Originally Posted by Vinnie Vegas
I'm quick witted and on-point with my comebacks, so if anyone has anything negative to say about me (included my clothes), I tend to reduce their social standing to those within earshot quite significantly, and they tend not to
I'll reply with something like "Oh, so I suppose I should dress like the mannequin from *insert whatever store they look like they shop at* instead?" or "Heaven forbid somebody should have class... Maybe I should trade my clothes with a hobo like you did."
Severity of insult depends on the severity of the criticism, and whether it's intended to insult or is just observational.
But yeah, humour/confidence/wit tends to protect pretty comfortably against insults, but realistically, if you're confident enough in the way you carry yourself, you should normally get more compliments than criticism.
You sound like one of those guys who gets paid to write for a niche interest blog/magazine/whatever, so you never had to develop beyond your comfortable self image (and writing style). Honestly, "fuck you" is a better comeback than 90% of everything, especially when you're saying it to someone you don't know. It shows that you disrespect them, but also that you don't care too much about them.
Then again, Jet sounds like a Barney's showroom salesperson with Tourette's and Wernicke's Aphasia, so I mean whatever.