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"I wear what I like" - Page 3

post #31 of 51
whatever you wear is ok, no need to be so worried. if you're spending too much money, you may think if maybe you are trying to fill emotional gaps in your life by buying clothes? in any case it can be a nice, healthy interest. to have an aesthetic sense is good... caring about clothes is good... just as not caring is also acceptable. the way people see you, especially when you meet new people, is influenced by some extent by your choices in what you wear. so it's natural that, if you're worried about what people will think, or if you're just being practical and not rigid in your beliefs, you'll want to give a certain image of yourself to them. you're passing an image - want it or not - and the importance of all this depends on how much you care about it... the money is yours, do whatever you want. buying confortable, quality, functional clothes is logical, but buying clothes that make you feel good also makes sense.
post #32 of 51
I wear what I like = "I dress the way I do, because the people who won't like how I dress, I don't care for. The people who will like how I dress, I want to attract." We pick our social group, and we dress around that.
post #33 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by dare-
I wear what I like = "I dress the way I do, because the people who won't like how I dress, I don't care for. The people who will like how I dress, I want to attract."

We pick our social group, and we dress around that.

That's true.

What image consultants - or at least those who have been influenced by Conselle's philosophy - would disagree with is the idea of not caring about the impression made to those outside the social group. Why make needless enemies? Why not promote some brotherhood among men? (While still respecting individuality and subgroups.)

If you find philosophy boring or irrelevant, consider this:
Many people who dress badly at work are dressing for a social group that they belong to, or used to belong to, outside of work.
post #34 of 51
It's funny, walking around in public, I look at people and look at what they wear and wonder to myself, "Does this person not care about fashion and how they look or do they just have awful style? Or am I the one with bad taste?"

Anyway, I'd have to disagree that people pick their social groups and dress for those people. Out of my friends, I'm the only one that is really concious about fashion and style, while my peers have probably dressed the same for the past 5 years. Additionally, I'm not trying to 'attact' anyone in particular with my style. When I get dressed I don't say, "This is the type of girl I want to meet, and she might like these pieces in my closet." Style is a personal satisfaction, not outwardly influenced. Ninety-nine percent of my friends and peers are Caucasion (I'm Chinese), and the places we go out are of similar demographic--Former frat/sorority members who wear THE uniform. I don't conciously dress different just to be different--I just have different style and if someone finds that attractive, great, if not, no biggie.

I saw an interview with Pharrell (whether you like/dislike his style, the fact is, he has major style) and he said it was funny that he was always on the list of best dressed because his friends used to laugh and clown on his style.
post #35 of 51
Hi,

The point about Pharrell is key. Men report dressing less for approval than do women, but in certain groups, teasing and other negative feedback keep guys from taking risks. It's like an embarrassing continuation of adolescence, which might lead to deliberate avoidance or denial of approval-seeking.

Also interesting is that, according to some research, males indicate consciously communicating to others through clothes about as much as females do. Women, however, seem to more often use specific outfits to send messages (semiotics), like on dates.
post #36 of 51
Quote:
LA Guy, who only wears flares.

Heh heh, that made me laugh.....I thought one of the reasons that LA Guy and I got in an argument before was because he said they were clearly NOT flares?.....Either way, my comment is completely off topic; I have to watch my back now that I am in enemy territory......

Besides, we are all buddy buddy now right?

ahah hahahah
post #37 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by mensimageconsultant.com
Hi,

The point about Pharrell is key. Men report dressing less for approval than do women, but in certain groups, teasing and other negative feedback keep guys from taking risks. It's like an embarrassing continuation of adolescence, which might lead to deliberate avoidance or denial of approval-seeking.

Also interesting is that, according to some research, males indicate consciously communicating to others through clothes about as much as females do. Women, however, seem to more often use specific outfits to send messages (semiotics), like on dates.

