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Dating Advice.. (omg so lame, I know) - Page 6

post #76 of 237
9/19/09 at 11:24pm
i've dated many women in their 20s. based on what she's posted so far, the OP is exactly the kind of woman i hate seeing, and that i see too often. please god, send me a woman of substance. seed, who hijacks threads
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post #77 of 237
9/19/09 at 11:32pm
Getting defensive and bragging about your LSAT score when somebody cracks a joke?
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post #78 of 237
9/20/09 at 1:56am
The best part is all the people that one starred the thread.
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post #79 of 237
9/20/09 at 2:40am
jesus christ what fresh hell is in this thread and i say this as a ruthlessly attractive man
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post #80 of 237
9/21/09 at 2:48am
this is awesome.
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post #81 of 237
9/21/09 at 6:06am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dakota rube View Post
This is when you say, "oh, you're a nice guy, but I really think we'd both be wasting our time..." He'll get over it.

Clarity is best
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post #82 of 237
9/21/09 at 5:17pm
Enjoyable read so far to get the view from inside a female mind, and updates are required.

If the this is the same The Snob I believe it is, then she is definitely female and potentially very attractive (pics weren't very revealing) and quite interesting to read.
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post #83 of 237
9/21/09 at 5:30pm
I remember when Claire posted here often. I always appreciated reading a female perspective.
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post #84 of 237
9/21/09 at 5:31pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Snob View Post
SPEAKING OF FIRST DATES: I am a really nice, charming, and wee bit humbler person when live believe it or not. The niceness extends to a point where I have a hard time saying "No" to people in general and often give off indications of interest through my smiley-ness and my general warmth (though I shy away from physical advances) unwittingly. How do I give a clear indication to a guy on date 1 that I'm not interested in date 2 without being rude? I mean, if they say something offhandedly like, "This was great! We should do it again", it's kind of a necessity that I respond with some affirmative, "Yeah!" to avoid an awkward situation (although one guy finally picked up on the way I sound when I say "Yeah" fakely... it gets all high pitched--although he didnt seem to notice this when he suggested a second date on our first date and I automatically dove into fake high-pitched Yeah mode). Then I'm stuck feeling guilty when contact comes through for date 2. It doesn't feel right to just ignore them when asked out again especially when they insisted on paying for dinner last time. Guilt! Ugh.
Respond with a non-committal "It was nice to meet you" and stick out your hand for a handshake. Most men will get the message. If a man still contacts you after that, respond, "I enjoyed meeting you, but do not think we have sufficient chemistry for a second date." Don't offer to be friends; everybody knows that's a phony gesture meant to assuage the guilt of the rejecter and the feelings of the rejectee.
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post #85 of 237
9/21/09 at 6:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ambulance Chaser View Post
Respond with a non-committal "It was nice to meet you" and stick out your hand for a handshake. Most men will get the message. If a man still contacts you after that, respond, "I enjoyed meeting you, but do not think we have sufficient chemistry for a second date." Don't offer to be friends; everybody knows that's a phony gesture meant to assuage the guilt of the rejecter and the feelings of the rejectee.

+1. Either a polite "I enjoyed meeting you" (handshake unnecessary), without responding to his mention of a second date will send the right message, or a more direct refusal is best. Stringing someone along because you're not assertive enough to hurt his feelings is not cool and wastes everyone's time.
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post #86 of 237
9/21/09 at 8:45pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Snob View Post
Well, it's true that the picture is important, but I've gotta say, you men have it going for you in terms of getting dressed to appeal to women. Seriously... a good wardrobe really covers like 90% of the flaws (not if the flaws are 90 extra pounds, but you get the idea).

When I lived in LA, I knew men who made it a rule never to sleep with a woman until they'd seen her in a bathing suit or workout clothes.

Expensive tailoring can hide too many flaws you don't see until she's naked. The sooner you got an accurate read of her body, the better.

