Things that are pissing you off- Food & Drink Edition

I've tried ribs in restaurants that have no fond on them, no smoke, and obviously were just boiled until tender and slathered with sauce. So wrong.

Originally Posted by iammatt

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My mother used to serve them boiled, then slathered in dijon mustard, topped with breadcrumbs and broiled. I don't know if I would like them now if I hadn't eaten them then, but the mustard cuts the fat really well, and the whole thing is very comforting.
i was speaking strictly of bbq. this is one of my favorite dishes. the only twist, i use the bones from a standing rib roast. quite possibly the world's single greatest leftover.

Originally Posted by Thomas

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...actually, I know a guy who par-boils them and then broils them, but he's an impatient bastard.
this is kind of standard restaurant practice ... like par-cooking risotto. but you can easily tell ... there's no "snap" to the meat.

Originally Posted by foodguy

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this is kind of standard restaurant practice ... like par-cooking risotto. but you can easily tell ... there's no "snap" to the meat.

Bingo. It's limp and the bones taste, well...boiled.

Cheese on seafood pastas.

Shortribs with a mustard-based sauce.

Beef ribs from Dreamland in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. All haters eat those then talk ****.

I have been asked three times since being in NOLA if I want my dry, stirred sapphire martini "on the rocks." It's all I can do not to reach over the bar and ***** slap these shitheads....sorry, got carried away.

This doesn't really belong in this thread, but it involves food and is very weird, so here we go.

Last night I had a dream where I was on Top Chef. I had won the season already, but there was time for one more episode. So they had me cook an 8 course meal.
The strangest part is that the kitchen I was cooking in was a certain StyleForum member's kitchen. But on the other side of his kitchen, was my parents dining room. So I cooked in his kitchen, then plated in my parent's dining room, then sent the food out to the guests.
It was going great, the amuse and first 5 courses were incredible. Then we got to the very final savory course, which was a lamb dish. **** just started TANKING. I mean, deeper in the ***** than I can even imagine. All of a sudden, the little cutie from the Next FoodNetwork Star, Kelsey Nixon, shows up. She convinces me that my lamb dish is a bad idea, and that my final savory course should be loin of rabbit. So somehow we magically make a rabbit dish in the 15 minutes between courses. The judges hated my rabbit dish, those ungrateful F***ers. Tom Colicchio said it was one of the worst courses on any season of Top Chef ever.
Then we send out the two desserts and they are going okay.
After dinner, I had planned to send out little chocolates that I had made. They tasted great. Then, Kelsey walks up to me and says "Let's give them this keffir lime instead!" and shoves a keffir lime in my face. It doesn't look like a keffir lime. I taste it. It has the pit of a cherry, the crunch/texture of a radish, and tastes exactly like a keffir lime.
So I agree to serve the keffir lime.
What do I do with it? I decide to pickle it.
Yes. The very last taste I gave the judges was a pickled ******* radish/cherry/keffir lime.

Tom walked back in the kitchen and said "that was so terrible, we've decided to not have a winner of Top Chef this season."
As soon as he said that, I woke up.
It was ******* weird

You should have gone to the whorehouse

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

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This doesn't really belong in this thread, but it involves food and is very weird, so here we go.

Last night I had a dream where I was on Top Chef. I had won the season already, but there was time for one more episode. So they had me cook an 8 course meal.
The strangest part is that the kitchen I was cooking in was a certain StyleForum member's kitchen. But on the other side of his kitchen, was my parents dining room. So I cooked in his kitchen, then plated in my parent's dining room, then sent the food out to the guests.
It was going great, the amuse and first 5 courses were incredible. Then we got to the very final savory course, which was a lamb dish. **** just started TANKING. I mean, deeper in the ***** than I can even imagine. All of a sudden, the little cutie from the Next FoodNetwork Star, Kelsey Nixon, shows up. She convinces me that my lamb dish is a bad idea, and that my final savory course should be loin of rabbit. So somehow we magically make a rabbit dish in the 15 minutes between courses. The judges hated my rabbit dish, those ungrateful F***ers. Tom Colicchio said it was one of the worst courses on any season of Top Chef ever.
Then we send out the two desserts and they are going okay.
After dinner, I had planned to send out little chocolates that I had made. They tasted great. Then, Kelsey walks up to me and says "Let's give them this keffir lime instead!" and shoves a keffir lime in my face. It doesn't look like a keffir lime. I taste it. It has the pit of a cherry, the crunch/texture of a radish, and tastes exactly like a keffir lime.
So I agree to serve the keffir lime.
What do I do with it? I decide to pickle it.
Yes. The very last taste I gave the judges was a pickled ******* radish/cherry/keffir lime.

Tom walked back in the kitchen and said "that was so terrible, we've decided to not have a winner of Top Chef this season."
As soon as he said that, I woke up.
It was ******* weird

I was kinda hoping ******* Padma on the kitchen counter while she's wearing an apron and nothing else would be part of the dream.

Actually, if Gail Simmons had been at the whorehouse, now THAT would be a dream.

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

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Actually, if Gail Simmons had been at the whorehouse, now THAT would be a dream.

Are you turning into a chubby chaser?

Originally Posted by ChicagoRon

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Are you turning into a chubby chaser?
I like em thick w/ some bewbies. Nothin better than that.

Kyle, seriously. Dood. It's like Padma and Gail are not even in the same species of hawt.

Originally Posted by Piobaire

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Kyle, seriously. Dood. It's like Padma and Gail are not even in the same species of hawt.

I know. Gail is way hotter.

Originally Posted by kwilkinson

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I know. Gail is way hotter.