Keeping old etiquette rules alive - Page 7

Anyone else get the inner voice "this chick must dig me" signal when a woman holds a door open for you?

So you admit that you're doing it for yourself then?

I used to.
Now I realize she's only doing it because I am an old fucker.

while in France a few years ago, I mistakenly called a 20something year old waitress "Madame" instead of "mademoiselle". She was visibly upset with me.

^^^ Really? It's actually proper in most places where they speak French (i.e., France, Quebec, etc.) to refer to men (including waiters) as Monsieur (Mister) and women as Madame (Madam). In days past, Mademoiselle (miss) was used to refer to young women (i.e., under 30) and only then if unmarried, but not in Quebec where--since its founding--everybody's a "Monsieur" or "Madame." [Note: these terms were actually titles reserved for those without any actual title (i.e. below the aristocracy whom alone would be referred to as "m’lord", "m’lady", which are formalities still used when addressing i.e. the High Court, for e.g.).] Despite this, people in the service industry---such as a waiter/waitress, etc.---would in all French places be referred to as 'mademoiselle' (miss) if female regardless of age or marital status. (Male waiters were called "garcon" (boy), but today are referred to as "monsieur" since calling a grown man a boy isn't proper by today's standards). 'Mademoiselle' is still acceptable when referring to a female server (so far as it's generic), but in no way makes it wrong to refer to her as Madame either: in other words, the only mistake was on her part and not yours, Jodum. I certainly hope that you did not leave her a tip! Could be the woman serving you, Jodum, is a stickler for the old rules and formalities (I still hope you did not leave her a tip), though most French women (as in, women not teenagers/girls) do not like to be called 'mademoiselle' today regardless of their age or marital status (i.e., draws undue attention to same), and especially not a professional woman in any case.

Well, if after calling her *that* she holds a door open for you, I can see where you'd get that vibe, alright ... but be careful, though. She may just be opening it so that you enter, only to let it suddenly close EDIT: Ah, but your point re: referring to a woman as "ma'am" is a good one. Apart from those in law enforcement and the military (where the ranking system requires the use of "Ma'am" and "Sir"), I agree with you that it's safe to use "Madam" (except maybe not in a certain resto in France, ... ). But Ma'am is still considered proper in the Southern USA, no?

Though I still remember it clearly because my friends laughed at me for the mistake, it's quite likely she was just a biatch. Don't really care though.

Yes, I understand completely and agree. I truly hope that you did not leave her a tip (again, you did nothing wrong; also, it's not like you called her "Garcon" (boy), right?). Your observation is bang-on and correct, and I doubt she's still employed in the service industry with an attitude like that, I mean. Glad to hear your friends had a good time of it at least ... er ... *Sigh* And French service is supposed to be the epitome of refinement. (There are actually schools in France that teach the French service; she must have missed that part

So, on the train today heading to work. Most of the seats are taken so I sit in the section were handicapped or elderly people get priority (but it's not reserved for them). Haggard looking lady with a carriage and two little ones comes in. I of course feel awkward hogging the seat when the tired mom stands there, so I get up and stand in the middle of the train (didn't offer it to her but she was free to take it of course as she was right infront of it). Fucking bitch places her carriage next to the three seats (two for handicapped/elderly people and a normal one therefore blocking access for other people) and one little kid lays down on them so he can dick around. Meanwhile she just stands there without a care in the world. People keep coming in and I know they want one or two of those seats. Anyway I keep flipping my gre flashcards. Finally after about 10 minutes she sits down one of the seats with the kid, while her carriage blocks the last free seat.

I get out of the train and head to my building. As I'm heading to the door, this cute blonde is rushing out. There are two of us outside about to come in and she storms out and let's the door slam shut in our faces. Where the hell is she from, where you don't hold the door open a bit (just to delay the slammed-door-in-face problem for others)???

I don't understand the question.

I am opening the door for myself but am holding it open for and allowing the lady to pass through first. Not because I think she is incapable of opening the door herself, but as a sign of respect.

to whom exactly are you being rude if you stare at your penis instead of the wall?

i wasn't serious about being offended by it, although it does gross me out a little. and before you ask, i also don't often challenge people to duels or consider wet kisses a matter of etiquette.

You mean courtesy right? right?