I think of that rule every evening at the gym. I see women walk in on their way to the locker room and their corporate babe/banker/lawyer outfits make them look hot as hell.

A few minutes later, they're in shorts and t-shirt and I'm happy as hell I didn't have to caress her inner thigh to discover she's a porker.
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post #87 of 237
9/21/09 at 11:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by sjg22 View Post
An amazing insight into the mind of women: the OP literally, over the course a thread, went from wondering what, if anything, the fact that a guy didn't call for 2 days (2 DAYS!) meant, to basically talking herself into thinking the guy was a jerk because of it. I'm thinking this 35 year old guy probably has some stuff going on in his life, such as a wife and kids, and so he wasn't actively deciding every minute to not call you. Don't read so much into things.

Edited for accuracy.
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post #88 of 237
9/22/09 at 12:33am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by ConcernedParent View Post
The best part is all the people that one starred the thread.
Aww, make-a me teh sad Well at least now we've bounced up to 2 STARS! Woohoo!
Quote:
Originally Posted by EnglishGent View Post
Enjoyable read so far to get the view from inside a female mind, and updates are required. If the this is the same The Snob I believe it is, then she is definitely female and potentially very attractive (pics weren't very revealing) and quite interesting to read.
Haha, glad you appreciate it. I don't recall having a photo on here... but it's very possible... before I started this thread, I wasn't obsessed with hiding my identity. haha.. but yes, I am potentially very attractive! ;p SO some updates for those of you that aren't one-starring me (): I emailed my numero uno paramour back on Sunday morning after one of my guy friends advised me to do so no later than 11am on Sunday. He also said I was being ridiculous and that it's a good thing I have him (and, incidentally, the rest of you) as an outlet for my cray-cray behaviour instead of texting my paramour 24/7. This is true! I need an outlet! Thank you for being that outlet! So in my email I was playful and coy.. can't be too eager, after all! I suggested Tuesday evening.. or Wednesday evening post-dinner drinks.. or a weekend brunch. I'm busy the other days... and not just fake busy but actually really busy (not a loser despite what some of you might think!). As yet.. NO RESPONSE! Oh, gone was the empowerment I initially felt when I hadn't responded to him. Cometh, once more, the insecurity felt as a smitten woman pining after her man! Grrr. This is not boding well for a future. He is clearly very busy or he is clearly just "not that into me" since tomorrow is Tuesday and well, clearly there won't be a full date tomorrow at this rate! I mean, obvs, if he responds tomorrow asking for my hand tomorrow evening, I'll have to fake a full social calendar and deny him that luxury ;p IN OTHER NEWS: I was supposed to go out to brunch yesterday with another one of my potential suitors. Since I got back to my place at 5am on Saturday and felt like utter shite the next morning, I postponed that meeting until tonight. Just got back from our little winebar evening... and well, hooray for me! I have someone else now to possibly occupy my thoughts with aside from my Number One. (lol). I'm not CRAZY physically attracted to him (alas, he does not have the salt & pepper going), but his personality is quite engaging and I do like to laugh... like a mirthful, wholehearted laugh.. with no fear that my contorted face in real laughter is unattractive. Yeah, laughing is important. So, guy number 2 he will now be. And yeah, he is definitely calling me soon unless I misread him horribly. Gosh, I'm like 7-1 or something at this point with my 1st date responses (the 1 being the short guy who seemed to freak out at my, frankly, quite average height) Let's see who else has sent me some match.com email recently ;p
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post #89 of 237
9/22/09 at 12:36am
Don't say obvs! I am addicted to your thread. That was quick.
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post #90 of 237
9/22/09 at 12:39am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by zr0e View Post
Don't say obvs! I am addicted to your thread. That was quick.

I love saying obvs.
It's like totez my thing ... sort of rebelling against my anti-valleygirl personality.

It's wut we do. Just go read jezebel.com. You will understand.
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Styleforum › Forums › Lifestyle › Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel › Dating Advice.. (omg so lame, I know)