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White tie - Page 2

post #16 of 24
One thing concerned me about this scenario:

I have seen many weddings where the groom was in tails and the groomsmen were in dinner jackets; perhaps a bit incongruous, but seemingly acceptable in many circles. It sounds like this is not the case, with an afternoon wedding and a black-tie evening reception. Now, even with this stated on the invites, it would not be out of the question for the groom to be in white tie to stand out, just as the bride would be in a white gown. What I wonder is if it might be considered a breech of ettiquite for a male guest to wear white tie and tails if all of the other male guests (sans the groom) are in dinner jackets-wouldn't this be akin to a female guest showing up to a wedding in a white dress ( a well-established no-no). I fear this young man might look smashing and dapper in white tie, and yet because of this stick out like a sore thumb due to that fact. Just my two cents...anyone want to add a nickel or two?
post #17 of 24
You raise a valid point. However in this case it sounds as if Etienne has cleared it with the groom, so he should be ok. And welcome to SF
post #18 of 24
Thread Starter 
Yes, I have cleared it with the groom (a close friend of mine). Given the importance of the event, I still intend to go back to him for confirmation before I do anything, just to be sure he was not just being polite and that this is truly something he has no problems with.
post #19 of 24
OK, but even if it is cleared with the groom that does not guarantee that it won't look like a faux paus to the other guests; unless you want to wear a big sticker on your nice tailcoat saying "I know this looks out of ordinary and I am standing out, but the groom said it was OK," I would just wear a smashing dinner jacket (which seems like the easier thing to do anyway).
post #20 of 24
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MrDaniels
OK, but even if it is cleared with the groom that does not guarantee that it won't look like a faux paus to the other guests.
Ah, but what a conversation starter, don't you think? Plus the groom intends to wear a top hat and have a cane, I won't go that far, so he will stand out anyway.
post #21 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Étienne
Ah, but what a conversation starter, don't you think? Plus the groom intends to wear a top hat and have a cane, I won't go that far, so he will stand out anyway.

Hmm, the cane is one thing, but the top hat is not an optional accessory per se.

It is essential when wearing white tie outdoors (see The Great Gatsby film), but obviously wearing a hat indoors is a faux pas. Typically they are worn to and from white tie dinners, but not at (although, if one is arriving by car, they are not strictly necessary).

Of course, a man is king in his own castle...he can do what he wants at his wedding, but it seems rather perverse to adopt a traditional style for its formality, but to do it in a plainly incorrect fashion. A tailcoat and starched wing collar is elegant enough by itself, when indoors, to stand out and look marvellous.

If you're the Best Man, I think that the pair of you wearing white tie together would be a very nice gesture - it shows not only that you are being thoughtful, but that you are prepared to go to trouble and expense for your friend.

I myself shall probably marry in bespoke morning dress. It seems thoroughly unfair that my outfit should cost any less than the wedding dress...
post #22 of 24
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Manton
One other idea (very hit or miss): occasionally our own resident eBay sellers offer vintage Savile Row tailcoats. Obviously, you never know when they will have one, or if it will be your size. But that would be cool if it worked out.
I inquired about MTM here in Paris and found an outfit willing to do it. My only trouble so far is that they don't have a pattern for a full-back waistcoat. Does anybody know where I would find such a thing?
post #23 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Étienne
I inquired about MTM here in Paris and found an outfit willing to do it. My only trouble so far is that they don't have a pattern for a full-back waistcoat. Does anybody know where I would find such a thing?


if the cant make a waistcoat pattern from their basic vest pattern, then i would not trust them. its an easy change to make.
post #24 of 24
Quote:
Originally Posted by Étienne
Ah, but what a conversation starter, don't you think? Plus the groom intends to wear a top hat and have a cane, I won't go that far, so he will stand out anyway.

you can rent a top hat.
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