Always fun to introduce new ideas to the Style forum for praise & ridicule. This is the 3rd in our seven-part tribute to the deadly sins. First was Gluttony. Second was Envy. Today, I proudly present WRATH. You can find 'em all on Betabrand.com. Now, on to the story: 
Following the decadent success of our Gluttony and Envy pants, we're pleased as punch to release the 3rd edition of our seven-trouser tribute to the Deadly Sins. Introducing Wrath pants, the newest, blackest members of the Betabrand family! 
They’re blacker than a coal-miner's armpits on a moonless midnight. Blacker than a dark-matter milkshake. Blacker than Finnish death metal. Good Lord, they're black! Speaking of which, we've lined these black-hearted beauties with a veritable A-team of wrathful deities. Yes, that's furious Jesus firing a M60 from one pocket, and Buddha blasting a flamethrower from the other. They're joined by the irate trio of Thor, Ganesh, and Anubis – armed, respectively, with a rocket launcher, Uzis, and a chainsaw.* 
In addition to the performance features listed below, we're proud to announce that each pair of Wrath pants comes with a t-shirt that borrows from the finest traditions of heavy-metal merchandising. And that's not all: Wrath pants have their own screaming-guitar theme song to fill your veins with scalding venom every time you put them on! 
Wrath pants performance features: · Awarded platinum rating from Steven Segal Institute of Advanced Vengeance Studies. · Clap of thunder issues forth when unzipping fly. 
· Cause sinister black gloves to materialize on hands. · Give legs irresistible urge to kick ass. · Translate as “you are doomed” when used in nautical semaphore. · Will spontaneously combust little fluffy dogs on contact. · If worn while walking through hell, demons will avoid direct eye contact. · Best washed in hot blood of vanquished foes, and tumble-dried on low. *Production costs prevent us from including all deities and holy figures. However, if you’d be interested in a coffee mug depicting, for instance, a burning bush brandishing Molotov cocktails, please let us know. See 'em for yourself at www.betabrand.com
Following the decadent success of our Gluttony and Envy pants, we're pleased as punch to release the 3rd edition of our seven-trouser tribute to the Deadly Sins. Introducing Wrath pants, the newest, blackest members of the Betabrand family! They’re blacker than a coal-miner's armpits on a moonless midnight. Blacker than a dark-matter milkshake. Blacker than Finnish death metal. Good Lord, they're black! Speaking of which, we've lined these black-hearted beauties with a veritable A-team of wrathful deities. Yes, that's furious Jesus firing a M60 from one pocket, and Buddha blasting a flamethrower from the other. They're joined by the irate trio of Thor, Ganesh, and Anubis – armed, respectively, with a rocket launcher, Uzis, and a chainsaw.* In addition to the performance features listed below, we're proud to announce that each pair of Wrath pants comes with a t-shirt that borrows from the finest traditions of heavy-metal merchandising. And that's not all: Wrath pants have their own screaming-guitar theme song to fill your veins with scalding venom every time you put them on! Wrath pants performance features: · Awarded platinum rating from Steven Segal Institute of Advanced Vengeance Studies. · Clap of thunder issues forth when unzipping fly. · Cause sinister black gloves to materialize on hands. · Give legs irresistible urge to kick ass. · Translate as “you are doomed” when used in nautical semaphore. · Will spontaneously combust little fluffy dogs on contact. · If worn while walking through hell, demons will avoid direct eye contact. · Best washed in hot blood of vanquished foes, and tumble-dried on low. *Production costs prevent us from including all deities and holy figures. However, if you’d be interested in a coffee mug depicting, for instance, a burning bush brandishing Molotov cocktails, please let us know. See 'em for yourself at www.betabrand.com
