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honestly what the f**k is hpnotiq

post #1 of 18
7/23/09 at 2:37am
Thread Starter 
stupidass blue girly crap, that's what

god bless my lovely mother but what the hell is going on when she starts stocking this crap next to the cuvees and the fucking pinot grigios

nevermind that it's a brilliant toilet-bowl-cleaner blue and smells like crap; the bottle doesn't help either. "an exquisite blend of premium vodka, natural tropical fruit juices and a hint of cognac" indeed. reminds me of those sri lankan blended whiskies that add a few drops of johnnie walker red just so they can advertise themselves as a "select blend of the finest scotch and local whiskies"

im sure some of you are bewildered by my irritation but im trying to imbibe over here, and since this is a new house the bar hasn't been set up yet, i'm limited to hpnotiq

do you understand? I WANT TO GET DRUNK AND THIS IS THE ONLY CRAP IN THE GODDAMN HOUSE
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post #2 of 18
7/23/09 at 2:42am
Why don't you just hit the vino?
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post #3 of 18
7/23/09 at 2:46am
its marketed towards "urban" markets I believe. Kind of like Alize.
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post #4 of 18
7/23/09 at 2:47am
Thread Starter 
well i polished off a bottle earlier and didnt want to drink too much more of the good stuff i don't know why but i have insomnia these days, can't sleep before 2-3. oh who am i kidding ive had this for years anyway my glass of hpnotiq (what a dumb spelling) is still sitting here untouched. i can't bring myself to sip it well here goes nothing i guess
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post #5 of 18
7/23/09 at 3:07am
I'd let you have a sip of my Maker's if you live nearby.
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post #6 of 18
7/23/09 at 3:13am
Thread Starter 
you know what it's actually not that bad if you pretend youre drinking mouthwash. recessionary periods call for self-sacrifice i guess and yeah xericx i remember when i was in new orleans a bunch of my college comrades would bring this shit to parties, and they were basically as "urban" as it gets
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post #7 of 18
7/23/09 at 3:20am
Yup...mix it with Hennessey and make "Incredible Hulks" Urban stuff for sure
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post #8 of 18
7/23/09 at 3:29am
Quote:
Originally Posted by oman View Post
stupidass blue girly crap, that's what im sure some of you are bewildered by my irritation but im trying to imbibe over here, and since this is a new house the bar hasn't been set up yet, i'm limited to hpnotiq

do you understand? I WANT TO GET DRUNK AND THIS IS THE ONLY CRAP IN THE GODDAMN HOUSE

"hpnotiq" - it must be a late arrival or carryover from Zoolander. I think it's to complement the "Derelique" line.
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post #9 of 18
7/23/09 at 3:35am
Thread Starter 
it is taking me more time to finish this glass than it took me to finish a bottle of shiraz far from being relaxing, this drink is actually making me more tense this is some kind of fucking miracle drink. someone call those bastards at AA - tell them we've found an actual cure for the disease
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post #10 of 18
7/23/09 at 10:52am
Buddy, go through your mom's shit and look for these pills:



Take just one. O.K.? It's blue, yes, but nothing like your trendy Hpnotiq. It has a history of being more suburban than urban.
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post #11 of 18
7/23/09 at 11:05am
Go to the store and steal or buy something better.
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post #12 of 18
7/23/09 at 2:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by oman View Post
stupidass blue girly crap, that's what god bless my lovely mother but what the hell is going on when she starts stocking this crap next to the cuvees and the fucking pinot grigios nevermind that it's a brilliant toilet-bowl-cleaner blue and smells like crap; the bottle doesn't help either. "an exquisite blend of premium vodka, natural tropical fruit juices and a hint of cognac" indeed. reminds me of those sri lankan blended whiskies that add a few drops of johnnie walker red just so they can advertise themselves as a "select blend of the finest scotch and local whiskies" im sure some of you are bewildered by my irritation but im trying to imbibe over here, and since this is a new house the bar hasn't been set up yet, i'm limited to hpnotiq do you understand? I WANT TO GET DRUNK AND THIS IS THE ONLY CRAP IN THE GODDAMN HOUSE
The unasked question is since when does your mama spend her nights at the club with 50 Cent? You might want to check into that, then go by your own shit.
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post #13 of 18
7/23/09 at 4:44pm
Want to make it even worse? Hypnotiq Bombs!
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post #14 of 18
7/23/09 at 4:48pm
The current state of rap-inspired drinking, so far as I can tell:

Alizee - no one drinks it
Henn - eternal
Courvoisier - hard to pronounce when you're high, just go with the Henn
Hypnotiq - yes
Patron - now with cranberry or coke!!!!
Bud Ice - I dunno if it got mentioned in a song, but our crowd is convinced that extra .3% ABV (give or take) gets them fucked up.
That light pink vodka cocktail that comes in a perfume bottle being pushed by P. Diddy - fail, at least in the dirty south.

RumpleMinze & Goldschlager - kept on hand in case white college kids take the wrong exit.
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post #15 of 18
7/23/09 at 5:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jayhawk1412 View Post
Yup...mix it with Hennessey and make "Incredible Hulks"

Urban stuff for sure
These are actually pretty fucking good. Although I wouldn't waste decent cognac on it.
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