Originally Posted by rach2jlc
I agree... but I think that's too easy and that's my problem. Our loved ones deserve more than that... more than just "social politeness," I think. I think the automatic "I'm sorry for you" is a sham and of the dozens of forums on which I've been... they are ALWAYS offered in a general, blanket fashion when these types of threads come up. I've lost a LOT of people in my life, for as young as I am... and I just think it's all phony.
Again, I'm not going to go down with that ship, because I'm not going to tell ANYBODY how to express grief. I just wanted to at least TRY to add that REAL people, REAL loved ones, are worth more than our "polite" offers of sympathy. Thus, I think we shouldn't solicit them from others online, or offer them ourselves.
And, that why decided to make that issue on that thread, though perhaps misplaced, nevertheless does NOT warrant disciplinary action.
You know, I posted condolences in that thread, not because I knew the OP or the extent of his loss - I just assumed it was a big loss to him, being his mother and such a surprise. Maybe this is a knee-jerk reaction, maybe his mom deserves more, maybe the world is a poorer place and this passing deserves more than a quickly-typed sentence.
I totally see where you and why are coming from with your comments, and I agree with you to a point that a lot of polite sympathy is short-lived at best, and at times is a sham.
But that said, I do genuinely wish the OP well, and that quickly-typed sentence is all I can offer. I think I'd rather do that little bit to comfort the OP than just walk by the thread and keep quiet.