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I think I just lost a fight. - Page 7

post #91 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by JLibourel View Post
If a woman freely engages in behavior that verges on orgiastic, gets blotto and then suffers sexual indignities, she has only herself to blame, in my book anyway. Yeah, the guy was wrong to have copped a feel, but the girl is lucky nothing worse happened to her.

I am glad to hear you now feel you were not humiliated in the physical encounter. I'm sure it will do much for your self-esteem.

i dont exactly agree with this. lingerie parties are just themes people throw like bathing suit parties etc. i dont think it gives any one more of a right to do anything sexually then any other time. all of these parties no matter the theme are just slut fests anyway, so the lingierie doesnt really make much of a difference. so her being passed out in lingerie doesnt really make it any more ok. its pretty much saying its ok for guys to cop feels on girls dressed like sluts in clubs etc. its pretty wrong.
post #92 of 183
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by JLibourel View Post
If a woman freely engages in behavior that verges on orgiastic, gets blotto and then suffers sexual indignities, she has only herself to blame, in my book anyway. Yeah, the guy was wrong to have copped a feel, but the girl is lucky nothing worse happened to her.

I am glad to hear you now feel you were not humiliated in the physical encounter. I'm sure it will do much for your self-esteem.

There was no "orgiastic" behavior. (I had no idea that was a real word. Wow.) Of course, nobody should ever get "blotto", as you say, especially a girl in her situation. Not a good idea, but also not okay for a guy to actually physically insert his fingers into her. And yes, she is indeed fortunate that nothing worse happened to her.

As for not being humiliated in my physical encounter...you're probably right. It won't be bad for my self-esteem.
post #93 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by West24 View Post
i dont exactly agree with this. lingerie parties are just themes people throw like bathing suit parties etc. i dont think it gives any one more of a right to do anything sexually then any other time. all of these parties no matter the theme are just slut fests anyway, so the lingierie doesnt really make much of a difference. so her being passed out in lingerie doesnt really make it any more ok. its pretty much saying its ok for guys to cop feels on girls dressed like sluts in clubs etc. its pretty wrong.

I hope no one is trying to blame the victim, but many girls in college seem to have forgotten that they need to protect themselves. Going to a highly sexualized environment and then getting hammered, especially to the point of blacking out, is just stupid.

Doing whatever you want and then placing blame after the fact is really just not a good (or safe) way to live. Yes, morally and legally the guy would be 100% to blame. Practically..well, that's another story. You can't control other people, you can control what situations you put yourself into.
post #94 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by mehhhh View Post
Regardless of how stupid/not stupid my actions were, some people on here need to understand... If you do something sexually to a girl that later makes her cry, you deserve whatever punishment you get.
No, you deserve to stay a virgin for thinking like that bro. You never been with a chick getting rid of her v-card? They ALL cry during or after. Your white knight BS doesn't fool anybody dude especially when you combine it with this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by mehhhh View Post
Recently I've been talking to people and trying to piece together what happened. People have been very surprised when I tell that that I think I lost. I hit the guy hard once, with a left hook, in the jaw/ear area, one of his friends pulled me down from behind, I got up and threw a beer, and that was it. I threw 3 or 4 punches and he threw none. The only reason I thought I'd lost was because i'm a tool that white knighted after driving drunk because I didn't score with the chick I drove home / was hoping I'd be remembered as a hero but now everybody knows I'm a tool instead and the chick was too drunk to even remember and if we call the cops she'll probably recall ME feeling her up.
fixed it for you. Look brah, there are always 1 or 2 of you at any party. The guy to stand up super indignant whenever someone else apparently does something wrong, expecting someone to throw you a medal, meanwhile everybody else thinks you're hard on the phaggytime and a d-bag. Chill dude, she was drunk, the other dude was drunk, you were drunk/buzzed/had a few (and driving). Work on your own game, don't get all bent into knots because some other dude did what you are probably thinking about doing half the time.
post #95 of 183
^Well said! On reflecting on this, a good many women will burst into tears in the course of the act, not merely when they are losing their pucellage. I can recall one woman, a few years my senior, who had been relieved of her maidenhood about 30 years previously, who suddenly started weeping right as we were going at...just from the intensity of the experience. It was certainly very, very consensual.
post #96 of 183
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gibonius View Post
I hope no one is trying to blame the victim, but many girls in college seem to have forgotten that they need to protect themselves. Going to a highly sexualized environment and then getting hammered, especially to the point of blacking out, is just stupid.

Doing whatever you want and then placing blame after the fact is really just not a good (or safe) way to live. Yes, morally and legally the guy would be 100% to blame. Practically..well, that's another story. You can't control other people, you can control what situations you put yourself into.

