If you happen to have the "required" items already, then perfect! But if not, it's fine, just keep the suggestions in mind
Take what I said about your blue shirts as an example - I said you need lighter shirts, but that doesn't mean you should go and bleach your current shirts - wear them with pride, they look great and much better than 99% of what you see on the streets. But I'm sure next time you are in the market for a blue shirt, you will look for something lighter - and that will be a great choice.
Stitchy, I think you have a point, and I think it all boils down to manners. HF is right - no point putting up pics on the internet if you're going to be upset by what some bored and lonely basement-masturbator might say about them. There are always going to be lower types who use their anonymity to vent whatever life frustrations they have, and say unpleasant things they would not dare say to a human being in real life. The best thing to do with those is laugh them off or ignore them - if you recognise such outbursts as the expressions of insecurity they are, they won't bother you so much.
But after all, this particular forum is supposed to be about gentlemanly style. It seems to me you're just calling for a more gentlemanly tone, especially when feedback is negative: naturally the first to jump in are those who already have good manners - like Dr Holdfast and Senor Diaz. Others will follow, and some will never get it at all. At the end of the day this is the internet, and people use it for all sorts of things. More manly and accomplished people treat others respectfully, even if they have something difficult to say - just as they would in real life. Others will live a fantasy of shameless rudeness for reasons that Dr HF might be better able to analyse, and never change.
It doesn't really matter. Most people are pleasant enough. The thing to remember is that those who aren't, are showing only their own social shortcomings. If someone does blurt out something deliberately offensive, it's most polite to ignore it, like if someone new accidentally farts during his first board meeting. It's not pleasant, but a gentleman with any style would just pretend he hadn't heard it, and carry on. :)
These kinds of critiques don't really bother me -- and I can sympathize with your objection -- but I see them as suggestions that put principles into practice. I tend to give them a fair bit, too, because I'd rather say "This would be better if the tie had more texture" than "that tie is wrong." I find that the most helpful feedback is the kind that offers a suggestion, rather than just an objection. There are times when it crosses over into things that read as a sheer lack of sympathy, but I try to be careful about that. Also, the rudest advice is also often pretty bad, so there's that.
Unrelated, but I don't think you're an "idiot" for not going for a solid blue shirt. Heck, it came close to working, and if I had the same items in my closet, I probably would have tried them together as well.
That said, time to open up to some abuse. Most of you are enjoying your wintery tweeds, flannels and balmoral boots (with galoshes of course) in the snow, and I have to say it looks awesome. Butit's a pleasant 27C here. So it's 8.5oz Super 130s, a summery shirt and canvas spectators for me. Maybe I'll get to roll out the tweed and Dainite once this winter if I travel, but for now this is the way.
Warning: Unseasonal Shoes (Click to show)