Embarassing Sports Plays

I wouldn't qualify as a jock, but here's my story. Senior year of high school and we're at a wrestling meet. After my match, the assistant coach says I wouldn't be wrestling again so I semi suit down (t-shirt over my singlet), throw off my headgear and head to the canteen to get some snacks. 15 minutes later I stroll back in with a loaded hotdog, drink and chocolate bar and the basketball court is in a hush and my teammates run over to me, "dude, where've you been? You're up!". The fucking ref is about to forfeit my match in my absence. I can't find my headgear and have to borrow one from a teammate (oddly no one was falling over themselves to offer theirs). I overhear some fat mothers of the opposing team's players chuckling. I swear to myself I'm going to kick this guys ass. Match starts and I dominate the kid...for the first 45 seconds. My lack of warmup and junk food I just partially wolfed down make me nauseous and weezy, I lose my steam and the guy eventually wins. My assistant coach apologises for his fuck up. Oh and my mom for the one time she came to one of my matches got to watch me lose and look like a dick head.

We were playing our biggest rival in HS, and it was a really great game. This was when Subway had 2-for-1 footlong deals. School got out at 3:10, bus left for the game at 4:00. Just enough time to run to Subway and back. Most of the guys would split up the deal with another teammate, but that day, our center decided he wanted two footlong subs for himself. Flash forward 3 hours. 14 seconds left in the fourth quarter, down by one against our rivals. Me (pointguard) is bringing the ball down the floor on a fast break from breaking a full-court press. Center is sprinting down the lane, looking for the pass. I pass it to him, wide open under the basket. As the ball is in the air, both feet of those subs come back up and center pukes all over the middle of the lane in front of him. Catches the ball, then slips on the puke. Gets whistled for traveling. We have to foul to stop the clock, they clinch the game by three.

during a baseball practice (3rd base) I was too busy trying to flirt with some girls to notice the line drive flying at me. nailed me in the stomach.

I'll soon post an enormous rowing fail. No time now.

During a game against out rivals in baseball- it was a close pitcher's duell. It was 0-0 in the bottom of the 6th and I zone out temporarily in left field. Our pitcher was a hard throwing kid and basically nothing was hit to me the entire game. There were two outs and a runner on first... I temporarily space out and as I yawn a linedrive is hit right over my head. I don't even notice it and the runner on first scores on a triple.....

I played corner back in high school. Probably because I have monolithic stone hands. I got fooled by a reverse so this receiver was coming around to my side but I messed up the contain. I desperately dove at him and ended up putting my helmet into the safety's knee in a nonbendy direction. His season over In college I joined a coed softball team. For some reason I thought it would be cool to run around the bases and slide into homeplate during BP. Homeplate was on astroturf. Foot caught, ankle POP

I don't want to completely derail your thread, but you went to HS in St. Pete? I'm definitely a product of Pinellas County Schools. I was in the north end of the county, but I had a couple of friends to who went to St. Pete for IB before they opened Palm Harbor University HS.

I was a middling baseball player on a decent team. Senior year I was a starting OF, this one particular game against Mt. St. Joseph (a local team, always quite good) I was in RF. Some big kid comes up to hit, lefty, and absolutely rocks a ball. I know it's hit in my general direction, but I lose the ball off the bat. Everyone turns to look at me, and all I can do is hold my hands out and shrug. There's no fence at this field, but there was an enclosed batting cage about 380 feet out - way behind me. Suddenly I hear a big clunk behind me, turn around, and see the ball bounding back towards me. Absolutely should have been a home run, and I think should have been called that way given the ground rules of the field, but the ump must have lost it too. I ran back, scooped it up, double. Not a confidence-inspiring moment for the coaching staff in my ability.

Later I found out the hitter was Mark Teixeira, who must have been a freshman or sophomore at the time.

Another good baseball one - We had a great, all-state-level catcher my junior year. I got a few starts in OF but rode a lot of pine. Well, coach decided we needed a backup catcher and I was the right size. I'd played ball my whole life, but never catcher, and I am a big flincher - I just reflexively cringe and jump at sudden movements and sounds. Anyways, I get a few weeks of practice in just catching pitchers in the 'pen, and maybe 1 BP session with live hitting, and some training on how to block balls, but I'm hardly a real catcher. One of our pitchers threw a nasty curveball that, even in warmups, I had only caught cleanly a handful of times.

Well, big game (against St. Joe again - though this was a year prior to the last story), I'm primarily concerned with my sunflower seeds, and suddenly our catcher tweaks something. I'm not really paying attention when I hear the coach say "Doug H---, get your gear on!" After a mild panic I manage to clip the pads on. (Catcher's pads, if you've never put them on, are a massive PITA.) Well, sure enough, the pitcher is our curveball specialist, and there's a runner on third, and we're up by one. First pitch is a 59-footer and I have to go down for the block and make a great one. Suddenly, I'm confident. But the second pitch I drop. Third pitch, too. Then the fourth pitch, fastball inside corner, swing and miss, and I also completely whiff the catch. It hits the ump in the bare hand and he's clutching it in pain, and swearing at me. "Catch the fucking ball, son!" All I could do was apologize and stammer, "I'm not really a catcher."

Ouch.

(I did redeem myself soon after, as the next hitter grounded to third and we cut down the runner at the plate; I held on despite him trying to run me over, which was illegal anyways and he got tossed from the game. And thank god, our catcher came back into the game. In hindsight, I'm not sure how that was legal, but whatever.)

My junior year in high school I decided to quit the Varsity Baseball team to run track with my friends (the baseball team was full of pricks). However I still played some local Babe Ruth or whatever the 16 year old league ball is. Fast forward towards the end of the track season, state qualifiers are coming up and based on my times for the 110m hurdles I should have easily qualified for states. The night before the quals I had a baseball game, sliding into second on a stolen base I twist my ankle pretty badly under the bag...no state qualifiers and no state meet for me...epic fail.

Most embarassing moment in the history of sports right here:

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After a less than stellar 8+ season and a following difficult break up of the boat a teammate and I rowed the 2-. The season was nearly over and we took it easy. We were enjoying the sun, the flat water and the fact that we kicked major ass.

Race day:

First race of the weekend was (only) a 500m sprint. We where fastest of the starting line. We Raced to a 2-3 boat lenght lead in 100m (which is almost unbelievable). Our rhythm, our strokes were perfect. We were awesome!

But there was a lot of flag waving. The name of our rowing club was called a lot. Oh no! A false start. The boat two lanes next to us stopped. Now we were sure! We stopped to race (and win) again.

1 Mississippi

2 Mississippi

3 Mississippi

... and the field passed us by.

In the end and after 5 minutes of swearing and all around sporting behaviour on our part we found out the red flag means a false start. The white flag is used for stearing instructions. In this case meant for two old teammates in another lane.

The rest of the day we spend explaining that, no we did not stear into the reed. We were just stupid.

Right up there has to be the Canseco head homerun.