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Silently Judging Me - and my clothes! - Page 5

post #61 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by LARon
I agree with everything that's been said.

Most members of this forum are dedicated dressers who've perfected an individual style with which they're comfortable, and therefore have little concern about what others think, or feeling different from the crowd.

I've been "dressing" for 30 years and there've been many days -- even as far back as college, law school and the early days of my career -- when some have thought me overdressed, or were intimidated by my appearance (which is more often the case).

But on far more days, at least two or three a week, even now -- and often by total strangers or passersby -- I'm' complimented on how well put together I am, or how I inspire them, or put a smile on their face, or bring a touch of elegance to an otherwise "slouching toward Gomorra" kind of world. Yet, no matter the reaction, I've always dressed for me and have never changed my style; you shouldn't either.

To me, each day presents a new occasion to paint a canvas with the many colors and textures in my closet. I dress in the manner that suits me for the plannned activity of the day, be it business, law, upscale or downtown, knowing full well that others will take note of my appearance (it has always equaled my professional reputation -- a tremendous one-two punch I might add). While I don't prance and preen like some self-indugent peacock, I also try not to hold back on what I feel is the look I want to project, or the colors or fabrics I want to combine; and I find that people admire that, even if they themselves lack the courage or creativity to pull it off. (I learned long ago that it is easy to be ordinary, but it takes courage to succeed. I've committed both balls to the latter.)

Granted, I do have a "down" or weekend look, that includes shorts, jeans, cordurouys or khakis, and that reinforces my "regular guy-ness," and undermines any suggestion that I'm some stuck-up or aloof prig. By the same token, however, you'll never catch me in a t-shirt (at least not out in public). Even when I wear jeans, my shirts will have a collar. Its my belief that the widespread preference for jeans and t-shirts (not to mention sweats) are what has ruined our sartorial culture. It has made us lazy and stolen our creativity, to the point where nowadays we let designers dress us. Indeed, most people now consider themselves well dressed simply if they're wearing the designer du jure. Its just tragic.

Back on topic: don't change your style per se, but temper it to place and activity. Its one thing to be one step ahead of everyone else, and another to be two steps ahead. Nothing will bring out the long knives quicker than people believing you're getting too far ahead of them; it makes them look bad (like the kid who always set the grade curve above your reach).
Well said, Ron. But if you were going for a Yeats reference, I think it's "slouch[ing] toward Bethlehem", not Gomorra.
post #62 of 101
I have been saying for a couple of years that wearing a necktie draws nearly as much public scorn as wearing a Swatstika or the hood and robes of the KKK.
I always wear a tie to work and usually to dinner. I get some really nasty looks.
post #63 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by lawyerdad
Well said, Ron. But if you were going for a Yeats reference, I think it's "slouch[ing] toward Bethlehem", not Gomorra.

He may have been going for the Bork reference who was in turn going for the Yeats reference.
post #64 of 101
Do we have any biting tounge smilies??

K
post #65 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by redcaimen
He may have been going for the Bork reference who was in turn going for the Yeats reference.

Bingo.
post #66 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by kennethpollock
... draws nearly as much public scorn as wearing a Swatstika or the hood and robes of the KKK.

I didnt know you had summer homes in San Bernardino, CA and one off Beverly Blvd/La Brea in West Los Angeles.
post #67 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by kennethpollock
I have been saying for a couple of years that wearing a necktie draws nearly as much public scorn as wearing a Swatstika or the hood and robes of the KKK.
I always wear a tie to work and usually to dinner. I get some really nasty looks.
Maybe it's not the tie. Post pics.
post #68 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by Get Smart
I didnt know you had summer homes in San Bernardino, CA and one off Beverly Blvd/La Brea in West Los Angeles.

?

(what's this about? is it appropriate in a public forum about clothing to make reference to where someone lives?) besides, Beverly and La Brea isn't West LA
post #69 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by LARon
?

(what's this about? is it appropriate in a public forum about clothing to make reference to where someone lives?) besides, Beverly and La Brea isn't West LA

It was a joke about his tie=swastika=KKKrobe exaggeration. If you don't get it, being an LA resident, then I guess I'm the only one laughing and it really wasnt that funny.
post #70 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by LARon
?

(what's this about? is it appropriate in a public forum about clothing to make reference to where someone lives?) besides, Beverly and La Brea isn't West LA

kenpollack lives in Atlanta so far as I know.
post #71 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by kennethpollock
I have been saying for a couple of years that wearing a necktie draws nearly as much public scorn as wearing a Swatstika or the hood and robes of the KKK.
I always wear a tie to work and usually to dinner. I get some really nasty looks.


I wear a tie quite frequently. One might even say not infrequently. I have never gotten a nasty look. Ever. The worst is that I am considered 'unapproachable.'

This is not to say I have not received nasty looks. But never when I was wearing a tie. I think there may be other things at work, perhaps a somber and critical mein?

Regards,
Huntsman
post #72 of 101
Apologies; my bad for jumping the gun -- I should've gotten the Beverly/La Brea reference. (Still puzzled by San Bernardino though, unless East LA would've fit the same bill.) Nevertheless, it doesn't matter.
post #73 of 101
Quote:
Originally Posted by Huntsman
I wear a tie quite frequently. One might even say not infrequently. I have never gotten a nasty look. Ever. The worst is that I am considered 'unapproachable.'

This is not to say I have not received nasty looks. But never when I was wearing a tie. I think there may be other things at work, perhaps a somber and critical mein?

Regards,
Huntsman

I've had the same experience. Actually, when I wear a tie people tend to open doors for me, smile at me, speak kindly to me, set next to me on the bus, etc. In fact, I think I look more approachable in a suit and tie than in street clothes - street clothes make me look more intimidating than a suit.

Compare:
post #74 of 101
I say that if you are perceiving such animosity when wearing a tie in the majority of social settings then;

a. There is something more than just the tie at work there
b. You are thinking way too much about what other people think about you

Shape up your other crap, and then get over it

K
post #75 of 101
The tie-wearing, basket carrying folks of the world would be shocked to know the ability of the poor and simple to read clearly the contempt writ large across the face of said tie wearers.
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