1. head over to home depot
2. pick up some illegal laborers
3. wait for them to finish their hard and honest work for the day
4. go back inside and pretend to make some "fresh lemonade"
5. call the ICE
6. watch them run
7. repeat step 1-6 until your mansion is in proper care
a flat front kilt aka. skirt is way better with your built. pleated kilts just scream scottish IT middle management...