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Living with your GIRLFRIEND - Page 4

post #46 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by RSS View Post
How on earth does living with someone ruin your credit score. Don't you maintain separate accounts? I don't even have a joint checking account with my wife ... after 30+ years.

Most people are missing the digits you have in your account. I know a lot of people maintain just one bank account.
post #47 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by RSS View Post
No. Nor do I want to know about it.

Really? I'm pretty sure that would devastate me.
post #48 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by otc View Post
Seems to me like it would be a bad idea not to live with your girlfriend before you get married...what are we going to suggest next? Not having sex with the girl before marrying her? Not even meeting her before marrying her?

I can see the virtue in not moving in with a girl who you don't think you are going to marry...but if you think you are going to end up with her, it seems like you might want to try it out *before* the wedding.

Stats actually show that divorce rate is higher among those that live together first than those that don't. It's hard to say though... There may be cultural issues at play in those numbers, for example, indians won't live together before marriage, but divorce is almost verboten (more so in India than here). In general, couples that don't cohabitate before marriage might be more traditional and put in more effort to making it work.

Still, most problems don't start with cohabitation imo. THE major reason for divorce is fighting about money. When you're just living together, you're basically just living with a roommate that has sex with you; money is otherwise kept separate, generally speaking. Until you start co-mingling funds and fighting for your right to spend $1500 at Edward Green vs. redecorating, the friction is kept to a minimum.
post #49 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by RSS View Post
How on earth does living with someone ruin your credit score. Don't you maintain separate accounts? I don't even have a joint checking account with my wife ... after 30+ years.

One person signs the lease but can't afford it on their own. Chick moves out. Late payments begin.
post #50 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by deadly7 View Post
Most people are missing the digits you have in your account. I know a lot of people maintain just one bank account.
I did this even when I was young ... with many fewer digits.
post #51 of 74
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
Really? I'm pretty sure that would devastate me.
This is why he doesn't want to know about it.
post #52 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by TyCooN View Post
This is why he doesn't want to know about it.
Thank you.

I doubt there is any great amount of promiscuity at play here ... but as I said ... I don't want to know about it ... and I don't dwell on it.
post #53 of 74
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by RSS View Post
Thank you.

I doubt there is any great amount of promiscuity at play here ... but as I said ... I don't want to know about it ... and I don't dwell on it.
Aren't you scared of the AIDS?
post #54 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by harvey_birdman View Post
Unless you are poor and need to save money on rent, why would you want to do this?

Exactly.
post #55 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by christinedaae View Post
I have, one of those, the greatest man alive fathers, the guy in the commercial. My dad so pimp it's ridiculous. While I was raised by my mom, my dad was in my life, I saw him everyday, and my dad had a way with the ladies, and he sat me down and explained to me at an earl age growing up, how things really work with the opposite sex, not what the media wants you to think of what women want you to believe.

The two most important things he told me are 1. do not get married until you are at least 30 or else you are short changing yourself and 2. I don't care how good a girl's you know what is, I don't care how close you are to getting married, I don't care if you are sleeping over every night, until you are married, keep your own place. At the very least, let her move in with you, do not get a place together, and do not move in with her.

Over the years, I have understood why

1. the second you move in, you are done for as far as sex. Se knows you can't go out and bang someone else, and now she doesn't have to bang you as often. Having your own place allows options.

2. More than anything, it's leverage You move into her. You don't like the way she's treating you or you don't like something she did, you can only take your argument, to a certain level, because she can, and will tell you to GTFO. If you get a place together, you are going to be asked to leave before she does. And you don't' want to do the living with my ex thing while she's going out banging someone else. You need to have the ability to kick her out or leave. I don't care how inconvenient it is,l I don't care how much money it can save you by shacking up.


When I was 22 years old, I was dating this girl, we had been dating for 9 months. she had slowly but shortly moved in. She was 26. Smokin hot bod. I liked her alot, so I didn't mind. She went out with her older sister every Thursday and honestly, I didn't care, because I could spend time doing my thing.

so one Thursday, 1am comes, she isn't home. club closes at 12:30. 2 comes, she isn't home. 3 come she isn't home. I fall asleep. I hear her trying to creep in the bed at 4:30am. I wake her up and confront her on it, and the hone rings and some dude is on the phone looking for her. I don't say 2 words at that point, wake up, put all her shit in a bag and tell her to get lost, had the locks changed. No muss no fuss, no drama, GTFO. No awkwardness, no withholding of sex and stuff, no worrying about trying to find a place now, etc.

There is no scenerio ere it's okay for a guy not to have his own place until the day he is married. When you are married, okay obviously.

+100000000000000000000000000000000.

You and your Dad are extremely extremely wise!!
post #56 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by jfclarky View Post
After two years $20k later an 2.5k ring i'm getting married, these women are very expensive.

You haven't seen anything yet :-)
post #57 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by TyCooN View Post
This is why he doesn't want to know about it.

But allowing it means he must know it's going on... that's messed up.
post #58 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
But allowing it means he must know it's going on... that's messed up.

She allows it too though, which probably works out pretty damned well for the guy given his lifestyle. It's way easier for a guy to have a mistress than for a woman to have a boytoy or whatever you want to call it.
post #59 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by GQgeek View Post
It's way easier for a guy to have a mistress than for a woman to have a boytoy or whatever you want to call it.
Why do you say that? The latter is becoming more acceptable socially.
post #60 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
But allowing it means he must know it's going on... that's messed up.
There is a difference between acknowledging a truth and being faced with a particular instance thereof. One is an idea, the other an experience. For example, I enjoy eating meat and know that animals have to die for my enjoyment. However, I would not want to watch a live animal be slaughtered and turned into steaks I can then buy. Nor would I want to spend time with an animal that will end up on my plate.
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