Originally Posted by LabelKing
You'll have to be an avowed Christian first.
God fearing? Are you serious? Have you seen the size of that guy? Man, if he got pissed off, he could mess my sh*t up in a second!
Hell yeah I'm afraid. He tears the roofs off houses, smites people, and juggles lighting bolts with his bare hands. Not to mention he's the only guy I know who can knock a man unconcious, remove a RIB, I mean like cut that thing right out of his body, and make a whole other person out of it. I mean, thats some guerilla cloning crap if I've ever seen it. Totally on par with those Chinese black market organ thieves.
I heard that one time, he told this dude to take his first-born son up on top of a mountain, and then commanded him to kill his son. I mean, seriously... the guy was about to do it, cause God is a scary S.O.B. and then just as he was about to get all crazy and stab his son to death with a knife, God was all " Naw dude, I was just joking. It was like totally a test". That is COLD. The man has a twisted sense of humor, ice water in his veins, and a penchant for rolling through hoods with a posse carrying flaming swords.
Plus I'm pretty sure he stole my lunch money once.
Does being a Quaker count? I'm officially one of those.