Experience being a bridesmen? - Page 4

I'm generally pretty conservative, but I just don't see the big deal. Having only women on one side and men on the other is sort of a holdover from a different time when men and women had little casual contact with each other. I think people have been moving this way for a while; some fifteen years ago I was an "usher" or groomsman at my aunt's wedding. I stood with the guys, even though I didn't know the groom really at all. I've often seen the brother of the bride in the groom's party, and vice versa. Just changing the standing arrangements doesn't seem to be a big deal to me. I do think some people will chuckle or find it weird, but it's not particularly "progressive." It's not progressive anymore that men and women can be very close friends in 2010. And to the chucklers: fuck'em. You're doing this for your friend, it's an honor, who gives a shit what ppl in a virtual locker room have to say about it. Just have fun, treat is just as you would if you were the best man for a male friend; have a tasteful toast prepared, make sure everyone is where they need to be, offer any clerical or menial help to the bride in the 24 hours preceding (you're basically her bitch. she wants tequila, you bring back herradurra, limes, and salt. she wants pizza, you're on it. she needs someone to babysit aunt francine, you do it), and have a great time. And if you can't parlay this into a night between the sheets with a bridesmaid, either you look like Nick Nolte after a bender or your heart's just not in it.

Yes, I did. She was delighted to be chosen.

As stated above, I had two female groom's people - one of whom was my best woman. Aside from that, it was a very traditional and formal high church Anglo-Catholic service. No big deal.

+ 1 to Douglas, above ^

For ME, I think this would be the answer if it just makes no sense to stand on the other side. All times I have seen the Bride's brother, etc... stand with the groom they at least have some relationship. The other option is to MC the reception (not Men's Clothing, emcee).

There is no right or wrong answer, I do not think. No, of course it does not mean you are gay nor should that matter. But, some people do value tradition in some parts of our lives. I am one of those. But that does not mean I would care to prevent people that do not value it the same as me to do what they like.

Wow I'm surprised that some people are even making this an issue.

To the OP, just be there for your friend however she needs you to be. If it's standing on one side of an aisle or another it really shouldn't matter... it's standing in a goddamn line, it's not going to destroy any traditional values of marriage.

The type of people who are going to care in the slightest about that are the type of people who use any deviations to be judgmental and petty.

To be clear, I was not referencing any traditional values about marriage. I could care less about t
hat. I am talking about tradition of a wedding. I suppose aesthetics. Same reason some people do not wear brown shoes at night.

This is why I say there is no right answer to whether it is right or wrong. It is the OP's friends wedding and if that is the way she and those involved want it, then it is right. The problem is the people, maybe like me (maybe not for the same simple, small, non-judgmental reason) think that because it is not right for them, it is wrong for people more than capable of planning their own wedding.