Agreed. Normally, I think I would have been more upset with the girl in this situation. I don't hold her drunken state against her because 1) Somebody brought her a 4loko. I remember the first time I drank one of those, too, and it wasn't pretty, so I had some sympathy. 2) She hadn't consumed any alcohol since New Years. 3) It was, afterall, her 21st birthday.

If this had been one of my regular group of girls that I party with who are all 24 and experienced regular drinkers, I would have definitely been upset with them as well as the guy. I think this particular girl's age and inexperience/perceived innocence contributed to my rage.

Quote:
Originally Posted by CrackBaby View Post
No, you deserve to stay a virgin for thinking like that bro. You never been with a chick getting rid of her v-card? They ALL cry during or after. Your white knight BS doesn't fool anybody dude especially when you combine it with this:



fixed it for you.

Look brah, there are always 1 or 2 of you at any party. The guy to stand up super indignant whenever someone else apparently does something wrong, expecting someone to throw you a medal, meanwhile everybody else thinks you're hard on the phaggytime and a d-bag. Chill dude, she was drunk, the other dude was drunk, you were drunk/buzzed/had a few (and driving). Work on your own game, don't get all bent into knots because some other dude did what you are probably thinking about doing half the time.

My friend doesn't like you. I don't like you either.
post #97 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by mehhhh View Post
I chose to drive 10 blocks while somewhat intoxicated to get a girl out of a bad situation and I won't apologize for it. I chose to hit a guy who touched her, a guy I knew wouldn't face any other consequences, and I won't apologize for that, either. t.
Maybe I missed all the posts in which people urged you to apologize? What was the bad situation? Being drunk at a party? Because as i read your original post you didn't know the backstory until after you left with her. Also, I obviously don't know what part of town you were in, but I've been to Columbia. The city blocks aren't all that long. I have easily walked more than ten blocks to and from dinner in the evening there. Walking her home might have been a better option than driving if it was her welfare you were most concerned about?
post #98 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by lawyerdad View Post
I have easily walked more than ten blocks to and from dinner in the evening there. Walking her home might have been a better option than driving if it was her welfare you were most concerned about?

you wouldn't understand man, how's he gonna convince the chick to leave with him if they're just walking. he'll never get laid that way....

seriously if she wasn't barfing so much or obviously upset you know what he was thinking anyways.
post #99 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by mehhhh View Post

My friend doesn't like you. I don't like you either.

good thing for me you fight like a girl then ain't it brah
post #100 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrackBaby View Post
good thing for me you fight like a girl then ain't it brah

Haha, good one brah.
post #101 of 183
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by lawyerdad View Post
Maybe I missed all the posts in which people urged you to apologize?
What was the bad situation? Being drunk at a party? Because as i read your original post you didn't know the backstory until after you left with her.

Also, I obviously don't know what part of town you were in, but I've been to Columbia. The city blocks aren't all that long. I have easily walked more than ten blocks to and from dinner in the evening there. Walking her home might have been a better option than driving if it was her welfare you were most concerned about?

I think her being drunk to the extent that she was at the party was a bad enough situation. I took her to her friend's apartment, where she was spending the night (she doesn't live in Columbia, not sure this was mentioned.) She asked me to do this, wasn't my idea. I didn't know the situation until I left with her, true, but I did know that she had been locked in a bathroom with this guy and that she would be better off in a bed in a quiet location with her close friends whom I trust looking after her.

She couldn't walk, or that would have been a good idea. We had to carry her to the car. It was a 2 minute drive each way.
post #102 of 183
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrackBaby View Post
good thing for me you fight like a girl then ain't it brah

You're supposed to say 'take it easy' and then Obi Wan cuts my arm off with a lightsaber. Stick to the script.
post #103 of 183
Quote:
Originally Posted by CrackBaby View Post
you wouldn't understand man, how's he gonna convince the chick to leave with him if they're just walking. he'll never get laid that way.... seriously if she wasn't barfing so much or obviously upset you know what he was thinking anyways.
i read Superfreakonomics and so I happen to know this is bad advice. On a per kilometer traveled basis, they are actually likely to cause more harm to themselves (but less to others) by walking home drunk than driving.
post #104 of 183
Never hit anybody with your hands.
post #105 of 183
I'm still curious how you know she was fingered or not. Did you find a ring up there? Unless you say it happen she could be lying. What's her motivation for lying. Well maybe she does'nt want people to know that she got wasted and was then finger banged by some random dude. This story just does'nt sound right. Oh and who gets smashed off of the new lokos, that shits weak sauce.
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