or Connect
Styleforum › Forums › General › General Chat › The parenting thread
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

The parenting thread - Page 6

post #76 of 158
Your son is going to be dropping acid with OKF in about 8 years. FYI. It will also probably be OKF's idea so that your kid can let his hair down when you aren't around.
post #77 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joffrey View Post

Your son is going to be dropping acid with OKF in about 8 years. FYI. It will also probably be OKF's idea so that your kid can let his hair down when you aren't around.

I will bury OKF alive in a gravel pit if that happens, but that is certainly my concern.

there are about a dozen parents of kids in my sons grade who use drugs regularly. honestly, I am sort of torn over whether it is better for my kids to learn about drugs from their kids, who might have access to pretty good quality drugs without having to go to the bad part of town and deal with drug dealers, or not. I wasn't a drug user in high school. so I am unclear about how these things work.
post #78 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by Geoffrey Firmin View Post

Anyone with teenage boys here? I have a 17 year old. Where do I begin?

I was there (a teenage boy) fairly recently- what's the problem? Sex, drugs, school, drinking, smoking, fighting, no respect, depression, lack of motivation, lack of direction, zero ambition, bright but not trying, trying but struggling, dating the wrong girl, has let himself go, won't get a job, doesn't want to leave the house, or other?
Quote:
Originally Posted by globetrotter View Post

yeah, we had him apologize, and then gave him a week without computer or electronic games, but allowing tv. I also had a talk with him about how some adults have more dignity than others, but he still needs to show them respect, and basically told him that I understood that it was difficult with the slippery slope of the OKF, but if he was going to hang out with him, he had to figure out the proper balance.

Have you let your son know your opinions on OKF prior to him calling him an ass? It seems like there would be some sort of outside influence on a comment like that at that age.
Quote:
I will bury OKF alive in a gravel pit if that happens, but that is certainly my concern.

there are about a dozen parents of kids in my sons grade who use drugs regularly. honestly, I am sort of torn over whether it is better for my kids to learn about drugs from their kids, who might have access to pretty good quality drugs without having to go to the bad part of town and deal with drug dealers, or not. I wasn't a drug user in high school. so I am unclear about how these things work.

Drugs is a roulette game. The best things I've seen and experienced to deal with it are a) making sure that your kid has the self respect and drive to avoid letting them become a problem if he does try b) making sure that he trusts you, your wife, or a family friend enough enough that if things do get out of control that he can talk to someone (this is a bit of a difficult one) and c) keeping vigilant enough that you can step in if option b doesn't pan out. Hair testing works too. It kept me from doing drugs during highschool for the most part.

I wouldn't worry too much about OKF. Your son is 9 and already thinks that he's a loser. He may smoke bud or trip a bit with OKF, but as long as you are someone that he looks up to and respects, or keep someone around who is an excellent role model that he respects, OKF will just be that loser who hooks him up with drugs or gives him a beer or talks about the glory days.
Quote:
there are about a dozen parents of kids in my sons grade who use drugs regularly. honestly, I am sort of torn over whether it is better for my kids to learn about drugs from their kids, who might have access to pretty good quality drugs without having to go to the bad part of town and deal with drug dealers, or not. I wasn't a drug user in high school. so I am unclear about how these things work.

He'll figure that out on his own. If he wants drugs, he'll find good enough excuses to hang out with people who can provide, so you don't need to worry about guiding him in the right direction. You'd have to ban sleep overs at other kids' houses, study sessions at other houses, and then have him monitored non stop at school.
Edited by HgaleK - 9/20/11 at 8:54am
post #79 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by globetrotter View Post

the other kid's father was pulling the two boys in a wagon, and I was pulling a wagon with the other kids and the apples. the OKF kept refering to himself as the boys' donkey, and my son said something like "I'd say more like our ass".


Dude, good on your son for having a quick wit, all propriety aside, that was well played.
post #80 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thomas View Post

Then I'd be sorely tempted to tell him how the cow eats the cabbage (our son is taught to respect his elders. period.)

So. . . how does the cow eat the cabbage?
post #81 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by HgaleK View Post




Have you let your son know your opinions on OKF prior to him calling him an ass? It seems like there would be some sort of outside influence on a comment like that at that age.

