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Messed up and slept with a colleague... - Page 5

post #61 of 176
This is more than just a minor inconvenience. This could be employment trouble or even legal trouble. If she says "hostile work environment" or similar shit to the right people then you are fucked. My suggestion --seriously-- is to tell her you are embarrassed about what happened and that you are gay. I am not joking here. Gay is the perfect defense to any allegation of sex harassment with a female. You need not actually bugger someone. Simply tell her you are not interested in women.
post #62 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by TGPlastic View Post
My suggestion --seriously-- is to tell her you are embarrassed about what happened and that you are gay. I am not joking here. Gay is the perfect defense to any allegation of sex harassment with a female.

I can understand the desire to be proactive and on the defensive - but tell her that he's gay AFTER he banged her and eye-fucked her countless times before and since? Sounds a bit thin to me, and a sure way to piss her off and put her in a vindictive mood.
post #63 of 176
Thread Starter 
So basically she wants it like every day now... Which is great and complicated at the same time.
post #64 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorkRanger View Post
I did the same thing back when I was single...wound up marrying the girl and having 2 kids...she's still my wife, and we still work together...let it ride man, you never know, one day you may be kicking yourself for abiding by a rule. Matters of the heart (or dick) have no rules.

+1. NYR you sound like my best mate. He started seeing a colleague years ago. They really liked each other and ended up getting married and now have 2 kids too. She was headhunted to another company before they had to "out" their relationship to colleagues / management. Funny thing is, a year later he ended up joining the same company as her (we teased him for being a stalker). Ten years later they are still colleagues, still married and now head up separate divisions for a major TV / media conglomerate. Sleeping with a colleague doesn't always mean you've messed up...
post #65 of 176
Thread Starter 
I doubt anything serious will come out of it, but she is definitely fun...
post #66 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flambeur View Post
So basically she wants it like every day now... Which is great and complicated at the same time.

so what are you doing posting?
post #67 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flambeur View Post
Crap. So I am stuck with this chick for at least a year on a project. I basically spend like 40+ hours a week with her.

She is really hot, smart, interesting, and super sexual. But I'm a strong believer in "don't shit where you eat" philosophy. Long story short: work party, lots of alcohol, wake up naked in bed together.

I really don't know how to handle it properly. I actually like her a lot but don't necessarily think it's a good idea to continue.

fuck,i wish i had your problems.
9 out of 10 guys on here with wives and kids and mortgages are thinking the same thing lol
post #68 of 176
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ninetofivereject View Post
fuck,i wish i had your problems.
9 out of 10 guys on here with wives and kids and mortgages are thinking the same thing lol

yeah but I work really hard on NOT having a wife and kids and a mortgage (well that one I do actually)
post #69 of 176
This actually happened to me once, but I lost interest because she was psycho. It was pretty tough getting rid of her. She acted weird around me in the office. But I don't think she ever blabbed because she wanted to maintain her rep. Also was never on a project team with her. If I was, I'd imagine it would be a very awkward day-to-day situation.

If anything, I'd clearly lay out the boundaries for the relationship off the bat. Friends first, hook up second. Not exclusive. Not serious. She will likely "agree" to this and still go psycho/possessive on you, but at least you can say you told her. Keep on bringing up how you are afraid of hurting her and all that crap because you are not looking for anything serious. If you keep on reinforcing this the (inevitable) aftermath will be less painful, though not painless.
post #70 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flambeur View Post
So basically she wants it like every day now... Which is great and complicated at the same time.

Maybe you should lay out some boundaries, as per Metro. You don't want her going schizo once you actually are in another relationship.
post #71 of 176
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroStyles View Post
This actually happened to me once, but I lost interest because she was psycho. It was pretty tough getting rid of her. She acted weird around me in the office. But I don't think she ever blabbed because she wanted to maintain her rep. Also was never on a project team with her. If I was, I'd imagine it would be a very awkward day-to-day situation.

If anything, I'd clearly lay out the boundaries for the relationship off the bat. Friends first, hook up second. Not exclusive. Not serious. She will likely "agree" to this and still go psycho/possessive on you, but at least you can say you told her. Keep on bringing up how you are afraid of hurting her and all that crap because you are not looking for anything serious. If you keep on reinforcing this the (inevitable) aftermath will be less painful, though not painless.

Quote:
Originally Posted by unjung View Post
Maybe you should lay out some boundaries, as per Metro. You don't want her going schizo once you actually are in another relationship.

Yeah this is definitely something to consider. She's definitely a bit of a crazy type, which is also what makes her so much fun. Fuck. She just left too..
post #72 of 176
Thread Starter 
So it's been 3 or 4 times now. I'm screwed both figuratively and literally.
post #73 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroStyles View Post
This actually happened to me once, but I lost interest because she was psycho. It was pretty tough getting rid of her. She acted weird around me in the office. But I don't think she ever blabbed because she wanted to maintain her rep. Also was never on a project team with her. If I was, I'd imagine it would be a very awkward day-to-day situation.

If anything, I'd clearly lay out the boundaries for the relationship off the bat. Friends first, hook up second. Not exclusive. Not serious. She will likely "agree" to this and still go psycho/possessive on you, but at least you can say you told her. Keep on bringing up how you are afraid of hurting her and all that crap because you are not looking for anything serious. If you keep on reinforcing this the (inevitable) aftermath will be less painful, though not painless.


Working in a family business can be tough.
post #74 of 176
Would the situation be different if the colleague was also male?
Are there restrictions in companies about that too?
-
post #75 of 176
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flambeur View Post
So it's been 3 or 4 times now.

Pictures?
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