LI or MD?

Ok, so I don't enjoy writing a, "What should I do with my life?," thread, but here it goes...

I'm originally from the Baltimore/DC area, but moved to NY for grad school. My fiancé is from Long Island, but went to school in the Balt/DC area, where we met. She finished her doctorate a couple years ago and moved back to Long Island and found work (health profession, working a government job). I also just recently graduated with an MA and found a job in NYC (generating stats for a non-profit). We have found a nice little apartment in a Long Island town, where we're able to walk to most shops, restaurants, and bars. We're not entirely happy with living in NY, as it can be very expensive. We worry about affording a home and starting a family down the line. Also, she is growing more dissatisfied with her job. Not because of the work, but because her employer is incompetent and she wishes she could work with a different population. In spite of this, we are growing comfortable with our situation and learning to deal with things.

Fast forward to last night...

My fiancé gets a call from her old job in DC, that a woman in the department left and the position is open for the taking. Now, my fiancé really loved her time working in that position and many of her concerns with her current job would be answered. It starts in April. We had often thought of returning to MD, but not so soon. This raises all sorts of questions, where will we live, what will I do, what about the wedding (it's in October in LI)? We know where we might like to live, either Bethesda or Silver Spring. We figure most of the big plans regarding the wedding have been made, and her family can help with the rest.

My greatest concern is finding another job for myself. I have an MA in sociology with a background in quantitative analysis. The only places I could imagine working are either in NYC (market research) or DC (market research/polling/government). I'm concerned because I feel overwhelmingly lucky to have found a job last spring, let alone something in my field. What are the chances of that happening again?

To make matter worse, since May I've been working 30 hours a week with full benefits. They have just extended my hours to 35, increasing my pay. Additionally, my boss is trying to find money in the budget to give me a raise (a modest raise, but it's something). I'd feel bad turning my back on them, but it could also be an opportunity to strike out and find something better.

And what about moving during the wedding planning, and finding another job?

I know I really shouldn't be voicing all these concerns to some style-based men's clothing forum, but this is my chance to voice these concerns anonymously. Let me know what you guys think, if anything...

Oh, and cue Colin Powell if it's too wordy.

1. My job could be better, and the move could provide an excuse to jump to a different job, preferably better paying. I'm payed ok, but I'd like more.
3. Right now, my fiance makes double what I make... easily. That being said, I'm not going anywhere until I secure a job.
4. Yup, Huntington. It's a nice little town. We'd like to buy something in the area, but we may have to wait a few years. We're concerned about missing out on the buyer's market and the taxes in LI


Yes, both places are extremely different. I would much rather live in Baltimore, but the commute would be an absolute killer. LI is certainly more genuine, and there are more locally owned businesses. I like that to an extent, but sometimes the people here are just so fucking irritating. The thought of bringing another douche baggy Long Islander (I know, they're not all bad) into the world makes my scrotum shrivel.


True, there are a lot of things that I would miss about NY. It's the expense that is killing us. The thought of eating PB&J and Top Ramen to buy a house isn't the most appealing. And then what about kids? It's tough.

I think you are correct about the right opportunity. Had she gotten the call a year or two from now, I think we'd be ready. It's just that we finally settled and gotten comfortable.


Garden City, correct? My fiance has some family in a neighboring area, it seems very nice. The great thing about LI is that the public schools are actually decent. If we moved back to MD, we'd almost certainly enroll our kids in private school.



Thanks for the feedback. There's certainly a lot to figure out, but we still have some time. I guess it's better to have some options, than no options at all.