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SF Official Relationship Thread

post #1 of 46
7/26/10 at 12:18pm
Thread Starter 
Partly so I don't keep clogging up the Pissing you Off Thread and partly because people have floated the idea of a relationship sub-forum I figured why not at least have a thread.

If you've read, it hasn't been good for me the past week. I'll talk to her sometime soon and just tell her what's up. Figured something like this "look, you know I have feelings for you. I know you don't but I just want you to know that. And if you don't want to be with me, we at least can be friends. We have too much in common and too much fun together to not be friends. But I don't want to be on the outside with you. I want you in my life and I want to be in yours."

I know neither of us wants to not be friends at least and I'm friends with all my exes except a "GF" I had when I was 13 so it isn't that it can't be done.

Of course I'm not going to talk to her until she does. I know from past experiences she fucking hates not hearing from me so whatever.

FUCK i really don't know what to do. I hate conflict, I hate people leaving my life for any reason and I am patient to the point where submissiveness begins sometimes. And when I mean I hate those things, I mean I purposely structure my life to avoid any of them, so it isn't just a strong dislike for them.

Whatever, I'm a bitch, I know this and I guess I just don't do romantic relationships well. My love life is a giant fucking
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post #2 of 46
7/26/10 at 12:24pm
yeah you're becoming her bitch, Ed... snap out of it.
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post #3 of 46
7/26/10 at 12:30pm
There's really nothing that can be done for you. You were just born an emotional creature. You'll have higher highs and lower lows.

Some guys are just inherently emotional relationship guys.

Some guys are just "I want to get my dick wet" guys. They don't get hung up, but then again, it's not exactly a fulfilling lifestyle.

You can't change the hand you've been dealt when it comes to brain chemistry and hangups...well you can but it takes a lot of time and effort.
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post #4 of 46
7/26/10 at 12:34pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by acidboy View Post
yeah you're becoming her bitch, Ed... snap out of it.

why does this ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPEN TO ME. It's been the hardest with her though that I've fallen or whatever.
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post #5 of 46
7/26/10 at 12:52pm
Ed, I don't want to get all faggy on you, especially since I think you are the definition of FAIL. That said, I think you should really just move on. You deserve to be with someone who thinks that you are the best thing since sliced bread. I mean, seriously. The way she treated you on that trip was not just typical pissy mood type stuff. She was just rude and inconsiderate the entire time. I don't see why you want to be with a woman like that. Granted, I understand you have feelings for her, but you need to look at the bigger picture. You were absolutely miserable that whole time. You just need to find someone that actually appreciates you for who you are, and enjoy the search while it lasts.

cockfag.
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post #6 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:02pm
Edina,

I am a man who lives by reason, logic, and cost-benefit. It's sometimes a little cold, but it works. Nearly every decision in life can be made through a consideration of which choice provides the greatest net benefit. As I've read the stories about what you've been through with this chick, my thoughts have been "why does he love her?" and "what is the benefit for him?"

Now I know that not every relationship provides a net benefit at every moment - sometimes you're going to give more than you receive - but I don't see where this chick has provided you with any benefit. She makes you miserable, and she seems to be taking advantage of you.

Your brother in Georgia-dom,
MrG

PS Stop being such a puss, pussy.
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post #7 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:03pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by edinatlanta View Post
why does this ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPEN TO ME. It's been the hardest with her though that I've fallen or whatever.

i was shitty in the other threak in an effort to get you to snap out of it, but clearly i was not successful.

the fact that this seems to happen to you repeatedly is not bad luck, it is not coincidence, it is something in your character. you ought to examine that, get to the bottom of it, and then move on with healthier relationships. relationship patterns do not develop by accident.

seriously, this girl is a fucking bitch, and you need to

a) dump her completely. this friend thing is a gay-ass rationalization. someone who treats you as she treated you is not a friend. having things in common does not make you someone's friend. and carrying a torch for her does not make you a good candidate to be her friend.

b) do some introspective thinking, get a therapist, whatever. this relationship was dysfunctional and unhealthy and the fact that you don't get that means you're doomed to keep on repeating the same playbook.

sorry to be harsh.
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post #8 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by kwilkinson View Post
Ed, I don't want to get all faggy on you, especially since I think you are the definition of FAIL. That said, I think you should really just move on. You deserve to be with someone who thinks that you are the best thing since sliced bread. I mean, seriously. The way she treated you on that trip was not just typical pissy mood type stuff. She was just rude and inconsiderate the entire time. I don't see why you want to be with a woman like that. Granted, I understand you have feelings for her, but you need to look at the bigger picture. You were absolutely miserable that whole time. You just need to find someone that actually appreciates you for who you are, and enjoy the search while it lasts.

cockfag.

I don't know OP or the situation, but this definitely sounds like sound advice. Trust his opinion as an unbiased third perspective, it doesn't seem like you were very happy. Don't get oneitis, there's plenty of women out there, you won't regret moving on when you find one that treats you well. Love will come easy when it's right, you shouldn't have to work so hard at it. Keep looking.
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post #9 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:06pm
You should watch Swingers. Gave me some better perspective when my last gf and I broke up
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post #10 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:15pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by kwilkinson View Post
Ed, I don't want to get all faggy on you, especially since I think you are the definition of FAIL. That said, I think you should really just move on. You deserve to be with someone who thinks that you are the best thing since sliced bread. I mean, seriously. The way she treated you on that trip was not just typical pissy mood type stuff. She was just rude and inconsiderate the entire time. I don't see why you want to be with a woman like that. Granted, I understand you have feelings for her, but you need to look at the bigger picture. You were absolutely miserable that whole time. You just need to find someone that actually appreciates you for who you are, and enjoy the search while it lasts.

cockfag.

+1
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post #11 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:17pm
Some things are best kept off the internet.
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post #12 of 46
7/26/10 at 1:19pm
Don't think twice, its alright.
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post #13 of 46
7/26/10 at 5:50pm
I'm dating an awesome Dutch woman. Somehow, I just don't have the time to post WAYWTs these days...
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post #14 of 46
7/26/10 at 5:55pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by holymadness View Post
Some things are best kept off the internet.

I'd rather whine on the internet than let my friends know what a big bitch I am.
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post #15 of 46
7/26/10 at 6:02pm
And I thought this was going to be about Matt and spb_lady.
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