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[Need Advice!] girl problems....

post #1 of 53
Thread Starter 
Well lets see here.. theres this one girl whos very good looking (in fact is a cheerleader) that I have been quite attracted to.. i talk to her now and then but never really got to know her.... I bumped into her one day and we decided to go eat lunch.. I found out that she knew more about me than I thought and found out that she visits my internet blog quite often (i dont write on it much though) and remembers a lot about me.. i was quite surprised

Anyways, few weeks later, i decided to ask her out to a dinner/movie.. and she was very eager to go skipping out clubbin that night... we hit it off quite well at dinner and at the movies... after the movie, she didnt want the night to end and wanted to watch another movie. It was already to late so instead we went to a bar and had some fun. afterwards she wanted to do something so we decided to go back to my place. We chilled in the living room talkin/watchin tv until we finally went to my room to sleep. I kinda liked this girl so we didnt end up having sex, but just a lot of making out/cuddling/foreplay...

I decided to invite her to go to a fair two days later.. she was thrilled and wanted to go... but in the morning at the last minute, she told me some important family thing came up and she couldnt go and was very sorry... I told her it was ok... she later messaged me a few more times tellin me how much she wanted to go and was sorry. I believed that she didnt really stand me up and that she really had something important so It didnt bother me much.

The next few days were kinda weird.. we still talked normally but she seemed very depressed and very sleep-deprived. I asked her to go eat lunch/get some coffee but she couldn't since she had to study for an exam.. so again i still didnt really care much.

Few days later, I was going to go to a bar, and she told me she was gonna go to the same bar with some friends and wanted to see me there. So I went, but when I got there, i see her with a group of guys flirting her ass off and drinking every shot that the guys offered her. We did talk, but she was throughly drunk.. not very fun.

I asked her out on friday, but she turned me down cause she wanted to go to a party with some friends. She got trashed that night. So trashed she didnt go clubbin with me and some friends the next day.

It was starting to bother me but I shrugged it off and asked her to go out on the sunday. I got no response whatsoever... however, the next morning, she calls me and tells me that her phone was cut off cause of not payin the bills and apologized like crazy.

And later that week, turns down goin out for coffee to hang out with some friends and turns down lunch for a "job interview"......

I am frustrated now. Is this girl a psycho and should i just ditch her and leave? or should i continue and im just at the wrong place at the wrong time?

P.S. past history of her includes her boyfriend cheating on her

- Mark
post #2 of 53
If you ditch her and leave, she might wise up.

She sounds out of control. I personally couldn't be attracted to a girl who's habitually trashed.
post #3 of 53
Try to say that you wants to leave her if she don't try to be with you and stuffs like that, and if she don't say that she likes you are what so ever, than you should see the fact that she's a hmm
post #4 of 53
post #5 of 53
I would make plans with her and then cancel about an hour before. I have done this before and it drives lots of women crazy. They show more interest after you do something like that. Try it and let me know how it works.
post #6 of 53
give me her number, i'll try to talk some sense into her.
post #7 of 53
Just stop calling her or whatever, and two weeks later, just run into her again. She seems like the type to enjoy that sort of roundabout dance.
post #8 of 53
Ya, I agree with earthmover. It seems like you're trying too hard to make it happen at this point. Don't even call her for a while and just run in to her again. Do something spur of the moment. This chick obviously isn't a planner.

Plus, the behavior you're seeing might be due to a recent break-up. Girls act stupid after long-term relationships come to an end. She might just be confused. Either way, you shouldn't get too attached to her.
post #9 of 53
Use a hammer

or

Start picking up other girls right away and tell her you have another date, and say "It doesn't get better than me, you'll be sorry and be back and I'll be gone"
Actually the second line sounds cocky, but it works - true true. Confidence in one's own market value with women is great. Women want to compete, especially the hot girls.
post #10 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by GQgeek
Ya, I agree with earthmover. It seems like you're trying too hard to make it happen at this point. Don't even call her for a while and just run in to her again. Do something spur of the moment. This chick obviously isn't a planner.

Plus, the behavior you're seeing might be due to a recent break-up. Girls act stupid after long-term relationships come to an end. She might just be confused. Either way, you shouldn't get too attached to her.
Or she could just be stupid, period. +1 on everyone else's advice. Devote your time and energy elsewhere. If she decides she misses your attention and wants to get it back, you can decide then whether it's worthwhile.
post #11 of 53
stop calling her. Next time she says she wants to go out be non-commital and dont go. Play it like that a few times, then meet up with her (no dates, just at some bar or party or whatever) and be aloof and make her pursue you. Now if she's truly interested she'll keep trying, if she's just looking for some fun then she'll try until you two sleep together (afterwards continue to be distant) or she'll lose interest and go after the next guy.

That's how honeys our age like to play it
post #12 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jodum5
stop calling her. Next time she says she wants to go out be non-commital and dont go. Play it like that a few times, then meet up with her (no dates, just at some bar or party or whatever) and be aloof and make her pursue you. Now if she's truly interested she'll keep trying, if she's just looking for some fun then she'll try until you two sleep together (afterwards continue to be distant) or she'll lose interest and go after the next guy.

That's how honeys our age like to play it

Yeah...and they are fucking retards. Sorry if this offends anyone, but chicks our age (I'm 23, you guys are a bit younger...but not by much) are morons. I don't mean in an intellectually sort of way, I mean when it comes to relationships. They just can't seem to hold one together, it's all a game of smoke and mirrors. If they like a person, they should go out with them, if not they end up losing them; seriously, their attitude is insanely masochistic.

Sorry, rant over.

Jon.
post #13 of 53
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the helpful replies.

She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on my because its been a hectic week for her and she invited me to go out and eat lunch with her sometime next week.

I just told her that shes always too busy and if she really would do what she says, so I will just think about it and get back to her later.

that should be ok right?
post #14 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by dontbam
Thanks for the helpful replies.

She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on my because its been a hectic week for her and she invited me to go out and eat lunch with her sometime next week.

I just told her that shes always too busy and if she really would do what she says, so I will just think about it and get back to her later.

that should be ok right?

Probably not. Even though it was the truth, it was too direct, IMHO. You should have played it cool like you were so busy that you didn't notice she blew you off.

Jon.
post #15 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by dontbam
Thanks for the helpful replies.

She called me last night and told me that she was sorry for bailin out on me...

Get used to hearing that. I tried to date a woman like this too and it was utter frustration the entire time. I finally got so mad at her I told her that she was quite possibly the rudest person I had ever met and that she could go to hell. I didn't need to get laid that badly. Hell, I didn't need a date that badly.

In the end I lost a really hard to find import CD that I had lent to her. It was worth the cost to get away from her.

Do not call her. Stop pursuing her. You've committed yourself too much as it is--she knows if she calls you will respond. You're the dog, she's Pavlov. Move on to someone new.


b
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