Ebay Etiquette

Hello all,

I purchased and paid for a tie on Tuesday from a somewhat high volume seller on ebay. The listing said that delivery would be within 5-6 days of payment. The seller has yet to ship the tie. I'm pretty confident the seller won't overnight it (to get it to me on time). Plus, I know the seller is around because he/she responded to a question of mine the following day.

From other threads, I know some of you are reflexively defensive of ebay sellers, so my question isn't directed to you. For everyone else, what is the appropriate course of action?

Should I send a friendly message asking if the tie has shipped? If the tie arrives late, should I just leave neutral feedback? (I wouldn't consider negative feedback to be appropriate unless it was a week late or such). Something else?

Before I hear excuses from the "reflexively defensive," I'll just say I don't buy the argument that sellers shouldn't be dinged (I don't mean negative feedback) for not shipping on time (especially if they don't send a message or email informing me that it will be late). I have a very demanding day job and yet I can ship out the things I sell within a day or two, tops. So, that said, what is appropriate here?

Thanks all

I'm a very patient person so take my advice with a grain of salt. After a week if you haven't received any notification that the seller has shipped the item, you should send them a friendly reminder.

But I have waited a month for an item and still left positive feedback, I try not to leave neutral or negative unless my experience has been really negative.

That being said, is the tie needed urgently?

I hate e-bay. But I would say, suck it up, buttercup. Did you need this tie for a specific event and this need was communicated to the seller? If not, and you're just annoyed that you won't receive it within the 5-6 business days as stipulated, well, best you can do is follow up with the seller. At this point it doesn't seem you doubt you'll actually receive the tie - just not in the expected time frame. Sure you can give neutral feed back. I don't know how the new system works since I hate ebay and haven't been on it for a while, but expect the same.

As an active buyer on e-bay, strongly recommend a reminder e-mail. Do not hesitate. Do not be shy. Most sellers understand/appreciate. Communication is good.

I don't need the tie for anything in particular. I'm just excited to get it.

signed,
buttercup

Not sure I agree that you should leave neutral or even negative feedback in this case. I believe you should leave positive feedback if the tie actually matches the listing in terms of quality/condition and just give the seller a poor rating in the "detailed seller rating" for shipping time. Considering the number of horror stories I hear about ebay these days anyone actually shipping what they advertise deserves positive feedback as far as I am concerned /U.

Originally Posted by UFN

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Not sure I agree that you should leave neutral or even negative feedback in this case. I believe you should leave positive feedback if the tie actually matches the listing in terms of quality/condition and just give the seller a poor rating in the "detailed seller rating" for shipping time. Considering the number of horror stories I hear about ebay these days anyone actually shipping what they advertise deserves positive feedback as far as I am concerned

/U.

Ah, that's a good idea. I haven't actually messed with the "detailed seller ratings" yet. Assuming the tie is only a few days late, positive feedback with a low score for shipping sounds reasonable.

I have only left negative feedback once in 10 years and it was the result of seller who took nearly a month to get me an item, and only after I filed a claim with PayPal. Still, if he had responded to ONE of the nearly 10 attempts to contact him, it would have been fine. He said, after the fact, that he had a family emergency. However, he was listing new items throughout the period of time that I was waiting for my item, and racked up several negatives from other pissed off buyers. Still, in the end I messed with E-bay for a solid hour trying to see if I could retract the Feedback, since I felt bad.

My advice is a reminder e-mail and no negative, or even neutral feedback unless it is a really bad experience. When you leave feedback, you can complain about the slow shipping, but still leave a positive.

Mike

Just dont leave a 1 or 2 on the dsr (they have a new deal on 1's and 2's on the dsr's) Not getting the tie in the time that you expected is not a reason to give them poor numbers just because of that. Did the shipping say business days? That would allow the seller to not ship till Wednesday of the next week following the "business rules" stated in the ad. We all have bought stuff online and expected it to get there sooner than it did. Does it stop you from buying from them...not usually if it's a good deal. And that's usually what you get on Ebay...a good deal.

Originally Posted by MBreinin

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I have only left negative feedback once in 10 years and it was the result of seller who took nearly a month to get me an item, and only after I filed a claim with PayPal. Still, if he had responded to ONE of the nearly 10 attempts to contact him, it would have been fine. He said, after the fact, that he had a family emergency. However, he was listing new items throughout the period of time that I was waiting for my item, and racked up several negatives from other pissed off buyers. Still, in the end I messed with E-bay for a solid hour trying to see if I could retract the Feedback, since I felt bad.

My advice is a reminder e-mail and no negative, or even neutral feedback unless it is a really bad experience. When you leave feedback, you can complain about the slow shipping, but still leave a positive.

Mike

Originally Posted by Stewie

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Just dont leave a 1 or 2 on the dsr (they have a new deal on 1's and 2's on the dsr's) Not getting the tie in the time that you expected is not a reason to give them poor numbers just because of that. Did the shipping say business days? That would allow the seller to not ship till Wednesday of the next week following the "business rules" stated in the ad. We all have bought stuff online and expected it to get there sooner than it did. Does it stop you from buying from them...not usually if it's a good deal. And that's usually what you get on Ebay...a good deal.

+1 - eBay's rating system is screwy so my inclination is to give positive even though I could nit-pick and rate lower - but that may unfairly hurt the seller. On the other hand, maybe the seller's been doing it alot but no one's wanted to leave neutral or negative.

It just seems that the eBay less-than-positive penalty is excessive for sellers - so, my free advice is to take your time on leaving feedback. I find that after a week or two has passed and I have the item then I'm feeling mellower and leave positive feedback - for what it's worth.

Originally Posted by magogian12345

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Hello all, Should I send a friendly message asking if the tie has shipped?
This. Also, if it's a high volume seller, be patient as they probably have a lot of stuff to deal with. If the tie arrives and is in the condition described but shipping was slow, don't leave a neutral - leave a postive and just give them a lower star rating on the DSR.

How do you know he hasn't shipped it?

As in life in general, the quicker you are to be a jerk, the bigger douche you are.

I sometimes wonder how people have the time and energy to devote to such incredibly trivial stuff. He hasn't shipped your tie in the three days since you paid for it -- or hasn't notified you that he sent it -- and already you're online mapping out your revenge?

I find this type of thing boggling.

Originally Posted by DocHolliday

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How do you know he hasn't shipped it?

As in life in general, the quicker you are to be a jerk, the bigger douche you are.

I sometimes wonder how people have the time and energy to devote to such incredibly trivial stuff. He hasn't shipped your tie in the three days since you paid for it -- or hasn't sent you a notirfication that he sent it -- and already you're online mapping out your revenge?

I find this type of thing boggling.

Yes, I'm "mapping out [my] revenge." Next, I'm going to ask for directions to the person's house. Lol.

Death by friendly reminders!!!

Originally Posted by magogian12345

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Yes, I'm "mapping out [my] revenge." Next, I'm going to ask for directions to the person's house. Lol.

Call it what you want, it's still douchey.

Originally Posted by DocHolliday

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Call it what you want, it's still douchey. As is your pathetic effort to point out a simple typo.

Seriously, get some perspective.

Wow, calm the F down.

I didn't notice any typo. I was showing how I was changing your quote to fit into my sentence structure. Go be a jerk on another thread.