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What to wear if you're unattractive - Page 3

post #31 of 48
??? Max are you attracted to men?
post #32 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flame
??? Max are you attracted to men?
That's a rather inane question.
post #33 of 48
He does seems to have very strange preferences.
post #34 of 48
I would not consider homosexuality to be either a "preference" or "strange." However, I also did not infer any "preferences" from the posting.
post #35 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flame
He does seems to have very strange preferences.


what's so strange? do you think this is a site only for hetrosexuals?
post #36 of 48
That's true. The Fab 5 probably browse this site. Especially Carson Kressley.
post #37 of 48
I'm open to people of all sexual orientations, but Max seems to alternate between talking about women and men. I find this confusing, and my question is just a personal one to clear things up. edit: He admits his orientation in a previous post.
post #38 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by hotspur
I have been wondering lately if it is worth trying to dress nice if you belong to the so-called genetic lower class. I pose this question particularly to those currently attending a university. Reguardless of your success in academics, or how fit or wealthy you may be; is there purpose in drawing attention to yourself with attractive clothing if you yourself are not so. I recently found myself at a fraternity that I usually do not goto, and was amoungst a crowd of attractive, very outgoing people who immediately made me feel self conscious. I do not think that I am unattractive, but when you find yourself amoung a class of very unaverage people, it can easily seem so. Sometimes I feel like it may almost be a mockery, to try and look nice when the first feature everyone notices is something you cannot change by how you dress. On the other hand there is no virtue in dressing like a slob. What are your opinions on this?
I would suggest that you take the money a fine wardrobe would cost and apply it to the cost of therapy for your self-esteem, or the absence thereof. A course in genetics might also be appropriate to dispell your notion of a "genetic lower class".
post #39 of 48
As far as self-esteem goes, "fake it 'til you make it" is not a bad cliche to adopt. Go to some club or bar off-campus where you don't know anyone and where you can feel relatively safe in experimenting, and just "act" like you have self-confidence.

Before you go, in your mind's eye, imagine an actor who looks and sounds exactly like you, except that he interacts with people in the confident, self-assured manner that you aspire to. Play around with that image in your mind until it's clear, and then go out one night, and "play" that character in real life, as if you're doing an acting exercise. It will help you start to develop a new way of interacting.

Be patient with yourself, though, if you're used to carrying yourself a particular way, it won't change permanently overnight, but you can train yourself to develop a different physical presence, and that can help shift your mental attitude.
post #40 of 48
As many have said, personality and presence trump looks. I also think that a great speaking voice and nice laugh do wonders for anyone. The good news is that a little speech/vocal coaching can help just about anyone achieve a nice vocal presence.
post #41 of 48
There's an unfortunate assertion about appearance in this thread. Many people would be upset to read the research papers about how socially significant appearance is.
post #42 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by mensimageconsultant.com
There's an unfortunate assertion about appearance in this thread. Many people would be upset to read the research papers about how socially significant appearance is.

What do you mean? I'd be interested if you'd elaborate, though it's likely to be controversial. I don't read the literature in the area; all I've seen are a few "tests" done by news magazines, where the better-looking subjects are almost universally better-treated. I consider this "evidence" to be anecdotal at best. Are these results supported by real studies, with real controls?
post #43 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by lawyerdad
Have you tried that line in one of gorgekko's bars?
Lines are for losers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mensimageconsultant.com
There's an unfortunate assertion about appearance in this thread. Many people would be upset to read the research papers about how socially significant appearance is.
I don't think anyone said that attractiveness wasn't important or how much of a role it plays, I think we're all just saying that walking around thinking you're the ugly duckling doesn't serve much of a purpose. You've already lost the battle if you walk into every social situation thinking that you're the loser in the room.
post #44 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by gorgekko
Lines are for losers.

That's not a bad line
post #45 of 48
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucky Strike
That's not a bad line

I'm in a conundrum. If I use it, I'll be using a line. If I don't use it, it's obvious wisdom is unstated.

Sigh. See, if I was a pretty boy, I could make a decision...
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