Originally Posted by MetroStyles
Here's the point guys:
a) If you were 100% secure, you would have no need to ask.
b) You want to know because you are insecure. Nothing wrong with that. Most of us are to some extent.
c) Getting an unexpected answer from her can only hurt the relationship if you are insecure, and fro (a) and (b) we have deduced you must be.
So don't do it. I used to do it in HS and college but the numbers were smaller then. Now I don't bother. I don't want to know if she slept with 30 guys.
This is exactly the point! Youve learned, that to know in the past has hurt you, or affected the relationship.
Now that you are older and wiser you would NOT know, yet if you were to find out "I dont want to know if she slept with 30 guys" it would hurt you.
Its avoidance. You think things are different because the same shit happened, just you dont know? The main reason id like to know, is that it shows a womans character, how many men she has been with, and avoiding the subject is only bad for you. There just has to be a tactful way to find out.
Its unfortunate, but I think,even if I found the perfect girl, but there were to many guys before me, I would leave.
I wish it wasnt like that, but thats me.