Originally Posted by christinedaae
I have, one of those, the greatest man alive fathers, the guy in the commercial. My dad so pimp it's ridiculous. While I was raised by my mom, my dad was in my life, I saw him everyday, and my dad had a way with the ladies, and he sat me down and explained to me at an earl age growing up, how things really work with the opposite sex, not what the media wants you to think of what women want you to believe.
The two most important things he told me are 1. do not get married until you are at least 30 or else you are short changing yourself and 2. I don't care how good a girl's you know what is, I don't care how close you are to getting married, I don't care if you are sleeping over every night, until you are married, keep your own place. At the very least, let her move in with you, do not get a place together, and do not move in with her.
Over the years, I have understood why
1. the second you move in, you are done for as far as sex. Se knows you can't go out and bang someone else, and now she doesn't have to bang you as often. Having your own place allows options.
2. More than anything, it's leverage You move into her. You don't like the way she's treating you or you don't like something she did, you can only take your argument, to a certain level, because she can, and will tell you to GTFO. If you get a place together, you are going to be asked to leave before she does. And you don't' want to do the living with my ex thing while she's going out banging someone else. You need to have the ability to kick her out or leave. I don't care how inconvenient it is,l I don't care how much money it can save you by shacking up.
When I was 22 years old, I was dating this girl, we had been dating for 9 months. she had slowly but shortly moved in. She was 26. Smokin hot bod. I liked her alot, so I didn't mind. She went out with her older sister every Thursday and honestly, I didn't care, because I could spend time doing my thing.
so one Thursday, 1am comes, she isn't home. club closes at 12:30. 2 comes, she isn't home. 3 come she isn't home. I fall asleep. I hear her trying to creep in the bed at 4:30am. I wake her up and confront her on it, and the hone rings and some dude is on the phone looking for her. I don't say 2 words at that point, wake up, put all her shit in a bag and tell her to get lost, had the locks changed. No muss no fuss, no drama, GTFO. No awkwardness, no withholding of sex and stuff, no worrying about trying to find a place now, etc.
There is no scenerio ere it's okay for a guy not to have his own place until the day he is married. When you are married, okay obviously.
Do you think that craziness would have not happened had you never let her move into your house?