.

actually, not at all. this guy just is exceptionally immature, nice enough guy, just a real kid at heart
post #82 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by NorCal View Post


Dude, good on your son for having a quick wit, all propriety aside, that was well played.

yes, he is witty.
post #83 of 158
so had an intersting week.

my son goes to a very diverse school, one of the reasons we chose it. but that means that 40-50% of the kids get free lunch, and something like 25% live in million dollar houses. a large percentage have parents who are university profs.

anyway, every class has a couple of kids from broken up families that are problematic. and, unfortunatly, it's like that - there are almost no issues with the kids who have 2 parents with jobs and educations. the problems are all coming from the kids who have single parents who are really struggling on holding on to middle class.

anyway, the other day this kid grabs my sons neck, for no good reason (well, he objected to my son being on his team for a class game). left big red marks. freaked my kid out. actually freaked out a lot of the other kids in class, too.

we were torn over how to deal with it. my wife is president of the PTA, we didn't want to use prefernetial treatment, but we did want to make sure that the kid was punished well enough to make my son feel safer. the school has a zero tolerence policy, so if that is what they are teaching the kids, the kids need to be protected and feel safe.

anyway, worked out well, kid was suspended (I don't feel happy that the kid was suspended, but I do want him to understand that what he did wasn't acceptable.) my son seems happy and feels ok, no realy harm done.

never a dull moment
post #84 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by globetrotter View Post

so had an intersting week.
my son goes to a very diverse school, one of the reasons we chose it. but that means that 40-50% of the kids get free lunch, and something like 25% live in million dollar houses. a large percentage have parents who are university profs.
anyway, every class has a couple of kids from broken up families that are problematic. and, unfortunatly, it's like that - there are almost no issues with the kids who have 2 parents with jobs and educations. the problems are all coming from the kids who have single parents who are really struggling on holding on to middle class.
anyway, the other day this kid grabs my sons neck, for no good reason (well, he objected to my son being on his team for a class game). left big red marks. freaked my kid out. actually freaked out a lot of the other kids in class, too.
we were torn over how to deal with it. my wife is president of the PTA, we didn't want to use prefernetial treatment, but we did want to make sure that the kid was punished well enough to make my son feel safer. the school has a zero tolerence policy, so if that is what they are teaching the kids, the kids need to be protected and feel safe.
anyway, worked out well, kid was suspended (I don't feel happy that the kid was suspended, but I do want him to understand that what he did wasn't acceptable.) my son seems happy and feels ok, no realy harm done.
never a dull moment

Fair enough..

They acted on it...

Years ago , bullying was wildly accepted in UK schools and workplaces...

Things are changing slowly...

It was a culture shock when I first arrived to see people calling their colleagues and customers names to their faces ..
post #85 of 158
This thread makes me realize how easy raising my daughter has been so far. Everything else has been hard as can be, but she's stayed out of trouble, gotten good grades and developed a wonderful personality despite the fact that neither I nor her mother knew what we were doing.
post #86 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by munchausen View Post

This thread makes me realize how easy raising my daughter has been so far. Everything else has been hard as can be, but she's stayed out of trouble, gotten good grades and developed a wonderful personality despite the fact that neither I nor her mother knew what we were doing.

How old is she????

It is never too late to go off the rails.
post #87 of 158
she's 11, and yeah, I know I'm not out of the woods yet. In fact, I'm quite sure the part coming up is the hard part uhoh.gif
post #88 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by munchausen View Post

she's 11, and yeah, I know I'm not out of the woods yet. In fact, I'm quite sure the part coming up is the hard part uhoh.gif

Just wait 'til she hits the "I hate my fucking dad" stage.
It happened with all the RubeBabes™. They eventually grow out of it, but it surely sucks while it is in effect.
post #89 of 158
But I'm an awesome dad!!!!! cry.gif

Yeah I know. Not looking forward to it, as we are really close right now.
post #90 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dakota rube View Post

Just wait 'til she hits the "I hate my fucking dad" stage.
It happened with all the RubeBabes™. They eventually grow out of it, but it surely sucks while it is in effect.

The teen years....

Nobody is understanding me phase...

My parents are so annoying and embarassing..

I will have that in 10-12 years time..
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: General Chat
Styleforum › Forums › General › General Chat › The parenting thread