I didn't make my comment about Pharrell very well, let me clarify. He didn't say he changed his style because his friends clowned him, he thought it was funny that he was on 'best dressed' lists, EVEN THOUGH his friends made fun of his style. Sorry for the poor wording. I hope that didn't ruin your point.
post #38 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by VENDER
It's funny, walking around in public, I look at people and look at what they wear and wonder to myself, "Does this person not care about fashion and how they look or do they just have awful style? Or am I the one with bad taste?" Anyway, I'd have to disagree that people pick their social groups and dress for those people. Out of my friends, I'm the only one that is really concious about fashion and style, while my peers have probably dressed the same for the past 5 years. Additionally, I'm not trying to 'attact' anyone in particular with my style. When I get dressed I don't say, "This is the type of girl I want to meet, and she might like these pieces in my closet." Style is a personal satisfaction, not outwardly influenced. Ninety-nine percent of my friends and peers are Caucasion (I'm Chinese), and the places we go out are of similar demographic--Former frat/sorority members who wear THE uniform. I don't conciously dress different just to be different--I just have different style and if someone finds that attractive, great, if not, no biggie. I saw an interview with Pharrell (whether you like/dislike his style, the fact is, he has major style) and he said it was funny that he was always on the list of best dressed because his friends used to laugh and clown on his style.
Of course, I state my rule not as a universal law. I mean, that generally, that's how it is. I'm very skeptical of those who elevate their clothes to a high moral ground: "Those other people, they dress to belong, while I dress to express my true self." Our true selves must be small things indeed, if they can be expressed by clothes. The clothes we wear, we wear for a purpose. Beyond protection from the elements and comfort, we want our clothes to evoke a reaction from others. Most of the time, to signal that we belong to some group. That group may not be who we are friends with.
post #39 of 51
this is sort of on topic.. im soooo temped to buy these neon yellow jeans from julian red: some of you may or may not be familiar. anyway.. i realize they arent practical and they are pretty crazy, but i think they'd be fun for summer. obviously they don't have a long life-line, so should I just bite my lip and not buy them?
post #40 of 51
If you can pull off the yellow jean look, more power to you! For me, they'd be a "wtf was i thinking" purchase.....and I have a lot of colorful stuff in my closet!
post #41 of 51
If you were in Nantucket and they had navy blue embroidered whales on them, they'd be very trad.
post #42 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by dare-
Of course, I state my rule not as a universal law. I mean, that generally, that's how it is. I'm very skeptical of those who elevate their clothes to a high moral ground: "Those other people, they dress to belong, while I dress to express my true self." Our true selves must be small things indeed, if they can be expressed by clothes.

The clothes we wear, we wear for a purpose. Beyond protection from the elements and comfort, we want our clothes to evoke a reaction from others. Most of the time, to signal that we belong to some group. That group may not be who we are friends with.


Point respected. I agree that many people dress to belong to a certain group. But, don't you feel in a society where looks and personal appearance weigh so heavily (as superficial and disgusting as it is), clothing magnifies our personal traits.
post #43 of 51
Sorry if this interrupting, but the subject is this company's specialty.

To quote Conselle, "you cannot not communicate." Clothes always say something about the wearer, though it goes through observer filters and might not be what somebody wants to say. (People who realize they are communicating badly and don't know how to change it often become disinterested in style and sometimes even socially avoidant.)

But clothing does not necessarily magnify traits. For example, it can be used to counter messages sent by the physique and face.

Because of that and the complexity of personality, simple outfits like tee shirts with jeans (the default for many fashion-averse American men) often don't communicate effectively.
post #44 of 51
I disagree. In fact, I would say that something simple and universally worn like a t-shirt and jeans, and which the majority of men are comfortable in, comunicates extremely effectively. The fit and brand of the jeans, the fit of the t-shirt and any graphics or embellishments on it, are much more likely to communicate someone's personality than, say, a suit and tie, which I would say the majority of men feel is a sort of costume.

A guy in a relaxed fit plain tee and GAP jeans, a guy in embellished Diesel jeans and a tight ASOS tee, and a guy in a fitted Jil Sander tee and raw, slim jeans clearly belong to different "social tribes" and espouse different aesthetics.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mensimageconsultant.com
Sorry if this interrupting, but the subject is this company's specialty.

To quote Conselle, "you cannot not communicate." Clothes always say something about the wearer, though it goes through observer filters and might not be what somebody wants to say. (People who realize they are communicating badly and don't know how to change it often become disinterested in style and sometimes even socially avoidant.)

But clothing does not necessarily magnify traits. For example, it can be used to counter messages sent by the physique and face.

Because of that and the complexity of personality, simple outfits like tee shirts with jeans (the default for many fashion-averse American men) often don't communicate effectively.
post #45 of 51
Quote:
Originally Posted by LA Guy
The fit and brand of the jeans, the fit of the t-shirt and any graphics or embellishments on it, are much more likely to communicate someone's personality than, say, a suit and tie, which I would say the majority of men feel is a sort of costume.

A guy in a relaxed fit plain tee and GAP jeans, a guy in embellished Diesel jeans and a tight ASOS tee, and a guy in a fitted Jil Sander tee and raw, slim jeans clearly belong to different "social tribes" and espouse different aesthetics.

true, but then you can have 3 guys wearing suits/tie and look completely different from one another, showing that the 3 suited guys have zero in common, socially. Whether or not anyone admits it, EVERYONE belongs to a social tribe of some sort. Even those who choose not to be "fashionable" are engaging in a fashion of sorts.
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