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Urgent help needed for birthday

post #1 of 13
5/22/10 at 1:48am
Thread Starter 
Ok, situation is I contacted a person I used to know but was never very close with her. Anyway, she has turned 18 and she is holding her bday party this evening and as I managed to be around in the same city I will be there conveniently for the weekend.

I told her I would love to come to her bday so I am going, but the problem now is should I bring a present of somesort or not? According to her its a small thing, 20 people at her family friends' house, so I have no idea on who the people are, should I bring a present or how to dress.

I dont want to be a jerk and find out that I would be the only one without a present, but I dont know if the other people are bringing presents either. Second, I would have no idea what to bring; perhaps a bottle of wine but I'm afraid if this might be too flashy or something.

I basically urged myself to go to her party and I've always had a small thing for her, so now I hope I dont screw thngs over and I could possibly improve my relationship with her. Ideas?
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post #2 of 13
5/22/10 at 2:05am
Don't get a gift. Why would you get a gift? No. Don't get a gift.
If not getting her a gift hurts your relationship with her, is that really the type of person you want a relationship with in the first place?
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post #3 of 13
5/22/10 at 2:27am
Thread Starter 
Tbh I doubt I will ever be in a relationship with her, but what I really want is to become good friends with her..
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post #4 of 13
5/22/10 at 2:30am
just bring a gift why ask us? we dont know you or her or the situation better than you, she's not going to kill you for bringing a gift.
at least out of context of anything else, if you dont bring a gift to someone's b day party that you were invited to you will look like the small timer who didnt bring a gift.
why is this even a question? bring a dam gift.
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post #5 of 13
5/22/10 at 2:34am
be classy and bring something . . . a card . . . flowers . . . doesn't matter. don't be a schmuck.
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post #6 of 13
5/22/10 at 7:35am
small present would do, the ones that girls goes awweee so cute, but cost me literally 50 cents in Asia..., I mean you don't really know her, it's just courtesy gesture, if you are going to bring flower, you got to present it correctly, otherwise you will look awkward, nothing too out there (100 roses would be too out there for example) is the general key.
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post #7 of 13
5/22/10 at 9:07am
Bring a gift DB..especially if it is at a family friend's house. Flowers are cool. And a bottle of wine for the host family!
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post #8 of 13
5/22/10 at 10:45am
take a bottle of something decent, doesn't really matter what, it's a token/offering, and hell, you can always just sit there and get hammered on it yourself.
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post #9 of 13
5/22/10 at 10:51am
A bottle of wine for an 18yr old?
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post #10 of 13
5/22/10 at 11:04am
I was thinking more vodka or whisky, but ya. EDIT - oh, sorry, forgot in the US the drinking age is 21. In which case my response is:
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post #11 of 13
5/22/10 at 5:29pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Matt View Post
I was thinking more vodka or whisky, but ya.

EDIT - oh, sorry, forgot in the US the drinking age is 21. In which case my response is:

Haha.

I'd say skip the gift. I think it would be a bit much if you don't know her well. It's just asking for an awkward situation.

The exception was the bottle of wine/whiskey/vodka, but I don't really see that happening.
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post #12 of 13
5/22/10 at 7:22pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by makker View Post
Ok, situation is I contacted a person I used to know but was never very close with her. Anyway, she has turned 18 and she is holding her bday party this evening and as I managed to be around in the same city I will be there conveniently for the weekend.

I told her I would love to come to her bday so I am going, but the problem now is should I bring a present of somesort or not? According to her its a small thing, 20 people at her family friends' house, so I have no idea on who the people are, should I bring a present or how to dress.

I dont want to be a jerk and find out that I would be the only one without a present, but I dont know if the other people are bringing presents either. Second, I would have no idea what to bring; perhaps a bottle of wine but I'm afraid if this might be too flashy or something.

I basically urged myself to go to her party and I've always had a small thing for her, so now I hope I dont screw thngs over and I could possibly improve my relationship with her. Ideas?

BUy her booze. Put it in a gift bag all covered up in paper. If her parents are there she will hide it, if not she will open it. Dress well but not conservatively.
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post #13 of 13
5/22/10 at 7:50pm
You can also order the comprehensive "Attending A (barely) Of-Age Girl's Party Guide Package" from Jodum5

Includes:

-Handling Parents and Older siblings you may be older than
-Walking the 21/Not 21 Tightrope (aka Restaurants with Bars)
-Dealing With the High School Boyfriend
-How to Properly Leverage your own Car/Apartment
-Properly Contextualizing (aka lying) about Your Own Age
-A copy of "An Education" on DVD

PM for details
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