A few years ago, my dear friend Doug Meis and two of his friends, Michael Dahlquist and John Glick, were killed in a car crash. It wasn't an accident- the driver was trying to end her own life, and intentionally crashed her car at 90 mph into a car full of strangers. She was released in 2008 after serving less than three years.
Doug was one of the finest people I've ever known, and it burns me up that there's a hole in the world where his wit, music, grace, and future should be. I'm crying at work as I type this, thinking about what his kids would have been like. And of course, it's not just him. The musician and producer Steve Albini wrote a wonderful tribute to Michael Dahlquist here: http://www.chicagoreader.com/pdf/050...22_letters.pdf
I don't forgive her in the slightest. I don't give a shit if she's sorry.
I mentioned this to my colleague when I heard that she was being released from prison; as you might imagine, I was extremely upset. He told me that forgiving the drunk driver who killed his brother was the hardest thing he's ever done, but he did it.
He's a serious Christian, and I'm not a person of faith, but I think that the Christian way of forgiveness is the right one. It's better for the world, and better for the injured person. It's certainly not good for me to bear this anger. I just can't get from here to there.