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Crazy self-pleasuring methods

post #1 of 13
3/22/11 at 8:31am
Thread Starter 
What is the wackiest technique you've ever used to get yourself off? The Stranger? Autofellatio (pics or it didn't happen)? Dressing up in lingerie, hanging yourself, and then beating yourself with a bullwhip?

Discuss here.

For example: I had a college roommate who used to hump a certain pillow and would not even fathom the idea of usinf his hand the old-fashioned way. That pillow must have been disgusting (and crisp!) after a few years of use.
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post #2 of 13
3/22/11 at 11:12am
the baggie, the indian burn and the little mermaid comes to mind...
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post #3 of 13
3/22/11 at 11:20am
Leather couch with a velvet dick hole!
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post #4 of 13
3/22/11 at 11:30am
.... self censored ...
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post #5 of 13
3/22/11 at 11:37am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Don Carlos View Post
What is the wackiest technique you've ever used to get yourself off? The Stranger? Autofellatio (pics or it didn't happen)? Dressing up in lingerie, hanging yourself, and then beating yourself with a bullwhip?

Discuss here.

For example: I had a college roommate who used to hump a certain pillow and would not even fathom the idea of usinf his hand the old-fashioned way. That pillow must have been disgusting (and crisp!) after a few years of use.

Why are you telling us about your roommate and not about yourself?
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post #6 of 13
3/22/11 at 1:01pm
And we still have posters here who deny their narcissism.
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post #7 of 13
3/22/11 at 1:11pm
I knew a farmboy who would get the calves to suck his cock, or so he claimed.
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post #8 of 13
3/22/11 at 1:16pm
choking is scary....my mom knew a family whos son died this way when he was about 14. found him in the shower dead with a cord around his neck. Good grief, what happened to the good ole fashined standy by of a dry handsky or a hooker??
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post #9 of 13
3/22/11 at 1:19pm
i have no elaborate methods...just good old fashion meat beating
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post #10 of 13
3/22/11 at 9:13pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by harryx2 View Post
Why are you telling us about your roommate and not about yourself?

Because I'm fairly traditional, at least as far as mechanical technique is concerned. I'm something of a connoisseur of freaky and wildly varying genres of porn, so that's where the kink comes into play. But as for the physical act, I prefer the classic method of circle-hand-around-dong-and-beat-up-and-down.
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post #11 of 13
3/22/11 at 10:31pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Don Carlos View Post
For example: I had a college roommate who used to hump a certain pillow...

Quote:
Originally Posted by harryx2 View Post
Why are you telling us about your roommate and not about yourself

Gosh, you fell for it
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post #12 of 13
3/22/11 at 11:45pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by razl View Post
Gosh, you fell for it
Yeah, I half figured he was going for the sarcastic "oh, your 'roommate'" joke, but his phrasing was terrible if so. That's on him, man. There's not getting it, and then there's an "it" that's so poorly worded as to make itself lost.
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post #13 of 13
3/29/11 at 3:05am
Just call up an ex-gf you hate, hold your nose, and get it over with.

That, or pull a Car Wash and pick up a cashier.
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